Since no one has done this...

[Avengardh]

This is a story-creation-thing, yes, you have to at least add one line to the story.

There was once a chicken named Andre, he was so tired so he decided to take a nap on the nearest shadowy mountain. On the way there, he encountered....

[Your turn]

~*Aven*~

[Division56]

a small shrew. The shrew's name was Charlie, aka, Charlie the shrew.

[flan2dave]

Normally, Andre thought, shrews do not inhabit this part of the mountains. Andre wondered if the shrew is a traveller like himself. Certainly the shrew would find a chicken's appearance in these parts all the more perplexing.

[Melody]

Charlie told Andre that a bunch of dark clouds were closing in on their location, like a pack of vicious herbivores ready to shade a helpless patch of grass. They sought shelter and found...

[Jkrs]

..a cavern, full of conveniently glowing crystals, since that's how these things work. Thunder rumbled behind them, along with the first drops of rain.

[Division56]

The cavern provided admirable shelter from nature's feircer elements. They quickly engaged in interesting and socially stimulating conversation.

[Jkrs]

Being some distance from their respective homes, this tended to centre around how they'd arrived.

"That's a very long story, starting with the rabid yak at the carnival."
It was.

At length, the chicken noticed it was standing on something other than rock or dirt.


(Assign that bit of dialogue to whoever you'd like.
And Divi? Your last sentence combines well with the first of your sig. :D )

[Claverhouse]

"What's this yellow stuff ?" she asked of no-one in particular, yet with such emphasis that each considered the question a direct challenge. Yet really she was merely astounded that it was not, as she had hoped, corn, and had scarcely noticed in her anguish the arrival of the ferret and the fox.
After the fox had assured everyone that gold was not edible by anyone...


Claverhouse :ph34r:


:devil:

[Avengardh]

André thought to himself "Whoa, I can change sex at will!", they sat around chatting about the old ways, when one could walk around with nothing on and, well, just be an animal.

"Today we have to *wear* clothing, it's unheard of" - The chicken added.

Suddenly it started to rain....

[jittus rye]

which seemed very peculiar seeing as they were all inside of a cave, but everyone soon noted it wasn't raining in the cave, the cave was merely leaky. The ferret being a woman of structural engineering noted that yellow glowing crystals acted as very good pillars, but foundations of gold are not always stable.

Low and behold...

[ohnoaninfp]

The roof to the front of the cave began to collapse. They all ran to the back of the cave realizing it leads in to three tunnels. The go into the middle tunnel and find..........

[Division56]

the cave of The Mole People. The Mole People were alarmed at this intrusion. They quickly surrounded the adventurers and offered them a complimentary continental breakfast.

[Claverhouse]

Which they accepted gratefully; for some reason the moles insisted on the ferret having six helpings, after which he fell asleep in the fox's lap. The fox then told them the story of his life, by which time it was lunch-time. The ferret woke up and ate heartily ( the moles discreetly counting their numerous off-spring afterwards ) and then exclaimed:



Claverhouse :ph34r:


( PS: Sorry, in England the word chicken is generally female, cock or rooster for a male. Strictly speaking you are correct, but males are so few ( the boys are all crushed when a few days old ) we think of them as girls ).

[Melody]

"We have to..." Suddenly, the ferret's guts started pouring out of its stomach. Andre and the shrew ran to its feet, grabbing its intestines and trying to keep them inside the ferret. The fox...

[Strephonade]

...yells, "Ohmygod, there's something inside there!!"

The ferret gurgles and vomits: "Grhhhgllbblhhhph..."

"Ooohh..." says the shrew, feeling a bit wobbly....

(oops, I switched tenses--sorry)

[Division56]

Then the magic butter-fly flew into the cave and waved its magical wings at the ferret and all the gorge and gore magically flew back into its rightful place. "Behold" said the magic butter-fly "I healed him using The Blood of Jeessusss!"

[Melody]

Suddenly, the ferret's guts pour out again in a bloody, relentless avalanche. They pour out so fast, they are projected across the floor and trip a bunch of moles who were watching the TV show...

[ohnoaninfp]

The ferret lays dying in Andre's wings. The others look on in horror and revulsion. Suddenly the ferret and the bloody mess vanishes. The mole people......

[Melody]

Watched the TV show "Rescue 911."

[ohnoaninfp]

"Is there anything we can do to save him?" one of the mole people asked not realizing the ferret was dead and gone. The they all heard a low growl and saw to red orbs that were glowing like fireballs from hell.

[Division56]

The red orbs turned out to be Borg drones! They quickly came and assimilated the ferret, saving his very life.

[Melody]

Meanwhile, at the other end of Earth, a young child chases a...

[Division56]

small purple butter-fly.

[Avengardh]

Which turned into a giant bubble and took the child away to...

[ohnoaninfp]

the cave of the mole people, where andre and the others where. The ferret now alive and happy decided that they should press on and try to find a way out of the cave. They walk into a another dark tunnel. A naseoating smell came to their noses and they heard some dread ful noises. They suddenly realize what the stench and the awful sounds were coming from. It was a.......

[Melody]

diet pepsi, left open for the last thirty-eight years. There was a huge fractal structure of sugar growing out of its opening. Tiny ants crawled all over it, pecking at it to get to its resources. The structure had many things inside of it, including pennies, underwear, and people. The people were wide-eyed and...

[KentOhio]

somehow felt strangely drawn towards the sticky tower. Only Andre and Charlie had the good sense to stay behind. As for all the others, they seemed to be in a trance-like state, walking ever-closer to the gooey fractal. Only after reaching it did they find out...

[Claverhouse]

it was a portal to another world. Unfortunately this other world was based on Las Vegas, so they returned immediately, except for those who accepted the free snacks, which trapped them there until a saviour would come to rescue the inhabitants. Charlie and Andre were waiting for them, and they all decided to go down another tunnel.

[KentOhio]

So there they stood, this time with 5 tunnels to choose from. Charlie the shrew keenly eyed a centipede skampering off into one of the tunnels. Knowing full-well that centipedes are not only the beloved food of shrews, but also of chickens and Mole People, Charlie kept this sighting to himself. With dreams of his own private centipede feast, Charlie said, "Let's take this tunnel," and they all followed. "Why did you choose this tunnel, Charlie?," they asked. So he answered back...

[Melody]

"I listened to a lot of Eminem when I was young." Everyone nodded understandingly. They reached a door that was locked. The child...

[ohnoaninfp]

karate kicked the door down. "I am a black belt", the child said beaming with pride. Inside side the room their was a blue substance with little orange creatures, with huge teeth swimming in it. Andre and one of the mol-people edged in a little closer to examine the glowing blue liquid, all of the sudden the mole person lost his footing and fell in. He was covered in the stuff, and began to......................

[Melody]

spontaneously explode. Everyone shreeked and began feeling dizzy. Something strange was happening. But what? The child...

[Division56]

took out a needle and shot up with heroin. Then he said "Now I feel better."

[Claverhouse]

The moles and the rest edged away from the blue pool where the orange creatures were doing a square dance in formation swimming. Picking up the child's limp body they exited the room praying for their fallen comrade; once they were through the door they saw...



Claverhouse :ph34r:

[Slider]

" . . . they saw KISS in concert and-"

"I don't give a fuck about your imaginary world, dude," said his friend. "I told you to lay off the mescaline, dammit. You took too much - wot the fuck is a mole-people? Andre . . . Andre the chicken? Christ, d'you wanna have everyone lookin' at us? and stop doing the chicken dance, you're not one!

"You're spazzing out, man - you almost shot up that 9 year old over there with smack, goddammit. His mother was freaking out. I had to tell her it was just the sick joke of some epileptic lunatic.

"Now try to act normal," he said helping Andre navigate the precarious terrain of marble stairs. "We need to get a loan for the . . ."

[Melody]

"...Mini MG Turbo we want to buy. How else are we going to become professional race car drivers?" It was an incredible plan. They were planning on buying a car to race people and win money. It was a flawless plan. Triplefists "John" Mac n' Twats, the guy who used to beat them up all the time in grade school, had already challenged them to a race.

They reached the floor they wanted to reach, and walked to the door they wanted to walk to. They opened the door with their hands. Inside...

[ohnoaninfp]

was a chicken covered in glowing blue goo. It touched Andre and shrieked a piercing cry that made everyones ears bleed. Andre noticed that their was green moldy fur growing on him. It began to eat at him. Andre........

[Avengardh]

Pecked at it and ate it as he exclaimed:
"Mmmm, brings back memories of home"

The moldy-fur stopped forming and everyone was anxious to leave but André announced:
"Just give me a few seconds to peck at it until I form some stylish pants!"-He did just as he said, and *man*, no one would have ever guessed he was a chicken dressed like that, James Bond looked like a fool compared to him.

At that instant, the mole people bowed before him...it seemed André was the long lost God of the...

