Ideal Romantic Partner Poll for INTPs (Revised)

[MacGuffin]

Yes, it is iNtuitive biased. Tough. (For the record I am married to an SJ).

We are talking theory here. We all know individuality trumps any MBTI type. So this is not what you have done, or would like to do with certain individuals. THEORY.

Non-INTPs can vote, just be sure you are voting for the ideal romantic partner for INTPs, not your own type.

[MacGuffin]

Base off this original poll/thread (http://forums.intpcentral.com/showthread.php?t=15596).

Once again INFJ, theoretically, IMHO:


I am of the belief that you want some difference in type, but probably no more than two preferences, otherwise you have a hard time relating.

E - probably drive you crazy. STFU!

S - most important difference I think. A lot easier with an N (same worldview).

F - probably want someone in a romantic relationship to be an F.

J - as long as they don't nag you about it, not a bad idea for someone to remember dates and get bills paid.

End result: INFJ

[Dr. Haight]

I don't know how I voted last time. But I am going with INTJ at this moment in time.

[MacGuffin]

I don't know how I voted last time. But I am going with INTJ at this moment in time.
The Howling Void of Nothingness.

I can dig that.

[C.J.Woolf]

So the poll is about theory, eh? Is a theoretically happy relationship like the theoretically non-flying bumblebee?

/me votes for INTP again.


The Howling Void of Nothingness.

I can dig that.
That's "Dryly Sarcastic Void of Nothingness" to you, bud.

[MacGuffin]

/me votes for INTP again.
If you had an twin sister, would you marry her? Just curious. Luke and Leia seemed to have something going on there for a little while...

[littlelostnf]

I have to say (not because I am one) but ENFJ. However a very balanced one. Just enough of the E and the J to not drive an IntP crazy. A nice healthy N and just enough F. After all our prefs are reversed

INTP

Ti
Ne
Si
Fe

ENFJ

Fe
Ni
Se
Ti

How much better can you get ;)

[Dr. Haight]

How much better can you get ;)That depends. Post a picture and I shall elaborate.

[C.J.Woolf]

If you had an twin sister, would you marry her? Just curious. Luke and Leia seemed to have something going on there for a little while...
If I met someone who was like a long-list twin sister and I wasn't already married, I'd consider it. 'Cause I like myself that much.

That goes double if she likes the same games I like.

What say you? Is another INTP too much of a good thing to you, or do INTPs (including yourself?) bug you, or what?

[MacGuffin]

I have to say (not because I am one) but ENFJ. However a very balanced one. Just enough of the E and the J to not drive an IntP crazy. A nice healthy N and just enough F. After all our prefs are reversed

INTP

Ti
Ne
Si
Fe

ENFJ

Fe
Ni
Se
Ti

How much better can you get ;)
Hmm, I never thought of it that way. Interesting. I am worried just sharing the N though.

Oh, and do what the Dr. orders.

[Spirit]

Theoretically? Okay, you forgot an option

NONE

:p

INTJ? A brick wall would probably be less rigid... (no offense intended)
INFJ? Like to play around, defty food for INTP paranoia... (again, no offense intended)

I don't think there's an ideal partner for an INTP because while the INTP can find many types interesting to analyze (especially the distant ones), things would get nasty routine soon and there's not many types that can put up with an INTP's quirkiness. But most important: healthy INTPs dont really NEED one :p

[FranG]

I said ENFJ. I think (theoretically of course) that NT and NF pairings work really nice together. I said ENFJ because of the extravertedness and the scheduling, which is what we INTPs don't have.

[MacGuffin]

What say you? Is another INTP too much of a good thing to you, or do INTPs (including yourself?) bug you, or what?
Seriously, I worry about blind spots. Kind of nice putting my SJ in charge of stuff when I don't give enough of a damn.

I mean, I like INTPs. A lot. Especially female INTPs. Even as bitchy as they can be at times (http://forums.intpcentral.com/showthread.php?p=474492#post474492). :devil:

[MacGuffin]

Theoretically? Okay, you forgot an option

NONE

:p

INTJ? A brick wall would probably be less rigid... (no offense intended)
INFJ? Like to play around, defty food for INTP paranoia... (again, no offense intended)

I don't think there's an ideal partner for an INTP because while the INTP can find many types interesting to analyze (especially the distant ones), things would get nasty routine soon and there's not many types that can put up with an INTP's quirkiness. But most important: healthy INTPs dont really NEED one :p
No dammit. Pick one! Whether an INTP needs a partner at all is another thread!

[Spirit]

No dammit. Pick one! Whether an INTP needs a partner at all is another thread!

My INTP answer is: I'd like to keep my options open :p

[MacGuffin]

My INTP answer is: I'd like to keep my options open :p
See C.J.? Put up with this?

This is why I hate to put "abstain/hate this poll/none of the above" for a poll option!

[cafe]

INFJ? Like to play around, defty food for INTP paranoia... (again, no offense intended)
Could you clarify what you mean by "play around"?

[Spirit]

Could you clarify what you mean by "play around"?

Playful can be good or bad, depending on whether its intended to compromise the other or not.

[C.J.Woolf]

Seriously, I worry about blind spots. Kind of nice putting my SJ in charge of stuff when I don't give enough of a damn.True, but better still to address your blind spots and not use your partner as a crutch. Besides, people are good at seeing faults in others that they don't see in themselves, even when they're the same faults. Maybe especially.

I keep up the necro-equine flogging for INTP-INTP partly because they do have the same faults. Mrs. Woolf and I are both hard to live with, but we're hard to live with in the same way. That means it's easy for us to live with each other.


I mean, I like INTPs. A lot. Especially female INTPs. Even as bitchy as they can be at times (http://forums.intpcentral.com/showthread.php?p=474492#post474492). :devil:
Heh. You totally had that coming.

[littlelostnf]

I think an NT NF pairing is just what the dr. ordered. Sharing the n is what for me is most important. i need someone who won't get frustrated at my thoughts or where they take me. i would expect an nt to be right out there with me. and he could quiet my F if it's taking me to far...and I could soften the edges of his T if they were getting to sharp. I could rejoice in his P when I was feeling stressed and I could lend him my J when he needed some order...I think the E and I is overrated....any halfway balanced person knows when to speak and when to listen and if they've trained themselves to do the opposite of their preference when needed...how great is that.

[Dr. Haight]

INTJ? A brick wall would probably be less rigid... (no offense intended)
Look, all I am saying is that four out of five of my long-time friends are INTJs. We get along very, very well. If it were not for the fact that three of them are male, and the other is married, I could see the relationships going another step beyond friendship. And, I view that as being much better then the other given possibilities. I would prefer to sit around and ponder the possibility, and strategic implementation, for establishing a socialistic INTX society on the moon with a like-minded thinker, with a complete disregard to reality - even if that means the house has to stay clean and stuff has to be completed to maintain a stress-free environment.

[MacGuffin]

Heh. You totally had that coming.
Female-INTP-apologist!

[s0978]

this new thread is still stupid.

but, meh, I voted. entj. Te & Ni, goes well with Ti & Ne. gah, so stupid.

[MacGuffin]

this new thread is still stupid.

but, meh, I voted. entj. Te & Ni, goes well with Ti & Ne. gah, so stupid.
The Commandant? Nice choice.

[Spirit]

I would prefer to sit around and ponder the possibility, and strategic implementation, for establishing a socialistic INTX society on the moon with a like-minded thinker, with a complete disregard to reality

Well, that sounds very much worth pondering ;)

I see where you're coming from, but in a relationship I see the danger of any "S", "J", "E" or "F" (the more together, the worse) wrecking havoc with your mind and identity as a problem, even though someone providing for you in terms of everyday stuff is certainly worth considering.

[cafe]

Playful can be good or bad, depending on whether its intended to compromise the other or not.
Gotcha. Malice is always bad in a partner, regardless of type, I'd think.









(s?)He called us playful. :banana:

[cafe]

Look, all I am saying is that four out of five of my long-time friends are INTJs. We get along very, very well. If it were not for the fact that three of them are male, and the other is married, I could see the relationships going another step beyond friendship. And, I view that as being much better then the other given possibilities. I would prefer to sit around and ponder the possibility, and strategic implementation, for establishing a socialistic INTX society on the moon with a like-minded thinker, with a complete disregard to reality - even if that means the house has to stay clean and stuff has to be completed to maintain a stress-free environment.
I don't think INJs are necessarily particularly rigid about the house being cleaned and stuff.

[Jennywocky]

Look, all I am saying is that four out of five of my long-time friends are INTJs. We get along very, very well. If it were not for the fact that three of them are male, and the other is married, I could see the relationships going another step beyond friendship.

Probably depends on specifics, history, etc.

My INTP friend is married to an INTJ. He loves her to death, and they connect on a lot of levels... but she's had some real anger issues and has been very difficult for him to deal with.

Funny how, compared to an INTJ, sometimes an INTP can look like a bleeding heart.

[Dr. Haight]

She's an F. Position validated.

[FranG]

Look, all I am saying is that four out of five of my long-time friends are INTJs.

This comment is wierd to me. It seems like a lot of people on this board know quite a few Ns, despite they being so rare. I rarely ever run across a N and I definitely only know a few (I can probably count them on one hand).

[Spirit]

^^ You are not alone. I don't even have five long-term friends, whatever type. ;)

[Dr. Haight]

This comment is weird to me. It seems like a lot of people on this board know quite a few Ns, despite they being so rare. I rarely ever run across a N and I definitely only know a few (I can probably count them on one hand).Personally, I believe that is based on my exposure to a lot of folks a two major research universities, over the course of eleven years. NT's like academia, and finishing stuff - hence, I believe, the possibility of running into INTJs increases in certain environments, especially if you knew what you liked and what signs to look for.

Finding INTJ/Ps in real life is good sport. Sort of like bird-spotting, but slightly different.


^^ You are not alone. I don't even have five long-term friends, whatever type. ;)I suspected that - which is my point, by the way.

[geniusndisguise]

Finding INTJ/Ps in real life is good sport. Sort of like bird-spotting, but slightly different.


Sounds like fun. Who approaches who?

[Spirit]

Finding INTJ/Ps in real life is good sport. Sort of like bird-spotting, but slightly different.

I suspected that - which is my point, by the way.

Your point - that you need to know enough INTJ's to pass judgment? In the end, in a relationship, it ALWAYS depends on the individual constellation, of course, yet we're talking theory here anyway, aren't we? I knew an INTJ who was VERY anal about things, I grew up with Js annoying me with their rigidness, and together with the MBTI description, I thought I could not like that in someone who's supposed to be close and spend alot of time with you, because that inevitably seems to result in the other restricting you and imposing his plans and schedules on you. Then again, there are many WORSE choices in the MBTI spectrum, granted.

[MacGuffin]

Woah, woah! Who is voting for the ENTJ Commandant?!? Show yourselves!

[geniusndisguise]

I - could be a nice quiet accord, or could result in communication issues

E - without understanding could be annoying, or could keep me from becoming the recluse that could be my natural tendency

I get along pretty well with E's as long as they know when to shut up. Some I's and I tend to have nothing to talk about. It's a strain to get to know them.

S/N - I would never date another S. It's like apples and oranges IMO.

T - could easily understand and appreciate each other

F - I'm not a strong T so I think I understand F. As long as they aren't Super F (unhealthily) like some people in my family.

J - they can't understand me. I'm super P (unhealthily). :ph34r:
P - we'd live in complete chaos
(Obviously, I know I need to do some work on myself in this area.)

So, um, NP is as close as I can get. I can't vote (objectively). :cry:

[nottaprettygal]

I think many of you have an unhealthy fear of Js. A weak to moderate J would do a P type a lot of good, in my opinion. Of course we all know crazy Js that scare the hell of of us (myself included) with their intense rigidity, but they are the exception, not the rule.

I narrowed it down to INTJ and INFJ, but I'll go with INFJ because I can't imagine an INTJ being the ideal in any sort of romantic relationship.

[file cabinet]

I logged in just to vote ENFJ. go ENFJ!

[littlelostnf]

I take back what I said in your case. If your a hot female with an amazing body, lets get together for a while. Until we both get bored and then we can just peace.

Um I don't think so. As much as I love INTP's you sound like the exception to that... I don't know about the enfj's you've known but we're not moody, def not whiney and certainly not looking for a man who is looking for a hot female with an amazing body who wants to just fool around. You must be thinking SP's perhaps. I take that back...you just must be dreamin.

[geniusndisguise]

I think many of you have an unhealthy fear of Js. A weak to moderate J would do a P type a lot of good, in my opinion. Of course we all know crazy Js that scare the hell of of us (myself included) with their intense rigidity, but they are the exception, not the rule.


I do have an unhealthy fear of J's, but it's nothing against them. Honestly, I just think I drive J's absolutely insane.

[MacGuffin]

Js are fine. Just give them stuff* to organize/control.










*MAKE SURE IT IS NOT YOU.

[abathur]

Um I don't think so. As much as I love INTP's you sound like the exception to that... I don't know about the enfj's you've known but we're not moody, def not whiney and certainly not looking for a man who is looking for a hot female with an amazing body who wants to just fool around. You must be thinking SP's perhaps. I take that back...you just must be dreamin.

owned.

[nottaprettygal]

Js are fine. Just give them stuff* to organize/control.

*MAKE SURE IT IS NOT YOU.

Heh. The ExxJs have a greater desire to control others. I don't think that IxxJs feel that desire quite as much.

[MacGuffin]

Heh. The ExxJs have a greater desire to control others. I don't think that IxxJs feel that desire quite as much.
Yes, but you have to be sure that you don't give them the opportunity.

[s0978]

Look, all I am saying is that four out of five of my long-time friends are INTJs. We get along very, very well. If it were not for the fact that three of them are male, and the other is married, I could see the relationships going another step beyond friendship. And, I view that as being much better then the other given possibilities.
ok, I think we need to know what type the missus is now.