[ohnoaninfp]

nazrats, the sworn enemy of the mole people. Only a god of the nazrats can grow green moldy fur pants that glow. The mole people became so furious that they wanted to kill Andre, unless Andre can prove he has no affiliation to the nazrats. Andre decided to.................

[Strephonade]

...reverse the polarity of the local gravity field.

[ohnoaninfp]

His planned worked, but not only was everyone floating, the moles were extremely pissed off. Andre put the poles of gravitation back and everyone was on the ground. The moles were about to kill Andre when an army of nazrats dressed in pink leotards flooded the moles cave. The nazrats decided to........

[paladinoflunaria]

... use an ancient spell to summon an abomination from the Far Realms of Insanity. How the nazrats were intelligent enough to understand the esoteric writings of Daruth Winterwood, and more how they attained such objects, was baffling. The nazrats quickly made an arch-shaped door and carved 42 runes around the door in order to call the Dweller Beyond the Treshold...

[ohnoaninfp]

the Dweller was out to lunch. Inside was a green glowing, moldy cheese sandwich that smelled like turtle excrement. One of the mole people picked it up. A nazrat snatched it away from him, and took a large bite. "Mmmm, the power of cheese" the little pink leotard rodent said wile munching on the filthy disgusting nuclear cheese sand wich. Suddenly the moldy cheese eating nazrat.....................................

[KentOhio]

was picked up by the Dweller From Beyond The Threshold. The Dweller held the little creature in between his giant thumb and forefinger. "Who dare desecrate the Sacred Sandwich of Old!" the Dweller exclaimed. "I shall have to punish you, your children, and your children's children!" The nazrat squirmed within the Dweller's strong grasp. Seeing this opportunity, Andre and Charlie, along with the mole people, .....

[Strephonade]

...dashed between the Dweller's feet and through the doorway...

[ohnoaninfp]

While holding their noses as they discovered the floor was covered with rotten fruit. The mole- people forgave Andre. The green moldy pants disapeared and everyone rejoiced. Sudddenly the fox vomited from the smell. The Dweller turned around, popped the nazrat in his mouth and swallowed him whole. The Dweller skipped toward Andre and the others with an angry glare. He...............

[KentOhio]

said, "You can't leave without signing my guestbook!" Knowing what the consequences would be, they all agreed to sign the giant's guestbook. The fow even left a nice little doodle. Unfortunately, the Dweller misinterpreted the doodle. "How dare you draw that!" the Dweller said. As a result of your inappropriate behavior, I shall have to....

[antireconciler]

... duel you to the death in a doodling contest!" After the moles had had time to place their bets, and the fox was charged and ready to go, they found the Dweller in the back room punching itself in the gut! Appearantly the nazrat was making it's way back up! The moles again started placing bets, but the fox was already ...

[Slider]

there's a bunch of 9s on here pretending to be 5s.

[jimkopelli]

The ferret, who had mysteriously respawned as a evil doom ferret doom zombie of doom a few yards away, leapt back into the circles of light from the crystals and...

[Jkrs]

..was thoroughly congratulated by the mole people on his timely return and updated on the odds (176:1, Dwellers' favour). Meanwhile the fox was already running, in hopes of making it to another zip code. Andre - who had $20 riding on the outcome of the match - jumped onto his back and suceeded only in being carried along.

Through a couple of doors and a maze of hallways, the foxes' path was blocked by a greenish-purple ooze. A label floated past in just-legible handwriting: 'shoggoth cutting - not rooted'.

An eyeball appeared in the mass, then another..

[Spartan26]

there's a bunch of 9s on here pretending to be 5s.
hahahahahahahaha :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Meanwhile, back to the story

had already made it back to the street and was waving for a cab. "Screw you and all your mushroom licking friends!" The fox reached for the handle of a cab and was pushed out of the way by some lady with way too much mousse.
"Watch it, pal. I was here first!" The lady hissed.
"Hey, aren't you Rikki Lake?" The fox stood befuddled.
"What's it to yo...Hey, he's wearing fur! Get him!"

Out of nowhere, a band of co-dependent, obsessive complusive, pill poppers lunged out of the shadows. They tried to circle the fox when...

[antireconciler]

... the Dweller, out-of-breath from the chase and covered in green ooze with eyeballs poking out, picked up Rikki Lake and ate her, making sure to chew this time. The Dweller looked pretty torn up from his fight with the nazrat. To the moles' disgust, they had eventually called it a draw. Without thier leader, the co-dependent, obsessive compulsive, pill poppers had a strange off-topic conversation about 9's pretending to be 5's at some place called intpcentral.com. Appearantly it was really funny, but the fox didn't get it. The fox and Andre throught they had a great chance to escape when the evil doom ferret doom zombie of doom teleported in and ...

[Avengardh]

questioned André about his family values.
"I bet you haven't sent money back home in ages!"

André looked down and sniffled.
"I wanted to bring home the world...but...all I could do was bring back more seed..."

The ferret thought he was pathetic, so it decided to sprout wings and conquer the world.
Meanwhile back at home, André's little brother, Jovi, who was known for his divination powers (among other things) finally found out where his beloved older brother was. In a flash of crimson light he vanished only to find himself right next to his brother and said...

[antireconciler]

... "Andre, I'm known for my divination powers (among other things), and a ferret sprouting wings is an ill omen spoken of in 'D&D Core Rulebook Gift Set, Version 4'". Andre was more concerned, however, that Jovi's crimson flash was edging on the sanguine-side, and wondered if Jovi might be losing his touch. When confronted, Jovi ...

[Avengardh]

had the nerve to peck at his brother's neck.
"Owie..."-André exclaimed-"I'm sorry that I am not as famous as you little brother! At least I am not losing my touch when I teleport!"

Jovi gasped, as this offended him inmensely.
"How DARE you?! First of all, last I checked, you CAN'T teleport, and second of all, I came here to rescue you!"

André felt the anger rising...rising...and....

[KentOhio]

the mole people saw a chance to place more bets. The majority of them sensed that a full-scale cockfight was imminent. Most of the mole people favored Jovi, on the condition that...

[antireconciler]

... André really couldn't teleport and that André would accept the name "Andre" since the moles had a hard time finding the "é" on thier keyboards. The Dweller, to stir things up, grabbed a couple moles and started munching on them. Distracted, André and Jovi began scolding the Dweller. The Dweller couldn't just eat everyone because there wouldn't be anyone left. One of the moles used Ctrl+Y to kill the Dweller and accessed the CLUAConsole to respawn the moles. André, sensing the power of the moles' keyboards, ...

[ohnoaninfp]

decided that maybe he can kill the evil ferret of doom. He pressed Ctrl+Y to attempt and kill the ferret. The ferret wasn't not slain, instead the ferret grew to an enormus size. "HA ha, you stupid fool! You only made my powers stronger! Now you shall die! " The ferret screamed with his eyes blazing like the fire from hell. Just when the ferret was about to kill andre, a group of P51 Mustangs came to the rescue. The killed the ferret by.............

[Claverhouse]

being whisked off to the Bermuda Triangle and carrying him along --- for a short part of the time --- in their vortex. Andre and Jovi fell into each other's wings "Brother ! they squawked in unison; "We must never fight again." said Jovi heavily moved. "Never" cried out Andre.

The Mole-people looked revolted. All bets were off. As the two birds began discussing their chickhood, the fox decided...



Claverhouse :ph34r:

[ohnoaninfp]

to play a violin. Every one was happy until they saw a large flying bunny with huge gaping jaws. It was about to eat the fox when a P51 shot it down. Thinking the rabbit was dead a mole went to examine it. The bunny licked him up and crushed the poor critter with his iron jaws. The bunny started to get up. It growled and licked it s chops. Andre and the others saw the P51 coming back to do a bombing run on the bunny. They ran and head for cover. The Mustang dropped a couple bombs on the fearsome beast. The rabbit exploded. The airplane landed by Andre. They all cheered and were happy that the evil demonic thing was gone. The they looked on in horror when they saw what came out of the dust. There were now two large evil bunnies with large gaping jaws and piercing blood red eyes. A bunny grabbed jovie by the leg. Andre...................

[antireconciler]

was glad it was jovie, a stuffed version of Jovi. Since Charlie somehow disappeared and was no longer being referenced, André took the opportunity to return the memory allocated to Charlie to the heap so it could be reused, then ...

[KentOhio]

looked over and noticed the pilot coming out of the P-51. The pilot was not a human. Instead, the plane had been guided by...

[Claverhouse]

George Bush. "Freeze Suckers !" squeaked the president, "Anyone suspected of grand malfesence against my person shall be held as Illegal Combatants, denied access to our legal system, such as it is, and dressed in orange jumpsuits. Where's the oil ?"



Claverhouse :ph34r:

[ohnoaninfp]

The evil bunny spat out the the stuffed Jovi and grabbed Andre. Just when the the evil vermin from hell was about to munch on him another mustang came to the rescue. It tried drop a load of Miller Light beer on the monster that had Andre, but got the other rabbit instead. The rabbit that had beer over it began to scream and melted. It was soaked into the ground. The rabbit that had Andre began to cough and spit . It spat Andre out . Andre was flying through the air. The mustang caught him on the wing. The bunny gagged and died. The mustang landed gently, so Andre would be safe. "Oh great. Who is it now? Kerry?" The fox grumbled. Out of the cock pit stumbled a round black cat. "Hey you!" "Give me back my other plane!" She yelled to Bush. "Oops Sorry" Bush said apologetically "How did you escape the bunny?" The cat asked Andre, perturbed because a little while ago she just saw the rabbit devour a whole chicken house. "Oh I covered my self in.................

[Claverhouse]

Holy Water and crossed myself" Andre confessed; "The old tricks are usually the best." --- "Glory !" shouted Bush, and began a prayer-meeting with the bewildered remnants of the mole-people. The black cat looked a trifle cynical and began washing her more private areas vigorously. Andre proposed they all have a good sleep since so far they had been moving and fighting as if they'd been in a non-stop Jackie Chan flick. After posting guards, slowly they fell asleep, including the guards. In the morning...


Claverhouse :ph34r:

[Birdsnest]

Well, those red fireballs faded into cinders and the world had long forgotten about the ferrets. Unbeknownst to anyone, there lay hidden deep in someones closet, a white silk sack with a newborn litter of ferrets. This young litter quickly grew into a mischievous bunch, that wandered out into the shoes and such. And, now, their mother could no longer keep them hidden in that sack. They were ready to venture out of the sack, and into the world. It just so happened that whoever lived in that room heard the rustling going on and discovered the sack and peered in and found 6 pairs of brown ferret eyes peering back. The sack was thrown upon someones back and the journey began into the wildneress on a quest to find the perfect place to set them free. A long day of searching ended when at last, the mysterious hand of fate opened the sack and released the ferret family at the mouth of the mole caves.

[antireconciler]

In the mole's absence, the ferrets found only the nazrats. Being ferrets, the nazrats could smell them hours ahead of time. The nazrats, knowing that, since they had not been returned to the heap, they still had a role to play in this fight-for-the-world flick, the ferrets would likely interfere with thier plans to end confusing run-on sentences like this one. They quickly went to Red Alert and executed Contingency Plan Ferret 5. As soon as the ferrets were in sight ...

[KentOhio]

the Nazrats, instead of executing Plan 5, all dropped to their knees. "The Six Ferrets of the New Age!" a Nazrat shouted. "Indeed, these six are those of which the elders prophesized." The Nazrats all started bowing and chanting before the Six. According to legend, six special ferrets would one day be sent to...

[antireconciler]

a pet store, where they belonged, where one would be sold (sucker!) and they would become the Five spoken of in the "Prophesies of the Age After This One". They would one day be sent to ...

[Claverhouse]

dance the Imperial Dance of World-Becoming, ushering in a New Age of peace and plenty ( for ferrets ); when the Lost Brother would by a process of transfer through pure thought, join them and temporarily become The One in the mighty flux and flow of the combined mind of his siblings. There was no time to lose


Claverhouse :ph34r:

[ohnoaninfp]

Meanwhile Andre and the others began to look for the ferrets, So they can take them to the neverending flower garden and let them free. The cat, being a skilled huntress tracked the baby ferrets back to the mole caves. They all went to the mole caves and encountered the nazrats. "We shall kill you mole bastards for trying to take our prophesized wise leaders." The nazrats moved in to kill Andre and the little moles. Just then a nazrat went flying in the air. The cat caught him. "You are now mine!" She said with an evil laugh. She ate the little rodent. "MMM look at alls these tasty vermin." She said licking her chops. "Who will be my next victim?" The cat said as she looked for a nazrat that looked tasty enough. "Come on guys, This is the black fat cat of doom that has been prophosized by the little green Marble.", a nazrat squeaked in terror. "Retreat!" the nazrats sccreamed as they ran away in horror, leaving the ferrets behind. The cat picked off a couple retreating nazrats, while Andre...............

[antireconciler]

... choked on a little green Marble. Silly Andre, that's not seed! "Help!" he clucked.

Meanwhile, with the ferrets Lost Brother with them in thier minds, they knew they had to turn around. There was the Lost Brother! The ferrets thought he had joined them by transfer of pure thought, but that was because his overwhelming stench was making them hallucinate. Combined in actuality, they ...

[ohnoaninfp]

began to vomit profusely. The cat saw the mess and threw up as well. Andre decided that they must react fast. They had to bathe the little ferret before he made everyone vomit to death. They threw the stinky little furball into a sack. "Where are we going to find a place to bathe the little stinker?" The cat groaned trying to recover from the smell. They all decided to venture into another tunnel. They saw a doorway, which lead to a light blue pond. "An underground pond?" The fox asked looking at the light blue water. They dropped the little stinky ferret in the water. As he was swimming a giant fish with huge teeth came up and swallowed him whole. The fox.................

[Claverhouse]

began singing 'This is the End' in the style of Jim Morrison, whilst Andre, unnerved by his rough experiences culminating in hearing this by no means cheerful ditty echoing and re-echoing in the stony chamber, sat down and wept. Would he ever see Jovi again ? Meanwhile the cat, whose great-great grandmother was a Turkish Van, married to a Ginger English tom-cat, dived in a sweeping arch into the limpid pool, grasped the tail-fin of the fish and forced it to the shore, where it almost willingly disgorged the ferret ( which had inadvertently upset the fish's stomach ), before swimming off at haste. The ferret shook himself well, spraying his friends with not only his own odourous wetness, but some slime from the stomach as well. The cat climbed out and ruefully rubbed herself down with a towel....

[ohnoaninfp]

"Damn, There goes my lunch." The cat said angrily as she watched the fish swim away. She tried to lick her glistening black fur, while Andre tried to figure out how to get the ferret to stop stinking up the place. "Hold on I got an idea!" the now clean cat said eagerly. She ran back trough the way they came. A little while later they heard a rumbling noise. It was a P51 taxining its way into the room. The engine stopped and the cat jumped out of the cockpit. "I could't leave my baby behind." She said petting the plane. She had a container of cat litter, which she dumped on the wet ferret. It helped the smell, but now the ferret was covered in wet clumpy litter. Andre had a better idea. "I know, we should.....................

[antireconciler]

... freeze him in carbonite! We can convert the P51 into a carbon freezing chamber in a matter of minutes!"
"Quickly," shrieked the cat, "the ferret's stink is corroding the P51! We don't have much time!"

[ohnoaninfp]

"Wait!" "I don't want you to mess with my baby!' She cried as she ran out of the cave. The other plane that George Bush flew was rolled in. "Use this one instead, since he got his ameobas all over it." The cat said trying to protect her plane. "Hurry up before I shoot the litter critter for coroding my plane!" The cat hissed, not wanting any harm coming to her "precious". Finally the plane with Bush germs on it was transformed into a carbon freezing chamber. They put the vermin in. He came out frozen. "Mmm a ferret popsicle. Looks good." They cat said drooling. Just then the fox accidentally dropped the frozen ferret on to Charlie the shrew. The ferret broke into a million pieces and Charlie had hurt his back. Andre.........................................

[Claverhouse]

by now had totally lost it, and was running around making little clucking noises ( which, after all, was not totally surprising considering he was a chicken ). The fox and the cat reverently disposed of the ferret pieces and then sat back rubbing their stomachs. Once Andre had recovered his mind, and was able to watch TV in the back of the plane, they strapped themselves in and sat back "What we gonna tell the ferrets ?" asked the fox...

[antireconciler]

... but got no answer. The cat was preoccupied with a system log trying to figure out how Charlie the Shrew had made a comeback. He could have sworn Andre deallocated him some time ago. If there were two instances, could there be more? Maybe Andre hadn't though. Otherwise, would she even remember Charlie? She hadn't even seen Charlie enter the room.
"What?", asked the cat. The fox gave the cat an irritated stare. "Oh! Right! The ferrets! Can't we freeze them too? That was incredible."
"I better keep an eye on Andre", replied the fox.
Grumbling, the cat climbed out of the plane and ...

[ohnoaninfp]

yelled "Andre get a hold on yourself!" "You are acting like a moron, come on now!" "you are supposed to be the sane one!" "Knock it off, or I'll bite your skinny, little head off!" The cat yelled , furious that Andre had lost it, that she didn't understand what the fox was trying to tell her, and the ferret that she and the fox ate, was giving her cramps. Andre stopped immediatly, not wanting to be come the kitty's dinner. The other ferrets came around looking for their brother. Charlie was with them. He was rubbing his back and cursing under his breath. "Where is our brother?" they asked, a little worried and annoyed that they didn't know what was going on. The fox......................................