[littlelostnf]

As a weak to moderate J I think I do P's pretty well. I've never had a problem with my P friends. I think when it starts to bug me that they are not organized or keeping their options open to long (for me) I just do what I want and don't worry about them. I had an INFP roommate who was wonderful. We were an awesome pair. When she would leave things around and tick off my (need to be orderly) I would remember that's not her strength and either deal with it myself or if it was THAT bad (and it never was) I'd witch and moan about it outloud to myself (if that makes sense) and be fine with it by the time she got home. Boyfriend that was a P. Was always late...but then again was always there when I needed him. Fantastic listening skills and truly let his Fe work for him when he needed to. Must have had one heck of a cool XXFJ in his life.

[littlelostnf]

I beg to differ. The IXXJ's might be quiet about it but they so much like to have control. They like to know everything and want to control more. The EXXJ's generally don't ness want to know everything it's just that everyone tells them everything...and as for controling. Generally they are more than happy to let (well the SJ's and NJ's) someone else do the steering.

[Oculus Sinister]

Um I don't think so. As much as I love INTP's you sound like the exception to that... I don't know about the enfj's you've known but we're not moody, def not whiney and certainly not looking for a man who is looking for a hot female with an amazing body who wants to just fool around. You must be thinking SP's perhaps. I take that back...you just must be dreamin.

Do you deny that you go for people you are attracted to? Sorry, call me a realist because I do.

[Spirit]

Yes, but you have to be sure that you don't give them the opportunity.

And this sort of defending/trying to hold your ground/tactical acting (what kind of adverse reaction could my next action have?) is exactly what I can do without with in a relationship - rather stay without one in that case ;)

[littlelostnf]

owned. maybe that's the problem.

[littlelostnf]

Do you deny that you go for people you are attracted to? Sorry, call me a realist because I do.

huh?

[Melody]

ill say it infinity 9 times if i have to

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ENFJ MOTHERFUCKERS!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

and welcome, lostnf. like, no ENFJ's visit here. =( theyre too busy saving the world and being charismatic. it's great when they stop by

WE NEED MORE

[abathur]

owned. maybe that's the problem.

?

[FranG]

ill say it infinity 9 times if i have to

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ENFJ MOTHERFUCKERS!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

and welcome, lostnf. like, no ENFJ's visit here. =( theyre too busy saving the world and being charismatic. it's great when they stop by

WE NEED MORE

.

[cafe]

I went ahead and voted INFJ (even though I don't really think there's an ideal mate for any type) because I've never come across a couple better matched than my INTP and I, though I have come across some couples that are equally well matched as far as I can tell.

The P/J conflict took us a few years to work out and we would be better off if we could hire an SJ to take care of us, but we get along very well nearly effortlessly and always have.

But it really all comes down to what the individual INTP wants in a partner and what faults they find most tolerable and vice-versa.

[littlelostnf]

First thanks...I found myself in a chat with some intps the other night and so made my way to this site the next day. As for the enfj's never stopping by...I think the statistics are wrong. I think enfj's are the rarest...or like you said the busiest. I've yet to meet an enfj to round off the fingers on my one hand. I know (besides myself) 1 other enfj. All my other NF friends are infj's know 3 of those enfp's know 6 of those and infp's know 3 of them. I think someone in the posts above who said it's about the right places to meet them...they are right however in my case. The nf's I met have been by chance or they were always friends and tested nf. The nt's I know are either family (a cousin and his son, intp and intj) friends three intps, (male) and a workmate intp (female). I met none of them in academia unless you want to call the female intp meeting academia as we both work for a special needs school. I as a teacher and she as an administrator for an offshoot program of the schoool.

[ajblaise]

I can't believe some of you can pick an ideal.

5 way tie: INTP - ENTP - ENTJ - INFJ - INFP

[Ellis]

All I know is that, from personal experience, ESTP is a bad idea. Lays on the charisma way too thick, and can be manipulative and controlling despite their personal urge for autonomy and independence. Very frustrating, especially since INTPs aren't exactly bleeding-heart martyrs.

INTJs make for excellent friends, but someone needs to be the passionate one in a romantic relationship. :P

[Colonel Panic]

I voted ENFJ:

-E because SOMEONE needs to have the balls to approach the other.
-I have always seen NFs and NTs seem to compliment each other well when they aren't driving each other crazy
-J because as mentioned earlier, SOMEone has to remember to pay the bills.

[Dr. Haight]

ok, I think we need to know what type the missus is now.The anti-INTP type.

[MacGuffin]

I voted ENFJ:

-E because SOMEONE needs to have the balls to approach the other.
-I have always seen NFs and NTs seem to compliment each other well when they aren't driving each other crazy
-J because as mentioned earlier, SOMEone has to remember to pay the bills.
Yeah, but assuming someone approaches the other (and yes, two introverts often get together), what do you need the E for then?

[Geoff]

Yeah, but assuming someone approaches the other (and yes, two introverts often get together), what do you need the E for then?

Two I's lead to a very isolated lifestyle.. an E can bring the other out of their shell, provide a ready source of external contact. There are frictions in either pairing I-I or E-I, but E-I does "match" opposite strengths.

-Geoff

[NightCrawler]

I think any most one or two-offs are good. 3 or 4... worse.

INFJ, INTJ, ENFP, ENTJ

[MacGuffin]

Two I's lead to a very isolated lifestyle.. an E can bring the other out of their shell, provide a ready source of external contact. There are frictions in either pairing I-I or E-I, but E-I does "match" opposite strengths.

-Geoff
Then why had no one voted for the wuvable ENTP yet?

[AMDG]

I voted ENTJ, but I'm thinking lately an ESTJ might be kinda cool. Increases the probability of them just leaving me the fuck alone as long as I'm not doing anything wrong.

[booyalab]

Woah, woah! Who is voting for the ENTJ Commandant?!? Show yourselves!

i think i was the first. I mainly picked ENTJ with INTP women in mind-
1. similarities in the right parts: intellect, insight
2. differences in the right parts: more confident, more organized

INTP men should probably be with NFs, your dispositions are too frail to handle another T

[Dr. Haight]

INTP men should probably be with NFs, your dispositions are too frail to handle another TBlasphemy!

I prefer to be around people that I can learn from, and hence, more knowledgeable than I. (Damn that's a horrible sentence. But you get the point.)

[AMDG]

Blasphemy!

I prefer to be around people that I can learn from, and hence, more knowledgeable than I. (Damn that's a horrible sentence. But you get the point.)

I do too, but I know there are so many different types of knowledge that don't come out of books - and those are the ones I'm least likely to learn by myself.

[booyalab]

Blasphemy!

I prefer to be around people that I can learn from, and hence, more knowledgeable than I. (Damn that's a horrible sentence. But you get the point.)

and who are you with? :D

[Dr. Haight]

and who are you with? :DI was pretty ignorant back then. :huh:

By the way, it just dawned on me that I had a dream about you last night, and in the dream, you wouldn't tell me your real name. So very, very cruel... and controlling. So very cruel and controlling.