[antireconciler]

... replied, "Not far. Lost Brother not far. Patience. Soon you will be with him. Rootleaf, I cook." The ferrets followed the fox into a darker chamber of the nazrat cave as he kept saying short, nonsensical sentences and chucking to himself.
The cat was confused, didn't the fox just say he was going to look after Andre? Maybe the sight of ferret was just too irresistable. Well, the fox could have them if it ment more of these cramps. The cat started showing Charlie some stretches that would help his back, wondering if someday she would be allowed a name like the shrew was. In the dark chamber ...

[ohnoaninfp]

The fox licked his lips. He began to drool, at the thought of eating the little rodents. He lit a candle and saw ferocious monster that was the size of a house. The monster licked up the ferrets and ate them. It eyed the fox, drooling hugrily. The fox screamed and ran out of the chamber. "WHAT IN THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!" the cat shrieked startled by the fox's cry. She found out soon enough. The monster came out. It was a giant cockroach with green eyes. It looked at all of them and began to salivate. "Holy.........." a stream of obscenities came out of the cats mouth as she fainted. Andre looked at the giant bug and came up with a plan. Andre and Charlie the shrew defeated the evil cockroah from hell by...................

[antireconciler]

... stepping back a few inches. The persuing house-sized cockroach from hell got stuck in the doorway and was effectively neutralized. The fox was shaking his head, having a strong feeling of déjà vu. Meanwhile, Andre was tearing off a cockroach leg, and fixing it on a spit over a fire, as everyone was still hungry. The cat awoke suddenly. In a dream, her ancestors had named her ...

[ohnoaninfp]

Artimas, when here real name was cleo. She looked at the big dead cockroach and vomited. "I hate those damn things." The cat said. They were all eating a cockroach feast, except for the cat who was terrified of cockroaches. She just ate kibble that she had hidden away in her plane. They were all singing and laughing. The cat became enthralled by a string and was playing with it. They soon fell a sleep and felt safe for the first time of their journey. They were awaked by a load groaning coming from on of the tunnels. It sounded like somone was wailing in pain. Charlie, Andre, Cleo , and the fox decided to check it out. They saw a form glowing in the distance. It was a..............................

[KentOhio]

robot warming up its vocal chords. "Do Ray Mi Fa So La Ti Do," it sang, as it became more tuned. Its light bulbs blinked on and off and it rolled over to the group.
"Who let you backstage?" the robot asked.
"Backstage?" Andre repeated.
Sensing confusion, the robot explained the situation; "Yes, backstage. None of you are in the choir. Why, you're not even robots. You have no business being here."
"Huh?" asked the fox.
The robot went on, "Don't you know that the world's most prominent millionaires culminate in this cavern once a year to hold robot vocal contests? The acoustics are excellent. I am owned by Terry Van Hunker, the millionaire banker. He promised me and the rest of the robots of my choir that if we win first prize, ...

[ohnoaninfp]

We would win a life supply of oil and a million dollars. The robot said beaming. I would prefer a life time supply of beer and catnip. Cleo said staring at the robot. We are lost Andre said apologetically. Do you know the way out of these tunnels? The fox asked. Nope, we were beamed here. The robot explained. Who is that? He is so handsome! Is he single? The robot said drooling. Who in the hell are you talking about? The cat said annoyed by the obnoxious machine. Him! They way his skin catches the luster of the light, His wheels are so tiny, but yet sturdy, his long strong arms that seem to want to catch a gal like me! The robot went on dreamily. You mean my plane?!? Here I thought you ment Andre. The cat said irritated. Andre sighed. No body loves me. He said quietly.
The robot made its way to the plane. Back off bitch! That is my p51 mustang! You touch it and you die! Cleo yelled as she pulled out a gun and aimed at the robot. Oh great a cat fight. Charlie groaned. He is not yours anymore he is mine and I am not going to give him back. The robot said as it patted the plane. Cleo fired. The bullet hit the robot in the head but it was unfazed. Cassandra ! A mans voice called to the robot. Get on stage he said angrily. Cassandra.......

[Miss Padfoot]

gave Cleo the middle finger (of three, not five - robots don't need five) and said, "Next time we meet, you're toast!" But by this time Cleo didn't care that the robot was more durable and powerful than her. She was mad. She was holding a grudge as only an angry cat can. Cassandra left and Cleo looked around the plane for something to throw at Cassandra during her big solo. Eventually she decided on...

[MasterMerk]

...A hollow, glass jar. It had a label, which read, "Do not throw this jar, contents highly dangerous." Cleo took no notice of this, and pocketed the mysterious jar.

The group decided to explore the area some more. Through the tunnels, they entered into a great hall, paintings spread out across the ceiling. The reoccurring image was that of a Chicken, surrounded by holy light, head held high. The word "Erdna" was surrounding the chook, which seemed strangely familiar to all of them. All was interrupted, however, when the group spotted a hunched figure in the corner. It…

[ohnoaninfp]

was Cassandra. "Oh great not her agian." Cleo growled softly. Well it's round two and you are going to die now. The robot sneered. While the cat and the robot were fighting, everyone placed bets. The mole people and the fox bet on Cassandra. Andre and Charlie bet on Cleo. The robot grabbed Cleo by the throat. Now I am going to crush you. The machine laughed. Cleo hissed. All of the sudden sparks began to fly and Cassandra began yelling out system failure, Warning. She dropped the cat. Take cover! Cleo yelled. Cassandra exploded and died, taking a mole, that was a little too curious with her. What did you do? Andre asked amazed that the cat had mysteriously defeated the machine. Well when you got to go, you got to go. I am a cat you know. Cleo said while licking a wound on her paw. Andre groaned with disgust. The moles grudgingly handed the money over to charlie and Andre. Why is there a whole bunch of posters with a glowing chicken on the wall? Cleo asked a little irritated at seeing the same chicken all over the place. I know him. Andre said staring at the picutre. He is...............

[antireconciler]

the district manager for all the KFC's for miles around.", Andre growled. "Satanist wolf!"
After calming down, Andre told them about thier encounter, many years ago ...

[KentOhio]

"He was my high school swimming instructor," explained Andre. "All the other chickens in my class and I at first thought nothing of him. He kept pushing us to bulk up and become meatier, but we all thought he was just using good athletic sense. As coach, he kept a list of all the heaviest birds and, at the end of the swimming season, offered them 'summer jobs.' Little did they know that...

[Melody]

"He constantly visited http://www.dietpepsi.com ."

[ohnoaninfp]

and had a contract with the KFC corporation. That lunatic is still alive and is still leading chickens to their doom. Andre vented. Wow that is fucked up! Cleo exclaimed. Everyone looked at her, surprised that she had the worst language of them all, and she is supposed to be the lady. He is in this everlasting cave somewhere and we are going to find him and make him pay. Andre vowed as he remebered his two friends who were fried by the chicken named Vector. Cleo wispered something in to Andres ear. Yes my dear you can eat him when we are through with him. Andre said a little steamed at seeing his old enemy all over the place. Thats not fair! Why does she get to eat the treacherous chicken? The foxed whined. Stupid cat. He said snarling. Cleo stuck her tongue out at him and stuck up her middle claw. Ok enough guys, we have to get going. They went in a seemingly dark tunnel and to their amazement they found......

[Melody]

...complete darkness.

[Avengardh]

...and a rubber duck the size of two city blocks....therefore they...

[antireconciler]

... must have all run into it. The remarkably low pitched dog-toy sqeak it made when they did this allowed Andre to calculate it's monstrous size. But how to apply so much force? Cleo must have seriously put on weight. This made them suspicious ...

[Melody]

...oh, did it. They were like suspicion Nazis.

[KentOhio]

"Fox, what is that on your... uh... posterior?" asked Andre.
"It's nothing. Why are you looking at my butt? Keep your eyes to yourself!" the fox screamed back.
"No, I see it too," Cleo said. "My God, it's a swastika tattoo! Fox, I demand that you explain this!"
The fox, seeing that they were both now suspicious of him, had to think fast. He...

[antireconciler]

calmly explained that he was a Neo-Nazi and a fascist, and apologized for screaming earlier. Everyone has thier own beliefs and opinions and the fox felt Cleo and Andre and the 2-city-block-size rubber duck would understand, which they ...

[Melody]

...decided...

[ohnoaninfp]

to kick his ass. Die you nazi son of a bitch! Cleo yelled as she pointed a pistol to the foxes head. The fox pleaded for his life. You support the nazis, who were nothing but evil, murderous, scum! She screamed enraged that he supported such an evil political party. Cleo cocked the gun. Now I shall send you to hell, were you belong! Cleo said as she put her claw on the trigger. The fox began to whimper. Wait! Andre cried. What for? Cleo growled. Let him explain him self. Fox why are you a neo-nazi? How can you stand for such an evil party, who caused the deaths of millions of people? Andre asked nervous that Cleo would blow the foxe's head off before he could answer. Cleo please put the gun down. Andre said scared that she might shoot him. She disarmed the gun with a hiss. You make one move and you are dead, you Hitler loving piece of trash. She kept her eyes in the fox as he explained his story. Well I..................

[antireconciler]

simply believe we must secure the existence of our people and a future for White children. (That and I like playing with Neo-Nazi Barbie and want to be like her when I grow up.)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v423/lucas5w4/nazibarbie_4.jpg
... and what is evil but our own lack of understanding?" Cleo ...

[Avengardh]

..and it's not just because she's Barbie! But because she has a nice A la-Bush hairdo (even though she really is kinda tannish), it's the coolest! So...

[antireconciler]

... if you kill me, will that make you any better than a murdering Barbie-doll?

[ohnoaninfp]

there is my reasoning for supporting the nazi party. The fox said defiantly, forgetting thatjust a moment ago he was pleading for his life like the little coward he was.I say we lynch him! George Bush exclaimed holding up a rope. Good bye asshole cleo said as she cocked and raised the gun to his temper. Wait don't! Andre cried. Before Cleo could pull the trigger the gian rubber duck leaned down with its beak wide open. It picked up the fox and clamped its bill shut. Andre and the others saw the fox being swallowed. They heard the foxe's terrified screams as he was being eaten by the ducks stomach juices. Eww Cleo groaned as she tried not to vomit. I would have given him a quick death. All of the sudden the duck tried to burp, but he couldn't. The giant rubber duck began to shake. Oh crap he is going to explode tkae cover. Cleo ran in to her plane and guided it behind a stone wall. Andre and the others joined her. The duck threw up stomach juice which splattered on a little mole who was too dumb to take cover. The liquid skeletonized the little rodent in a few seconds. That is sick! Cleo growled. I will kill that 20 story mother fucker if he got any of his goo on my plane! Cleo snarled. Fortunatly the plane was safe. Mean while..............................

[KentOhio]

inside the giant rubber duck, the fox was lauging and high-fiving his friends. "They fell for it!" he said. "They really think I was eaten. Little do they know that this giant rubber duck is a Nazi Tank." "Ya,Ya, das is gut," the fox's commander said. "Haha, Dump out more battery acid!" The fox yelled. "This time get Andre; he's such a dumb cluck." Giant caterpillar tracks emerged from the bottom of the duck tank. It slowly began to drive towards Andre and the gang. "Dump acid at will!" the fox shouted, hoping for a battlefield promotion. As Andre, Cleo, and the mole people were frozen with fear at the enormous machine, it...

[Strephonade]

...fell sideways into a wormhole and disappeared. *vwooop!*

[Crazy]

however, the combination of battery acid and yellow #5 enhanced butyl rubber caused the wormhole to stablize and remain open. Silouetted on the event horizon, a sinister looking figure approached the group. To thier shock and horror, it was......

[antireconciler]

Supreme Allied Commander Crazy5711 of the Dweller Alliance!
"Run for it!" Andre clucked wildly.
Cleo looked skeptical. "It's just another Dweller, dude."
Crazy5711 spoke ...

[ohnoaninfp]

How dare you speak such insolence in my presence. Sorry she doesan't mean it. Andre said nervously, remebering the last dweller they ran into. Can you tell us how to find this chicken? Cleo said holding up a picture of Vector the KFC district manager, and also a traitor to all chickens. He is in this tunnel somewhere the dweller # 2 boomed. Who dares throw a nazi tank, camaflaouged as a rubber duck in to my domain? Who ever is respondsible shall suffer severly. He roared, glaring at all of them. Just then the fox climber out of the hole. All my friends and fellow nazis are dead. The fox said, his voice trembling with anger. Cleo noticed that the fox was bruised and some of his fur was burnt off. Now I shall destroy you, you pudgy flea bitten, pshycotic, furball! The fox growled aiming a gun at Cleo. Cleo stared him down. I would have loved to hear your agonizing screams of pain while I crushed you with my tank. The fox sneered. Well this would just have to do. he said cocking the gun. Just then the gun was ripped out of the foxes paw, by Crazy5711. So it was your nazi tank! I hate nazis more than ducks. Now I shall deal with you. Crazy said as he picked up the fox. Crazy5711 punished the fox by............................

[antireconciler]

playing a Backstreet Boys CD really loud. Even the cave was shaking in agony.
Crazy5711 stopped, but the cave didn't. The ceiling started falling. Suddenly, Andre had a bright idea ...

[KentOhio]

He and the others would all take shelter under Crazy's legs. Surely they would be safe there; Crazy would have to stretch up his arms and shelter himself anyway. The ceiling fell, and, sure enough, Crazy supported it with his massive biceps. "I can't hold it much longer!" he said. "Go into my wormhole or you'll all be crushed!''
"What about you, Crazy? asked Andre, "Will you be alright?"
"Go!!" Crazy yelled, almost ready to collapse under the load. Just as it looked like he could stand no more, Cleo, Andre, and the mole people jumped through to the Dweller's dimension. They had no idea if he survived or not. After they were through, ...

[ohnoaninfp]

The P51 came rolling in. Thank God for this! Cleo said relieved that her baby was unscratched. In her paw was a little black box. My house mate Artie made this for me, so I won't loose my baby. Cleo explained as she stopped the mustang with the press of a button. Is Crazy ok? she asked nervously? I don't know Andre said sadly. The place was misty and murky. They are saw a round object heading toward them making strange sounds. Oh great another monster to kill. Cleo groaned. Andre took out a lighter that he borrowed from Cleo. He made a torch and was surprised to discover that the creature in fact was a rather large and round toad who was almost as big as Andre. Hi my name is Dr. Chuckles, and what are you all doing in my swamp? The toad said as he ate a bug that was passing by. Where is my buddy, Crazy? The toad asked looking around for his friend. He was in the cave when it collapsed. Cleo said sadly as she bent her head down in remebrence of Crazy's courage. We are sorry Andre said wiping away a tear. What happened to the fox? One of the moles asked as he was scratching his bum. I saw a fox jump down, with a BackStreet Boys CD, in his neck. He said his last words and perished over by the water. Dr. chuckles said quietly. Was he your friend? he asked. Cleo and Andre explained the whole story about the fox being a nazi. Oh well a giant butterfly ate his body. The toad said as he looked up at the worm hole. Just then someone came through the passage way. It was........................

[antireconciler]

... the real owner of the P-51. Man, this guy was ancient! Cleo ...

[ohnoaninfp]

walked over to the plane. This is mine Artie built it for me! Cleo explained, remembering the little genius calico cat boasting on her excellent job. She made one for the each of us. Cleo said, touching the wing of the plane. The one you took was princess's plane Cleo told George Bush. Oops I am sorry, when I get back to the white house I will buy you and that guy an airplane each. George Bush said apologetically. Don't bother Artie will make another one for princess, but it doesan't matter because Princess is too chicken to sit in the thing. Cleo said as she thanked Mr Bush. Hey! Andre yelled, offended by what Cleo said. Sorry Andre. You are a very brave chicken. Cleo said apologetically. Well what are we going to do now? How will we ever find Vector the evil chicken. Andre exclaimed frustrated that they were lost in a new realm. Did you say Vector? Dr. Chuckles asked. He is at the castle of Rottissere. He explained. How did you come to know that Andre? asked as a little hope came back to him. Well he..............................................

[KentOhio]

wanted to eat me. I peed on him. I also told him I was a toad and therefore poisonous. He didn't believe me and felt the need to peck me to make sure. After his tongue went numb, he believed. He then explained how he was mostly a cannibal anyway and asked me if I knew where there were any chickens. I told him to...

[antireconciler]

walk down the corridor to KFC. I go there all the time, myself. Geez, do I love chicken! ... No, don't worry Andre, I like my chicken fried with the crispy shakens! YEAH! I actually don't know how to prepare meat or anything, so I leave it to KFC. Besides, I don't want chicken blood all over my house, and killing is a little too violent for my tastes. Come, let's go get some lunch. JESUS FRICKEN CHRIST DO I NEED SOME CHICKEN RIGHT NOW!!! ... juicy, white tender meat ... with shakens! SHAKENS!!!"
By now Mr. Chuckles was shaking complulsivly from his fried chicken craving, and started hoping down the corridor with amazing speed, abandoning his company. Andre ...