[Rajah]

My ideal is an INTP who loves to clean house.

MUST be an NP.

[Dr. Haight]

My ideal is an INTP who loves to clean house.
Well... I wouldn't use the word "love," but it gets done. I usually crank the TV volume up and listen to what I recorded off of CSPAN-2's book TV show over the previous weekend. :reading: ... it keeps my mind off the task.

[MacGuffin]

If you have the money, just hire someone to clean the house.

[attila_the_hunny]

I picked INFJ, because a lot of my dude friends are INFJs and we get a long very well, and compliment each other. I always have difficulty with dating INTJs.

[MacGuffin]

I picked INFJ, because a lot of my dude friends are INFJs and we get a long very well, and compliment each other. I always have difficulty with dating INTJs.
What happened?

[attila_the_hunny]

What happened?

Nothing...yet. They're just difficult. Every one I date thinks they're Superman or something--taking care of everyone, but forgetting their partner exists.

Maybe I should have more problems or something.

[nottaprettygal]

Nothing...yet. They're just difficult. Every one I date thinks they're Superman or something--taking care of everyone, but forgetting their partner exists.

Maybe I should have more problems or something.

I never really thought INTJs were the "take care of everyone" type. Usually they don't really give a damn about anyone.

(Hope things work out for you.)

[attila_the_hunny]

I never really thought INTJs were the "take care of everyone" type. Usually they don't really give a damn about anyone.

(Hope things work out for you.)

If it's they're family, they do. Everyone else they don't give a damn about.

[MacGuffin]

If it's they're family, they do. Everyone else they don't give a damn about.
Become family?

[attila_the_hunny]

Become family?

I am for the most part. I just don't have any problems I can't take care of [apparently everyone else can't take care of any of their problems], and am therefore not a priority.

[Rajah]

If you have the money, just hire someone to clean the house.I'd have to clean the house before I'd let anyone in to clean the house.



Edit - I find it interesting NJs are winning out over NPs...

[MacGuffin]

I'd have to clean the house before I'd let anyone in to clean the house.
Don't J out on us now.


Edit - I find it interesting NJs are winning out over NPs...
See? The rest of us DON'T want to clean.

[Rajah]

Don't J out on us now.


See? The rest of us DON'T want to clean.I've resorted to living in a messy house.

[nottaprettygal]

Okay... which ever type would organize this for me, would be my ideal partner - theoretically.

Organizing shoes is just a waste of time.

[Dr. Haight]

Organizing shoes is just a waste of time.Agreed. Okay, that works for me. So an INTJ would not care about the mess, therefore, no mess. I like that. Problem solved.

[Geoff]

Until you both pass the shoe event horizon, and civilisation collapses.

[Dr. Haight]

My shoes have been moved here. (http://forums.intpcentral.com/showthread.php?t=16558)

[SensEye]

Edit - I find it interesting NJs are winning out over NPs...I'm not. Let's face it, there are pros and cons to each strength but the cons that come with the P personality are not those you want in a life partner.

For example (and I realize I am stereotyping/exaggerating, but I do so to make a point).

Many of the P's here come across as chronic under acheivers. They lack stick-to-it-ivness and can't finish what they start. They hold crappy jobs because they can't stick to one long enough to get anywhere. They keep dropping out of college/switching majors because they get bored.

I'd much rather hitch my wagon to an individual where I don't have to worry about this kind of thing. I'm not all anal like an SJ but it would be nice to think your significant other could at least hold a steady job (and maybe a good one at that), or if you set a long term goal as a couple, there is a reasonable expectation they can hold up their end. I consider this attribute more inherent in the J nature so I would definitely prefer one. The N is supposed to keep them from getting too overbearing on the control side (which would be the biggest downside to the J nature IMO).

[Rajah]

Yeah, but there is some appeal to two chronic underachievers traveling the world and reveling in their vagabondy ways.

[C.J.Woolf]

With Mrs. Woolf and me it's misery loves company. I have no desire to support a slacker and neither does she, so we both have jobs. Shrug.

[Rhu]

Yeah, but there is some appeal to two chronic underachievers traveling the world and reveling in their vagabondy ways.
Must... find... someone like this. And also independently wealthy.

[C.J.Woolf]

Must... find... someone like this. And also independently wealthy.
I say to Mrs. Woolf all the time, "Why aren't you independently wealthy?" She says back to me, "Why aren't you?" Shrug.

[Rhu]

I say to Mrs. Woolf all the time, "Why aren't you independently wealthy?" She says back to me, "Why aren't you?" Shrug.
If you really loved her, you'd know that she was signalling that you were supposed to rob a bank.

[attila_the_hunny]

If you really loved her, you'd know that she was signalling that you were supposed to rob a bank.

I can't imagine two INTPs pulling off a bank robbery.

[Ellis]

INTJs might care about the mess before you do, though. Mess isn't particularly efficient, after all. :P

[booyalab]

I was pretty ignorant back then. :huh:

By the way, it just dawned on me that I had a dream about you last night, and in the dream, you wouldn't tell me your real name. So very, very cruel... and controlling. So very cruel and controlling.

interesting. where's madrigal when you need her? It's Gertrude, btw

[attila_the_hunny]

INTJs might care about the mess before you do, though. Mess isn't particularly efficient, after all. :P

It depends. My INTJ ex-girlfriend never did much of anything, so she would always complain about how messy I was when she would come over. She had the time to. My INTJ boyfriend is another story--always have something to do. If it doesn't smell, have mold or bugs flying around it, he doesn't notice.

[Birdsnest]

I'm going to vote for ENTP, if they aren't extreme extroverts. I think it would be handy to have someone that can handle dealings with people so I didn't have to at all, IF they didn't care that I didn't join them in same or expect me to be extroverted too. Unfortunately, E's think you need to like people, so it probably wouldn't work. Maybe an INTP with somewhat balanced F, S, E, would be ideal.

[Rhu]

I can't imagine two INTPs pulling off a bank robbery.
I could plan one! There are many factors to attempt to wrap your head around, which sounds like a very fun mental exercise. My eloquent, sexy and forever doomed to be imaginary INTP partner would probably take a look at the plan, offer critiques, and probably make fun of the goofy drawings I scribbled in the corner.

Once she'd be done picking apart my suggested plan, I'd pick apart her suggestions. Then we'd make another draft.

This would continue for several months, during which time we would gather all sorts of data, because research is sexy. This process will continue until at last the final draft was made, after months of critique, occasional heated arguments, and wrestling, we'd go and hit up the bank.

It's more than likely that we'd end up improvising something loosely based off the plan due to a flaw that was missed in the first draft and ignored in all subsequent drafts, but... we'll have all the bases covered, otherwise! It'll be the perfect plan!

Then: world travel. Maybe we'd go to some random country and one of us would run for mayor of a small town, just for kicks. And when we would be elected? We'd have a laugh at completely mismanaging the town, and a second in turning it into paradise before leaving--off to the next adventure.

This girl needs to stop being imaginary and suddenly appear, though. I'm getting impatient, and may have to do this on my own!

[Rajah]

I could plan one! There are many factors to attempt to wrap your head around, which sounds like a very fun mental exercise. My eloquent, sexy and forever doomed to be imaginary INTP partner would probably take a look at the plan, offer critiques, and probably make fun of the goofy drawings I scribbled in the corner.

Once she'd be done picking apart my suggested plan, I'd pick apart her suggestions. Then we'd make another draft.

This would continue for several months, during which time we would gather all sorts of data, because research is sexy. This process will continue until at last the final draft was made, after months of critique, occasional heated arguments, and wrestling, we'd go and hit up the bank.

It's more than likely that we'd end up improvising something loosely based off the plan due to a flaw that was missed in the first draft and ignored in all subsequent drafts, but... we'll have all the bases covered, otherwise! It'll be the perfect plan!

Then: world travel. Maybe we'd go to some random country and one of us would run for mayor of a small town, just for kicks. And when we would be elected? We'd have a laugh at completely mismanaging the town, and a second in turning it into paradise before leaving--off to the next adventure.

This girl needs to stop being imaginary and suddenly appear, though. I'm getting impatient, and may have to do this on my own!I had a similar plan once, but it involved a lot more cream pies.

[Rhu]

I had a similar plan once, but it involved a lot more cream pies.
I'm pretty certain that the Three Stooges would have been totally inept at robbing a bank. I could be wrong, though. I never did follow their epic quests too closely. "This oughtta sweeten your disposition, Mr. Rentacop! Nyuk, nyuk!" may sound good on paper... Hm. Maybe that's the projected flaw in my plan!

You aren't going to fool me! I will pull this off!















Unless you meant that another way... In which case, you wouldn't have had to put off your plans, if only you had made more use of contraceptives.

[Rajah]

Unless you meant that another way... In which case, you wouldn't have had to put off your plans, if only you had made more use of contraceptives.Nice small print.


Edit - And cream pies are sexy. Like research.

[Park]

I wohn't vote because I really don't know.
For me, the choise stands between INTP, INTJ and ENTP... I would probably end up killing an ENTJ.

[C.J.Woolf]

I can't imagine two INTPs pulling off a bank robbery.
Burglary would be more my style; robbery is too extraverted.

[airjaw]

I think INTP, ISFJ, ENFJ, INFJ, and possibly ENTJ can all work. Each pairing has their own strengths weaknesses and quirks. It comes down to personal preference as well as what stage you are at in life. For example, I might go through a "travel the world" stage for a few years in which case I'd prefer to take along someone willing to go through that with me. I might not care about paying the bills or being on time or being organized, so a P is possible. I might not care too much about intellectual stimulation and I might just care about living in the moment, having fun, etc etc. I think in this case another INTP or ESFP would be the best fit, with INFJ possible as well.

On the other hand I might be at a stage in my life where I want to settle down and am working a steady job. I'd probably want a J who can handle the bills.

Personally, I think right now I'd prefer a J as well as an E. I'm tired of acting social and am burned out from it so I'd rather someone have the energy to approach me first. I"m also not ready to take that 5 year tour of the world so P's are out of the question. I need a J to temper my Pness.

I don't have experience or theoretical knowledge of a few of them so maybe you guys can fill in the blanks.

ISFJ: I enjoy the guardianship and tenderness of the ; I hate the communication difficulties and lack of confidence.

INTP: Good communication; lack of initiative on either party. little to none compensation for each other's weaknesses.

INFJ: Know a few that I get along well with. The lack of E disturbs me personally. Some of them have a tendency to pry too deep at times.

ENFJ?

ENTJ?

[MacGuffin]

Well, the ENTP has gotten some votes finally. Poor Moridin is still sitting there alone with ENFP (no shum love?). And no one wants a Sensor.

[cafe]

With Mrs. Woolf and me it's misery loves company. I have no desire to support a slacker and neither does she, so we both have jobs. Shrug.
I'm glad my INTP doesn't think like you guys. I would be off the gravy train and mama loves the gravy train.

[Spirit]

I think INTP, ISFJ, ENFJ, INFJ, and possibly ENTJ can all work. Each pairing has their own strengths weaknesses and quirks. It comes down to personal preference as well as what stage you are at in life. For example, I might go through a "travel the world" stage for a few years in which case I'd prefer to take along someone willing to go through that with me. I might not care about paying the bills or being on time or being organized, so a P is possible. I might not care too much about intellectual stimulation and I might just care about living in the moment, having fun, etc etc. I think in this case another INTP or ESFP would be the best fit, with INFJ possible as well.

On the other hand I might be at a stage in my life where I want to settle down and am working a steady job. I'd probably want a J who can handle the bills.

Personally, I think right now I'd prefer a J as well as an E. I'm tired of acting social and am burned out from it so I'd rather someone have the energy to approach me first. I"m also not ready to take that 5 year tour of the world so P's are out of the question. I need a J to temper my Pness.

I don't have experience or theoretical knowledge of a few of them so maybe you guys can fill in the blanks.

ISFJ: I enjoy the guardianship and tenderness of the ; I hate the communication difficulties and lack of confidence.

INTP: Good communication; lack of initiative on either party. little to none compensation for each other's weaknesses.

INFJ: Know a few that I get along well with. The lack of E disturbs me personally. Some of them have a tendency to pry too deep at times.

ENFJ?

ENTJ?

What about INFP?

[Rajah]

Poor Moridin is still sitting there alone with ENFP (no shum love?).
I love ENFP's. Well, I love an ENFP.

[MacGuffin]

I love ENFP's. Well, I love an ENFP.
You voted ENFP?


I'm glad my INTP doesn't think like you guys. I would be off the gravy train and mama loves the gravy train.

Maybe he's not... I won't go there.

He is a traitor at minimum though.

[Rajah]

You voted ENFP?

I believe the poll asked for an ideal. I happened to find an ideal ENFP, but I'm not willing to say ENFP's in general are the ideal.

Sheesh.

[MacGuffin]

I believe the poll asked for an ideal. I happened to find an ideal ENFP, but I'm not willing to say ENFP's in general are the ideal.

Sheesh.
Well? How did you vote?

[Rajah]

Well? How did you vote?INTP who cleans!

*points at above comments*

[MacGuffin]

INTP who cleans!
Non-existant.

[bergenski]

Whatever type has an awesome ass.

[Dr. Haight]

Whatever type has an awesome ass.A fifteen year-old Vietnamese boy.

[bergenski]

A fifteen year-old Vietnamese boy.
I don't need to know your experience, kthnx.

[cafe]

Maybe he's not... I won't go there.

He is a traitor at minimum though.
He might well be a traitor, but I promise he went into it knowingly. When he married me, I wanted six kids and planned on home schooling them all. That would have put me out of the workforce for something like 30 years.