[ohnoaninfp]

Cleo and the rest followed him. Andre was disgusted. Cleo you don't eat chicken do you? Andre asked nervously. Yep I am a carnivore you know. But don't worry I won't eat you. You are my friend, plus you are too frickin scrawny. Cleo laughed as they ran to catch Dr. Chuckles. The toad stopped at the KFC and got his food. Cleo got some fries, not wanting to offend Andre, plus he already promised her, that she can eat Vector the evil chicken. Excuse me but do you know where the Castle of Rotissere is? George Bush asked as he bit into his chicken sandwich. Andre waited out side. Cleo came out and brought him a salad, and talked with him, while Bush was trying to get directions to the castle. Yeah heres a map ,but you are not authorized to go there. One of the clerks said as he handed Bush the map. Riiiiight. Bush muttered to him self. Uh Thanks! Bush said happily realizing the clerks stupidity. With that every one met outside to begin the journey the the Castle of Rotissere. Andre can we bomb it? Please I want to bomb it . Please. Please Please. I haven't bombed anything recently and I would like very much to do a bombing run on the castle, if it is ok with miss Cleo that I borrow her plane. Bush begged Andre, hoping he would get to bomb the castle. You damn well, better take excellent care of my baby. I don't want any Nicks or scratches in him. Am I clear. Cleo growled, not wanting to let any one near her baby. I don't know Mr. Bush we will have to see what the situation is when we get there. Andre said softly. They all followed the map until they came to a very big and lush forest. They all saw...........................................

[antireconciler]

a very big and lush forest, just like the map said.
"Are we there yet?", Andre complained.
"'bout an hour, Andre", Cleo replied in monotone.
"But that's what you said an hour ago and the hour before that!"
"Andre! Look at the map! See the where it says 'very big and lush forest'?"
"Yeah ..."
"And where it says 'Castle Rotissere'?"
"Yeah ..."
"And how there not at the same spot?"
"I guess ... but, what does that have to with ..."
"WE'RE NOT THERE YET!!!", Cleo yelled, cutting Andre off.
Andre started pouting. Cleo ...

[KentOhio]

told Andre that if he really wanted to get there quickly, they could fly there in the P-51. After all, they had been towing it behind them on the ground this entire time. As soon as they found the nearest clearing, they all got in and Cleo tried to start it up. It sputtered and died. "My poor baby!" Cleo yelled.
Fortunately, Dr. Chuckles could help. "I'm not only a doctor; I'm also a mechanic," he said. "What we need to do to fix the engine is to...

[antireconciler]

( :rofl: )

narrow the problem down one step at a time, starting with the simplist. You might have just flooded it."

[ohnoaninfp]

plus the cockpit is too small to fit every body. Dr. Chuckles explained. I know I have an idea! Chuckles exclaimed! Well if anything happens to my baby I am having toad for supper. Cleo growled. Nothing will happen to your baby. Hold on I will be right back. Chuckles said as he began to hop away. They set up camp for the night and awaited his return. Just then they heard some airplanes flying in the sky. The aircraft landed. TO every ones amazement and horror, the two airplanes were German. One was a Focke-Wulfe, and the other one was a messershmitt 109. Those fuckin nazis never quit yelled Cleo as she pulled out a bazooka from the cockpit of her plane. Wait don't shoot! cried Dr. Chuckles as he and another toad, who was bumpier, climbed out of the planes. Every one this is my brother, Dr. Bumpy Bottoms. He is a dermatologist, but not a very good one because he keeps giving his patients warts. Chuckles told them. Whats the deal with the Luffwaffe planes? Cleo growled. Vector has an army based in the nazis, in fact they are neo nazis. The army consists of ferrets, foxes and evil little critters. That fox whose body was eaten by the butterfly was one of them. We shot down these too planes and I rebuilt them. They are good planes, but they were used for the wrong cause. Chuckles explained hoping that Cleo doesan't blow his headoff. OK then. Andre and Cleo got in to the P-51, while every one else squeezed in to the other two planes. They flew for a while, when they came to a....................................

[KentOhio]

fabulous airshow. They unwittingly found themselves as part of the spectacle. As the stunt planes flew around in loops, the P-51 and the former nazi planes stuck out like a sore thumb. Unless they performed stunts and tried to pass themselves off as part of the airshow, they might be recognized as unauthorized personnel and brought down. Communicating via radio, they told eachother which stunts to do, and how. It was a challenge, but they pulled it off, climbing, diving, spinning and rolling. Everyone on the ground cheered.
"I think we're going to have to land with the real planes, if we're going to avoid suspicion," radioed Dr. Bumpy Bottoms. The other two planes agreed. Landing with the others, they unexpectedly found themselves...

[ohnoaninfp]

In the middle of the field. People ran over. That was awesome! Can we have your autographs? One of them said. Cleo graciously signed autographs. Where did you learn to fly like that? Someone asked. I read a lot, pracitced, and one of my house mates helped me learn the mechanics of it. Cleo smiled. That was the first time Andre remembered her smiling. Well we got to do a bombing run. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms said cheerfully. A bombing run? A man asked concerned. Yeah a mock bombing run for another airshow. Goodbye every one it was a pleasure performing for you. Cleo shouted beaming with happiness. They all got back in to their planes and took off towards the castle. That was so awesome! I love doing stunts. Cleo said laughing. Yeah just please don't do anymore. Andre said, feeling naseous after the performance. They flew for a while. A storm was starting to blow in. They landed on a field and towed the planes behind them through another forest. What are we going to do? a little mole asked. They all found a large rock structure and took cover. Cleo built a fire and shared some food that she brought from the cockpit of her plane. What int the hell is that? Cleo asked as she noticed a dark figure coming towards them. I don't know, but can we bomb it? Bush asked. No. Cleo said softly looking through the rain at the thing. It was.............................

[antireconciler]

Andre.
"Why are you guys looking at me like that!? Can't I get a little privacy? Sheesh!"
"Oh, sorry Andre", Cleo apologized. Andre had said earlier he was going off to take a chicken piss. "I just thought you were a chickentrooper serving that evil chicken dude we're hunting down, here to kidnap Andre and make chicken tenders out of him"
"Surprize!", Andre exclaimed as he unziped an Andre-suit revealing that he was indead a chickentrooper here to kidnap Andre. "How 'bout a game of chicken, chickenshit?", the chickentrooper asked pointing to Cleo's right.
Cleo looked to her right to see Andre! Andre was staring right back at her with a stunned expression. "I got back 10 minutes ago, you bonehead! Jesus! I've been sitting here talking with you!"
"What?" Cleo didn't understand.
"JESUS!" Andre was shaking his head as the chickentrooper ...

[ohnoaninfp]

came in closer to the rock structure. Everyone out! he said pointing a laser gun at them as they all walked out. What is that? the evil nazi chicken said as he went in to the cave. Just then a they heard a loud sound and smelled something so awful that the began to vomit. The chicken trooper came out gasping for air. He died at Andre's feet. What in the hell was that, did he piss of a skunk or something, Cleo said plugging her nose. No it is way worse than a skunk. Man it stinks to high heaven. Just then Dr. Bumpy Bottoms hopped out of the structure. Woah! Sorry! My Bad. He said fanning the air. I have bad gas he said as he let out another. Criminy someone stick a plug in his butt or he will kill us all! Cleo yelled. Whoa! Who killed the nazi chicken? Bumpy Bottoms said as everyone gave him strange looks. What? He said as another toxic smell invaded their nostrils. Yuck! A sbd! Sickening! Andre said as he vomited again. Silent but deadly. Cleo groaned. Sorry. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms said as he lookdefor a bottle of beano. Here take this and go some where far away from us. Cleo said as she handed him a bottle of gas-x. He went far in to the woods. Just then thay all heard a deafening boom. The trees wilted and the flowers all died. The birds and the squirrels fell out of the trees. OK. I do not have gas any more. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms said as he hopped back. Geez! What the fuck did you eat? You destroyed a once beautiful forest and naseouated all of its inhabitants. Cleo groaned. I had a burrito that I got from Taco Bell three months ago. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms explained. Yeha the burrito from hell is more like it. They all realized it is time to press on before more nazi chickens come. They went to a ........................................

[ohnoaninfp]

came in closer to the rock structure. Everyone out! he said pointing a laser gun at them as they all walked out. What is that? the evil nazi chicken said as he went in to the cave. Just then a they heard a loud sound and smelled something so awful that the began to vomit. The chicken trooper came out gasping for air. He died at Andre's feet. What in the hell was that, did he piss of a skunk or something, Cleo said plugging her nose. No it is way worse than a skunk. Man it stinks to high heaven. Just then Dr. Bumpy Bottoms hopped out of the structure. Woah! Sorry! My Bad. He said fanning the air. I have bad gas he said as he let out another. Criminy someone stick a plug in his butt or he will kill us all! Cleo yelled. Whoa! Who killed the nazi chicken? Bumpy Bottoms said as everyone gave him strange looks. What? He said as another toxic smell invaded their nostrils. Yuck! A sbd! Sickening! Andre said as he vomited again. Silent but deadly. Cleo groaned. Sorry. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms said as he lookdefor a bottle of beano. Here take this and go some where far away from us. Cleo said as she handed him a bottle of gas-x. He went far in to the woods. Just then thay all heard a deafening boom. The trees wilted and the flowers all died. The birds and the squirrels fell out of the trees. OK. I do not have gas any more. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms said as he hopped back. Geez! What the fuck did you eat? You destroyed a once beautiful forest and naseouated all of its inhabitants. Cleo groaned. I had a burrito that I got from Taco Bell three months ago. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms explained. Yeha the burrito from hell is more like it. They all realized it is time to press on before more nazi chickens come. They went to a ........................................