As it is, I'll probably start working on a two-year degree part time in the next year or two. Overall, he's easy going but if I'd suggested putting any of his babies in daycare for 40+ hours a week, those would have been fightin' words and I would have been sorry I went there. When I do go to work, he will want things arranged so that one of us can get them off to school and one of us can be here when they get home, I'd imagine until the youngest has graduated high school.

The part he didn't know about was that I'm kind of a slob . . .

[MacGuffin]

He might well be a traitor, but I promise he went into it knowingly. When he married me, I wanted six kids and planned on home schooling them all. That would have put me out of the workforce for something like 30 years.

SIX???

How do you weigh kids vs. financial comfort? I have come down on the latter side.

[euterpenc]

ENFP... cause I like to be whimsical and not tied down, and ENFPs seem like they might feel similarly. Along with the imperative that another intuitive would probably be best. Plus I somehow feel that there would be less passion in a T - T relationship. Feeling types tend to excite me, even in non-romantic relationships. Inspire my own inner F if you will. Extraversion vs. Introversion I'm not sure about. Ive only ever had extraverts for girlfriends, and the introverts I went after... well those situations could have been better.

[MacGuffin]

ENFP... cause I like to be whimsical and not tied down, and ENFPs seem like they might feel similarly.ExFx

Enjoy the crying jags, head games, and attention whoring!

[cafe]

SIX???

How do you weigh kids vs. financial comfort? I have come down on the latter side.
I didn't think of it at the time. We were naive kids back then. After I had the first one, I decided I couldn't handle more than four, so we now consider our family complete. I guess for us, kids and their well-being easily outweigh financial comfort. But our standards of financial comfort are pretty low. If we didn't have student loans, we'd consider ourselves comfortable now. My working will ensure our security in case he would lose this job and be unable to find one that makes as much and it will help us get rid of the debt and sock back for retirement.

[Pescaphile]

I don't have enough practical experience to vote meaningfully. I definitely prefer intuitives and I think that even a moderate extrovert would be too annoying for me. In the last few years I've dated INFP, INTJ and an INFJ. Based only on this limited experience, I think the NFs are preferable.

The INFJ was a walking contradiction. The outward appearance and life she'd lived seemed diametrically opposed to the woman I got to know. Fascinating really.

The INFP was fun and generally easy going. Decisions weren't easy for us to make together and so I think a bit more of the J might be a good thing.

The INTJ is by far the coldest of the bunch. I'm amazed at how easily she picks up skills and puts them to use. I'm the one being pursued here and that makes me a bit more recalcitrant than even normal. I have definitely enjoyed debating with her because she stays cool and rational about things. This allows me to push the limits using my Ne to throw out conjecture and adjust my position according to the response. I get some interesting responses fishing like this and it seems to befuddle the INTJ -I think especially because I seem to know things about her that she may not realize when in fact I'm fishing on a hunch. Nevertheless, she seems to have me in a plan and I find that a bit unsettling. Heck, I don't have me in a plan.

I've also been corresponding with another INFJ and have just recently started to become acquainted with a third. Both of these women are quite stimulating intellectually. I've been corresponding with the former for over 3-1/2 years and am going to go meet her. It wouls've been earlier but I've been doing my best (at times) to fend off the INTJ.

I'd realy like to spend some time with an INTP woman. I haven't knowingly ever met an INTP and can't think of anyone I know who I think fits the temperament. I think it'd be stimulating to converse with another one and could make for quite a stimulating romance though the practical matters might be challenging.

[venerationOFrabbits]

The INFP was fun and generally easy going. Decisions weren't easy for us to make together and so I think a bit more of the J might be a good thing.

Right, without J what is there between an INTP & INFP? Values vs. Analysis doesn't complement each other very well. It's like two people running towards each other, arms outstretched an all, and then missing each other, (completely) and so they just keep on running. :wave:

[cafe]

Right, without J what is there between an INTP & INFP? Values vs. Analysis doesn't complement each other very well. It's like two people running towards each other, arms outstretched an all, and then missing each other, (completely) and so they just keep on running. :wave:
*chuckles at the mental picture*

[venerationOFrabbits]

*chuckles at the mental picture*

I suspect I'm better off working on my ESTJ muscles, rather than working on becoming an INFJ in a disfunctional relationship.

[cafe]

I suspect I'm better off working on my ESTJ muscles, rather than working on becoming an INFJ in a disfunctional relationship.
*wonders if she inadvertently peed in somebody's oatmeal . . . *

[venerationOFrabbits]

*wonders if she inadvertently peed in somebody's oatmeal . . . *

No, not at all.

[euterpenc]

ExFx

Enjoy the crying jags, head games, and attention whoring!

Oh yeah... the attention whoring.... shit I forgot about that. Along with the tendency towards deep inner insecurity... now I'm getting second thoughts...

Man, now that I think about it, the Feeling types I know are really rather insecure. I've managed to overcome most of mine, thanks to my reason and experience. But I almost feel a sense of pity or arrogance over those not yet developed feeling types.

[Spirit]

Oh yeah... the attention whoring.... shit I forgot about that. Along with the tendency towards deep inner insecurity... now I'm getting second thoughts...


The ENFP I knew had both of that. Plus a bit too materialistic and conformistic attitude for my taste, when it comes to her "extrovert life". On the other hand, deeply inspiring, creative and real fun due to her gung-ho attitude. In the end, if you have someone who is 100% pro you (i.e., won't stab you in the back) and you can communicate without greater misunderstanding, probably a better choice than another low-energy I.

[geniusndisguise]

*sigh* Yes, you should definitely try to find a more developed, mature person to date. Especially if you're less developed yourself.

[airjaw]

What about INFP?

What are INFP's like?

[l_gold_a]

well.... i said a sensor... don't blame me... i wonder, why dating a sensor would be so bad, or unusual? did you consider them? think about an ESFP for a while...

[MacGuffin]

well.... i said a sensor... don't blame me... i wonder, why dating a sensor would be so bad, or unusual? did you consider them? think about an ESFP for a while...
Okay... done.

Hell no.

[l_gold_a]

Okay... done.

Hell no.

ok... thanks for considering of thinking about that...
i don't agree with you, but...that's life...

[cafe]

well.... i said a sensor... don't blame me... i wonder, why dating a sensor would be so bad, or unusual? did you consider them? think about an ESFP for a while...
Are you talking just dating or long term? I think an ESFP could be a lot of fun short term, but long term might be dicey.

[euterpenc]

well.... i said a sensor... don't blame me... i wonder, why dating a sensor would be so bad, or unusual? did you consider them? think about an ESFP for a while...

I think it's harder to relate and think on the same level a lot. There would necessarily have to be a gap somewhere of things that you just dont talk about because of this difference in type. Unless perhaps this is a transcendent relationship in which both parties are procificient with all of their functions so as to be able to use or at least understand the opposing function, in this case S vs. N.

[Avengardh]

intp.

[starla]

My ideal partner would be a male version of myself. So INTP.

[MacGuffin]

intp.


My ideal partner would be a male version of myself. So INTP.
Jerry: No, no this woman is different, she's incredible. she's just like me. She talks like me, she acts like me. She even ordered cereal at a restaurant. We even have the same initials. Wait a minute, I just realised what's going on.
Kramer: What?
Jerry: Now I know what I've been looking for all these years......myself!
(Kramer is speechless)
I've been waiting for me to come along and now I've swept myself off my feet.
Kramer: You stop it man.. you're FREAKING ME OUT!!!

...

Kramer: Look I'm sorry about before....I mean I'm sure I'll learn to like her, Jerry.
Jerry: Yeah, yeah.
Kramer: C'mon , c'mon what's the matter?
Jerry: I think I may have made a big mistake.
Kramer: Oh! Come on.
Jerry: All of a sudden it hit me, I realized what the problem is; I can't be with someone like me... I hate myself!! If anything I need to get the exact opposite of me....It's too much. It's too much. I can't take it ...I can't take it!!!
Kramer: (mocking) Too bad you got engaged.
Jerry: Yeah! Too bad.

[C.J.Woolf]

Time for another poll:

Ideal Romantic Partner Poll for INTPs Who Like Themselves

(They do exist.)

[Ellis]

The options, of course, would consist of:

o INTP
o No. (LIAR!)

[C.J.Woolf]

The options, of course, would consist of:

o INTP
o No. (LIAR!)
Hee! Great minds think alike.

/me waits for the crypto-INFP MacGuffin to weigh in.

[MacGuffin]

Hee! Great minds think alike.

/me waits for the cryto-INFP MacGuffin to weigh in.
You two forgot:

o Delusional

[C.J.Woolf]

You two forgot:

o Delusional
All this about finding a J to compensate for your enormous P-ness. You weren't looking for a mate, you were looking for an accountant and concierge.

[MacGuffin]

All this about finding a J to compensate for your enormous P-ness. You weren't looking for a mate, you were looking for an accountant and concierge.
I've got a back order for 3 Ivy clones. I figure two of them can do that!

[indie]

The idiotic idealist in me wants to insist that for an NT female, the ideal is another NT, so that's what I voted.

The NTP -- NFJ pairing (currently #1 in the polls) trend is seeming to work best when the dudes are the ones getting the NFJ. We NTP females are entirely outnumbered; I think this is totally unfair and totally biased. I think NT dudes who aren't afraid of their "F" tendencies are v. sexy.

[bclark619g]

Since research is sexy....


Teachers and Architects have every chance of being well suited. The educator or growth-catalyst inherent in the expressive and scheduling Teacher (ENFJ) wants to bring out the latent talents in his or her loved ones, and what better target than the reserved and probing Architect (INTP)? For beneath the Architect's cool, collected, detached and doubting exterior lies an engineer of buildings, machines, tools, operations, languages, mathematics, or whatever can be engineered. If, that is, this diamond-in-the-rough can be inspired to fulfill his or her potential.
(Keirsey, p.239, Please Understand Me II)


Architects and Teachers are apt to share a rare compatibility. The reserved and probing Architects (INTPs), all-to-easily lost in their abstract designs and desire for coherence, can despair of ever finding a mate who will listen to them and appreciate their visions. Fortunately, the expressive and schedule-minded Teachers (ENFJs), brimming with ideas in their own right, are catalysts of the personal growth process in others, able to bring out the best in others with inspiring personal enthusiasm. All the Idealists [NFs] seem to have this facilitative capability in some degree, but Teachers seem to have it in abundance--and Architects find this combination of intellectual spark and personal sparkle quite irresistible.
(Keirsey, p.251, Please Understand Me II)

These quotes come from Chapter 7, Mating, where he discusses how the different temperaments approach relationships. Keirsey says that all types can get along, if each person can get over the idea of trying to change the other too much. He lists the pairings, based on over 40 years of research, which he feels each type would be best suited. ENFP and INTP are best suited for each other in his opinion. Keirsey is married to an NF, but he doesn't say which type. He believes having the N in common and the abstract way of communicating are major factors in making the relationship work.

For the record, I married an ESTJ, 23 years ago. I think the main attraction was that she seemed to have her life all together. She was responsible, smart, and seemed very secure to my 21 year old self.

For all you unmarried people, I recommend reading Keirsey's book before settling on any MBTI type in a relationship. The book really explains the differences between temperaments with a clarity that has depth and is very logical. The material is presented in chapters that have the same headings, so it is easy to flip between types as you compare differences.

[Grandiloquent!]

I go absolutely boners for ENTJs
They can Te me any day

[songbird36]

For the record, I married an ESTJ, 23 years ago. I think the main attraction was that she seemed to have her life all together. She was responsible, smart, and seemed very secure to my 21 year old self.


I sympathise with your plight..

[MacGuffin]

I can't believe so many INTPs enjoy being told what to do by the Commandant ENTJ.

[C.J.Woolf]

I can't believe so many INTPs enjoy being told what to do by the Commandant ENTJ.
I agree. Do they think they can disobey without consequences?

[MacGuffin]

I agree. Do they think they can disobey without consequences?
If you are going to go with a J, make sure it is an introvert.

[Dr. Haight]

If you are going to go with a J, make sure it is an introvert.Damn, I wish I would have know that a few years ago. :huh:

[MacGuffin]

Damn, I wish I would have know that a few years ago. :huh:
Everyone has ideas about how others should think/act, Js probably more than Ps.

But the introverted Js know what is like to be impinged upon by Es so they are going to keep their mouth shut.

...until they feel comfortable with you! :devil:

[littlelostnf]

Everyone has ideas about how others should think/act, Js probably more than Ps.

But the introverted Js know what is like to be impinged upon by Es so they are going to keep their mouth shut.

...until they feel comfortable with you! :devil:

And THAT is the truth. Having many IXXJ's in my life I know that to be true.
and you'll hear it again and again and again. By the way I'm an ENFJ :-p

[Grandiloquent!]

I can't believe so many INTPs enjoy being told what to do by the Commandant ENTJ.

Wrong.
ENTJs don't boss us around. ENTJs boss around other people for us.
It's a little thing called love.

[MacGuffin]

Wrong.
ENTJs don't boss us around. ENTJs boss around other people for us.
It's a little thing called love.
And that love would most assuredly be improved if you only just did what the ENTJ says you should do...

[AcidGoethe]

ENTJ's are first and foremost NT's. They're not interested in micromanaging their partner - they're interested in knowledge, learning, competency and growing. I think "commandant" is a wrong label for most ENTJ's considering this. I would rather call the ENTJ "entrepreneur".

ENTJ's are the best partners for INTP's because ENTJ's are aggressive with life but need a place to calm down and zone out from time to time (=home). INTP's will enjoy the countless hours of intellectual exchange. INTP's and ENTJ's have complementary positions on many subjects. They also share pretty much the same sense of humor. ENTJ's like to do many different things and will likely bring up many ideas for activities centered around NTish interests. ENTJ's loud and idiosyncratic behavior is also a never ending source of comedy for the INTP. It takes time initially, though, as INTP's seem to be suspicious of ENTJ's until they realize the bark is worse than the bite. Finally, ENTJ's have complex personalities under the in-your-face appearance that will ensure countless things for the INTP to ponder about and explore.