[ohnoaninfp]

came in closer to the rock structure. Everyone out! he said pointing a laser gun at them as they all walked out. What is that? the evil nazi chicken said as he went in to the cave. Just then a they heard a loud sound and smelled something so awful that the began to vomit. The chicken trooper came out gasping for air. He died at Andre's feet. What in the hell was that, did he piss of a skunk or something, Cleo said plugging her nose. No it is way worse than a skunk. Man it stinks to high heaven. Just then Dr. Bumpy Bottoms hopped out of the structure. Woah! Sorry! My Bad. He said fanning the air. I have bad gas he said as he let out another. Criminy someone stick a plug in his butt or he will kill us all! Cleo yelled. Whoa! Who killed the nazi chicken? Bumpy Bottoms said as everyone gave him strange looks. What? He said as another toxic smell invaded their nostrils. Yuck! A sbd! Sickening! Andre said as he vomited again. Silent but deadly. Cleo groaned. Sorry. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms said as he lookdefor a bottle of beano. Here take this and go some where far away from us. Cleo said as she handed him a bottle of gas-x. He went far in to the woods. Just then thay all heard a deafening boom. The trees wilted and the flowers all died. The birds and the squirrels fell out of the trees. OK. I do not have gas any more. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms said as he hopped back. Geez! What the fuck did you eat? You destroyed a once beautiful forest and naseouated all of its inhabitants. Cleo groaned. I had a burrito that I got from Taco Bell three months ago. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms explained. Yeha the burrito from hell is more like it. They all realized it is time to press on before more nazi chickens come. They went to a ........................................

[ohnoaninfp]

came in closer to the rock structure. Everyone out! he said pointing a laser gun at them as they all walked out. What is that? the evil nazi chicken said as he went in to the cave. Just then a they heard a loud sound and smelled something so awful that the began to vomit. The chicken trooper came out gasping for air. He died at Andre's feet. What in the hell was that, did he piss of a skunk or something, Cleo said plugging her nose. No it is way worse than a skunk. Man it stinks to high heaven. Just then Dr. Bumpy Bottoms hopped out of the structure. Woah! Sorry! My Bad. He said fanning the air. I have bad gas he said as he let out another. Criminy someone stick a plug in his butt or he will kill us all! Cleo yelled. Whoa! Who killed the nazi chicken? Bumpy Bottoms said as everyone gave him strange looks. What? He said as another toxic smell invaded their nostrils. Yuck! A sbd! Sickening! Andre said as he vomited again. Silent but deadly. Cleo groaned. Sorry. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms said as he lookdefor a bottle of beano. Here take this and go some where far away from us. Cleo said as she handed him a bottle of gas-x. He went far in to the woods. Just then thay all heard a deafening boom. The trees wilted and the flowers all died. The birds and the squirrels fell out of the trees. OK. I do not have gas any more. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms said as he hopped back. Geez! What the fuck did you eat? You destroyed a once beautiful forest and naseouated all of its inhabitants. Cleo groaned. I had a burrito that I got from Taco Bell three months ago. Dr. Bumpy Bottoms explained. Yeha the burrito from hell is more like it. They all realized it is time to press on before more nazi chickens come. They went to a ........................................

[antireconciler]

small town nearby to stock up on gas-x, carefully avoiding the temporal anomoly in the middle of the road that they had fallen into three times now and had been teleported back in time just far enough to have to endure Bumpy Bottom's gas all over again. Once there, they hired the townsmen to chain up Bumpy Bottom and beat the remaining gas out of him with paddles so they wouldn't have to stop for gas-x again. They just couldn't carry that much. The townsmen, so deep in enemy territory, were likely to be sypathetic to the boss nazi chicken's cause, so everyone made sure to keep thier mouths shut. Andre had felt it best to not enter the town at all, so while everyone else was in town, he decided ...

[Avengardh]

...to go dirt-biking! Been ages since he tried it! Therefore he was looking forward to it if it wasn't for...

[KentOhio]

The hermit crabs, which looked like rocks. They were all over the place! In some areas, they were so dense that the whole ground seemed to be crawling. "I can't dirtbike over all these crabs!" Andre told himself. "However, seeing them gives me an idea. I can...

[antireconciler]

play hopscotch!"
Andre told the crabs the rules, and they quickly made a 100 foot long hopscotch court. After they were done, all the crabs lined up. Andre went first. He threw a shell, which landed on square 55, and started out.

[ohnoaninfp]

What in the hell are you doing? Cleo yelled. We have to get to the castle to finish your quest remember? She said staring at Andre in dibelief. Oh sorry. Andre said as he came to his senses. We got all of the supplies we need Bush said as he walked over to them. Good lets get going Cleo said as she licked her paw. They walked out of the town and soon found themselves in a giant field of sunflowers. This is so cool Dr. Bumpy Bottoms said relieved that he was gas free. They all traveled along in the cool shade of the sunflowers. The were being followed by.............

[KentOhio]

the Dreaded Vampire Butterflies! As beautiful as they were, they were still potentially deadly. These mutant butterflies had long ago grown weary of boring old nectar. They needed something more, and they found it in blood. Dreaded Vampire Butterflies, or DVB's, have been known to suck cows dry without leaving any visible incisions. Unfortunately, none of the gang knew this. As the butterflies landed on her, Cleo made remarks about how gorgeous they looked. It was exactly then that..........

[antireconciler]

Cleo suddenly straightened and spewed a bunch of monotonous nonsense in rapid succession. She stood frozen for about a minute, while everone tried to get Cleo to come to her senses. Just as suddenly, she started moving again.
"Food aquired. Return to colony." she said in a foreign voice and started walking away, despite the team's protests.
"Hey, how come there's a pretty butterfly stuck to the back of Cleo's neck?", Andre asked.
Chuckles shrugged. "We better get going. Cleo will catch up when shes done eating or whatever."
"Yeah, I guess you're right, but why was she talking about a colony?."
"Colony is a city, dude."
"Colony's the opposite direction!"
"Well, Colony's claim to fame is it's tuna export, so it's understandable she would want to go there."
Suddenly, Andre realized ...

[ohnoaninfp]

The colony that Cleo was talking about was the DVB's colony. They were going to eat her! We have to save her! Andre said as he watched her walk farther from them. They ran to Cleo. Andre snatched and ate the butterfly that was on her neck. Mmmm. Delicious he said licking his beak. Cleo came to her senses. The butterflies were enraged and started to chase Andre and the others as they ran from the evil winged creatures. What are we going to do? Andre asked as he ran. I know! Cleo said as they appraoched the planes. She climbed in to her plane and pulled out a quesadilla. Here eat this now! She said to Dr. Bumpy Bottoms. They all, except for Bumpy Bottims hid in the planes. Then they all heard it. Ahuge explosion that made the planes shake. The vampire butterflies all fell out of the sky and died. Mmmm delicious can I have another one. The bumpy bottomed Dr. said, as Cleo ran out and gave him a Gas-x pill. No take this quickly. She said holding her little nose. They all began to walk towards their destination once again. They walked until they got to another swamp. They decided to camp there for the night when.............................................

[KentOhio]

It ended up being more than a one-night stay. In fact, they stayed for 18 days without doing anything much at all.
"I just don't see the point anymore," Andre lamented. "What's the point? Why are we here? What's the purpose of life?" He and all the rest were sliding into a dangerous state of depression, or, at least, apathy. There were days when they would not even get up out of bed.
"No one cares what we do. It won't matter to anyone if we go kill nazis or battle monsters or not. We might as well not even be alive."
Then,

[ohnoaninfp]

Cleo's depression turned into to rage. Why are we just sitting here? We have to go kill the evil nazi chicken!!!!! Cleo creid out as she got into her plane and pulled out a prescription bottle. Here everyone take one of these. She said as she gave every one a zoloft. Every one came to their senses. We have to get out of this depressing swamp! Andre yelled realizing it was the swamps atmosphere that was making them depressed. They all got into the planes and flew out of there. They crossed some purple misty mountains as well as some farm land. Then it happened! They were out of fuel. They landed the planes gently in to a valley. Dammit! We are almost to the castle! It is right over the mountains! Cleo growled. Bumpy Bottoms and Dr. Cuddles shook their heads as they realized that they too, were out of fuel. Then They all heard a voice over Cleo's radio. Cleo come in. What is your position? The voice asked concerned. Oh shit! Artie has been trying to message me, but I had my rock music up too loud. Cleo said as she went over to her plane. She gave their postion to the person. Cleo noticed whining in the back round. Man! Why in the hell, did she bring her for. Cleo growled frustrated. Bring who? Andre asked as a spitfire landed by the planes. Out jumped a short hair Calico, followed by a black and white, fluffy cat. Princess! How many times do I have to tell you not to puke in the planes! Artie yelled as she walked over to the group. Well you are out of fuel aren't you? The calico said smugly. Yes Artie we are. Cleo said annoyed, but relieved that help had come. Don't worry I will make some fuel with Dr. Bumpy Bottoms help. Artie said as she walked over to him. Sir, word of your flateunce has spread afar. She said bowing. Princess stood in by Andre sniffing him. Is this the chicken we are going to eat? Princess said licking her chops. No we are still on the way to the castle. By the way, how did you hear of our quest.? Cleo asked. You had the intercom button pushed down when you guys where talking about it. So we came to join you guys and get some delicious chicken. Artie said. All right everyone, take cover! I am going to make us some fuel. The little Calico ordered as she put on a gas mask. Everyone ran for cover. A minute later there was the big boom. Artie tried to make the fuel without puking. A half an hour later Artie announced that the fuel was ready. She put the fuel into the planes. We even have extra! Artie exclaimed, realizing she wouldn't have to do that for a while. All right everyone lets go. Cleo ordered as she thanked artie. Princess. come on. Get in the plane. Artie called to her. At the word plane Princess pissed. I am afraid of that thing she cried. I don't want to get in it again. Princess whined as she finished peeing. Look you putty brained moron you wanted to come so get your flffy keister in the plane! Artie yelled baring her teeth. Princess relunctantly got in the spitfire. Then they were off. The passed over the mountains and saw the evil city. In the center their was a huge castle. It was................................

[Aryan]

Suddenly from nowhere came a person wearing a T-shirt with the word INTP written on it .
The person said, "Behold the INTP has arrived ...

[Lucas]

"I am the king of this evil city we call Phoenix, I have been looking for you for years, I have something very important to tell you," the INTP said until he was interupted by a ringing payphone on the corner. He ran to the phone, picked it up, and his body digitally melted into the phone like in the matrix.

Then a giant blue......

[KentOhio]

helicopter arrived and hovered above them. over a loudspeaker, the pilot said, "I am addressing the INTP, whom we have been tracking. I know you are down there. You do not conform to our society. We can help you. Turn yourself in, and we will give you the extroversion shot. Your life will be greatly improved. It is in your best interest to receive the injection. You are one of the last hold-outs. Everyone else has already gotten it, and is much better off because of it. Don't be stubborn."

[jimkopelli]

"Damn, we lost him. He's a shifty little bugger."
With that, they flew off, leaving a thick cloud of orange smoke behind. Cleo and the rest of the people who were so rudely interrupted, yet were in a post long enough to discourage people from reading it sat there wondering what would happen next. The cloud of smoke started drifting lower...

[KentOhio]

until it engulfed Andre, Cleo, and the rest.
"Mmmm, cinnamon!" Andre exclaimed happily.
They all delighted in the scent, not noticing that Cleo was on the ground struggling to breathe. Finally Andre looked down; "Cleo! What's wrong?"
"OH NO!" Exclaimed Artie, "She's allergic to cinnamon!"
So,

[ohnoaninfp]

They all picked her up and put her in her plane. Lets fly out of here Dr. Bumpy Bottoms yelled. They got into the planes and were up in to the air. They flew toward the castle. Suddenly someone transmited something in German. They want to know what we are up to. said Dr. Cuddles as his brother transmitted a message back to the nazi chickens. What did he say? Andre asked, not understanding German. He told them that we have taken you, Cleo, Artie and the pisspot(Princess), as captives. This will be our way in. Once we are in the castle we can take them by surprise. They flew a hangar that was connected to the castle. As they were getting out of the planes, Dr. Cuddles handed them handcuffs. Here. Pretend that you are our prisoners. Cuddles explained. Cleo get all of the ammunition you need. Cleo and the others smuggled the weapons in. Where did you find these rejects, a nazi chicken sneered. We captured them outside the city, trying to attack the castle. Bumpy Bottoms said calmly. Good work soldier. Bring them to Vector. He has plans for them, exspecially this one. The guard said pointing to Andre. Princess started to cry. I want to go home. Waah! She wailed. Quieet you fluff ball, or we will not get out of here alive. Cuddles said harshly. They came to the throne room and there was Vector sitting on a golden throne that was covered in jewels. Well, well, well, Look at who we have here. Andre the puny little weakling that flunked my gym class. Vector sneered as Andre glared at him. You flunked gym? How in the fuck can you flunk gym? Cleo said surprised. Silence! Vector yelled as he looked at Cleo. Suddenly his face got very pale. He began to tremble immensely. How can it be. Andre has brought my death. How can this puny little chicken bring something I have feared for years. Vector said shaking. What is he talking about? Said one of the little moles. It is the kitten of Doom! She has come to claim me! Vector yelled as he pointed to Cleo. It has been prophosized by the little green marble, That the Doom Kitten would come and eat me. Vector said as he turned white. Everyone looked at Cleo, surprised about the news they just heard. I am the Doom Kitten! Cool! Cleo laughed. What in the hell are you looking at? She asked annoyed that her friends were staring at her.

[KentOhio]

Vector went on to say, "Because of the prophesy, I have been preparing for this day. Yes, the time has finally come to put my plan into action." With that, he stood up and pressed a big red button. "Haha, say your prayers, doom kitten! In a few seconds, a 16-ton weight will drop from my ceiling and crush you to death. And that's American tons, not British tons! Hahahaha.... [splat.]
Yes, someone did get crushed and killed. Unfortunately for Vector, it was him. He had neglected to put an "X" on the spot underneath the weight, and being farsighted didn't help either. Didn't he know they made glasses for chickens? Apparently not.
Vector's top officials were at first stunned, then came to their senses. "We're free from his tyranny! Free!" they shouted.
That night, there was a celebration and feast. All of the nazis denounced their former views and befriended the group. And Cleo ate Vector's baked body.

[ohnoaninfp]

While the others were enjoying themselves thinking that the journey was over. Afox crept in and stole one of the bones from Vectors carcass. Iwill regenerate him just like he regenerated me. The fox sneered. The stupid fools thinking I was dead when I fell through the worm hole with the shard in me. The fox laughed evily.He put the bone in to some sort of mechanism. This will regenerate you master. The fox said smiling. About a half an hour later Vector was regenerated. What happened. He asked as he noticed he wasn't in his throne room. You died and I brought you back said the fox laughing. We will take over this realm and then the other realms! Vector said laughing evily. They didn't see the little chipmunk that was hiding in the shadows. The little creature called Barney ran upstairs and reported to the good guys what happened. Cleo, Andre and the others got ready to fight. Vector walked in to the room. When the evil nazi critters saw him alive they went back on his side. Soon everyone was fighting to the death. Freeze Andre you miserable excuse for a chicken! Vector said pointing a gun to Andre's temple. I have so wanted to do this in a long while. Just then a P40 warhawk came crashing through. It knocked the gun out of Vector's wing and crashed into the wall. Boy, for once, I am glad to see her. Cleo said as a brown tiger striped cat and a very large grey and white cat climbed out. Where in the Hell did you learn to fly Diana?!?!. The fluffy grey and white cat said angrily. Diana laughed maniacally and drooled. Cleo quickly explained the story to Chloe and Diana as she fought off the evil nazi critters. Just then they heard a loud squeak. The chipmunk that had helped them had been fatally stabbed. Andre knelt by him. Is there any thing we can do? He asked concerned. The only way to defeat him is to..................... The chipmunks voice trailed off as he died. You bastard Andre yelled as he charged at Vector.

[Star Cannon]

And vector exploded into thousands of tiny glass shards. Andre stopped in bewilderment as the shards of glass imbedded themselves into his feathers. For a chicken he was pretty tough. He squawked, "What happened?" Chloe and Cleo stared. Everyone then turned around to the sound of insane laughter -- a figment of an imagination -- purple symbols surrounded them and then they all became aware of the nature of the universe: It was not real. They all stopped, wondered, and went back to fighting. Everyone except for Andre. He was too busy ridding himself of the glass to care for the revelation that they all received.

[ohnoaninfp]

They were getting tired rfom battle. Andre! Just kill that bastard! Quit fooling around! Cleo snarled as she recieved a scratch on her nose. Andre and the real Vector were dueling it out. Andre backed Vector on to the side of the throne. Diana, who was sleeping peacefully on the throne, woke up, turned and looked at Vector. She began to drool. A drop of drool fell on Vectors arm. Ahhhh!!!!!! It burns!!!!!!!!! Vector screamed as he watched the stuff form a hole in his skin. Diana jumped down from the throne with drool dangling from her mouth. She slobbered on the floor. The drool had formed a wormhole in to the floor. Just as Andre was about to kill Vector, Vector slashed him on the shoulder and jumped in the worm hole. The worm hole closed as the spittle dried. Everyone stopped fighting and stared.

[Claverhouse]

PLACE-HOLDER FOR CLASSICS STATUS