[MacGuffin]

Nice propoganda.

NEXT!

[attila_the_hunny]

I think an extrovert would kill me.

[Grandiloquent!]

And that love would most assuredly be improved if you only just did what the ENTJ says you should do...

Well... doesn't that go for everyone? I mean, wouldn't your opinion of someone rise if they did everything you said?

[Choss]

INFJ i'd think theoretically<_<

[nottaprettygal]

Well... doesn't that go for everyone? I mean, wouldn't your opinion of someone rise if they did everything you said?

Are you being serious? If someone did everything that I told them to do, it would lower my opinion of them because it would prove that they have no backbone. Although the foot massages would be glorious!

As far as the poll is concerned, I'm insulted that INTJs only have one more vote than S types. Eww sensors.

[Oculus Sinister]

I think the ideal match for an INTP would be either ENFJ or ENTJ.

The key to it all is perhaps the enneagram type. A thinking type 5,6,7 would be better suited for an INTP IMHO. Someone who doesn't think INTP is too deep and likes to explore ideas as well.

[Grandiloquent!]

Are you being serious? If someone did everything that I told them to do, it would lower my opinion of them because it would prove that they have no backbone. Although the foot massages would be glorious!

As far as the poll is concerned, I'm insulted that INTJs only have one more vote than S types. Eww sensors.

What are you people? Si?
To say that have no backbone is an absolute statement. They can have a backbone with everyone else besides you. What assumptions you people have! Are you sure you're all INTPs? Seriously.
And to state in the first place that all ENTJs just try to boss anyone and everyone around is a disgusting stereotype. Just because I like ENTJs doesn't mean I like being bossed around. If an ENTJ were to boss me around, then fuck them, cause I don't have to be around them. The point of INTPs in an ENTJ's perspective is that we are the ones that show them alternate ways to do things. We are basically the only ones that can convince them they're wrong. They're basically the only ones that can understand what we say and get our ideas into motion. ENTJs that do not have a superiority complex are a billion times better for us than any INFJ.
The ones that do have a superority complex are only around a million times better.
In fact, ENTJs can offer us things no other types can even come near to touching. They are just flatout badass. Period.

[MacGuffin]

And to state in the first place that all ENTJs just try to boss anyone and everyone around is a disgusting stereotype.
That doesn't make it untrue.


We are basically the only ones that can convince them they're wrong.
No we are not.


They're basically the only ones that can understand what we say and get our ideas into motion.
Wrong again.


ENTJs that do not have a superiority complex are a billion times better for us than any INFJ.
ENTJ without a superiority complex? Where?

Turn off the F. And the S while you are at it. Your values and personal experiences do not make up a theory.

[Randomnity]

They can have a backbone with everyone else besides you. ....Just because I like ENTJs doesn't mean I like being bossed around. If an ENTJ were to boss me around, then fuck them, cause I don't have to be around them.
You seem to contradict yourself?

I voted ENTJ. INTJ would be my second choice. T = required, J = preferred, E and N seem like good things. I don't argue for the sake of arguing but I have a backbone also, so I don't end up getting controlled/bossed around. And, they are fun to argue with sometimes because they think they're so right. [/stereotyping]

[MacGuffin]

Just remember we are talking about romantic partners, not debate teammates.

[Randomnity]

The two are mutually exclusive?

[MacGuffin]

The two are mutually exclusive?
I hope not.

I just know I can get good mindsex online if I want.

Romance? That is something else entirely.

[attila_the_hunny]

I hope not.

I just know I can get good mindsex online if I want.

Romance? That is something else entirely.

Last dance
Last dance for love
Yes, its my last chance
For romance tonight

[Grandiloquent!]

That doesn't make it untrue.


No we are not.


Wrong again.


ENTJ without a superiority complex? Where?

Turn off the F. And the S while you are at it. Your values and personal experiences do not make up a theory.

Oh shit. What a convincing argument. Who can argue with that?
Excuse me, but what makes you think that your "theory" is any less made up of personal values and experiences?

[Grandiloquent!]

You seem to contradict yourself?

I voted ENTJ. INTJ would be my second choice. T = required, J = preferred, E and N seem like good things. I don't argue for the sake of arguing but I have a backbone also, so I don't end up getting controlled/bossed around. And, they are fun to argue with sometimes because they think they're so right. [/stereotyping]


Yes, that would be contradicting myself... if I wasn't addressing two separate things. Which I was.

[MacGuffin]

Oh shit. What a convincing argument. Who can argue with that?
Excuse me, but what makes you think that your "theory" is any less made up of personal values and experiences?
Uh... cause I've never been with an INFJ?

Lay it out, why would an extraverted thinking judger make a good romantic partner? You are only one letter from ESTJ!

[Ivy]

I hope not.

I just know I can get good mindsex online if I want.

Romance? That is something else entirely.

Mindsex often leads to romance.

[MacGuffin]

Mindsex often leads to romance.
Assuming the T can actually do that.

[Grandiloquent!]

Uh... cause I've never been with an INFJ?

Lay it out, why would an extraverted thinking judger make a good romantic partner? You are only one letter from ESTJ!

First of all there is no thing as an "extraverted thinking judger" since there is no possible way there could be an "extraverted thinking preceiver". Second of all don't say "one letter away" from a type. Not only is it wrong, but it's gross. If you go by letter and not function, you are basically spitting on everything Jung ever worked for. If you're analyzing me based on a few statements made online, then you are spitting on everything psychoanalysis is made for. So don't even try, okay? Myer and Briggs are douchebags that added the J/P dimension to Jung's theory which classifies types into "organized" and "unorganized" so that they could make it easier to test. The thing is, everyone is organized, it's all a matter of what you organize. Introverted Thinkers such as ourselves organize our own logical judgments, while passively allowing others to do their own thing. Extraverted Thinkers organize the logic of others, testing others, and willingly leading others when the situation calls for it.
Here's how it breaks down:
We think extensively about our own value judgements. Whether the initial statement is made by an Introverted Thinker or an Extraverted Thinker does not matter. The Extraverted Thinker will automatically question the Introverted Thinker's judgement regardless of whether or not they actually agree. They do this in order to test us to see if we know what we are talking about and to possibly learn something new. The Introverted Thinker defends their point well, turning down arguments of TeNi with Ne (which sounds something like "well, what if that, what about this?"). Whoever wins the argument doesn't matter either. The Extraverted Thinker is then impressed by the Introverted Thinker and the Introverted Thinker is stimulated when actually finding someone who can make logical points without being a dumbass. Then they fall in love, get married and make lots of babies. Sounds good to me.
And I don't really care if you disagree about the romantic type. I just don't like the fact that you slander ENTJs over one false, stupid generalization.

[MacGuffin]

First of all there is no thing as an "extraverted thinking judger" since there is no possible way there could be an "extraverted thinking preceiver". Second of all don't say "one letter away" from a type. Not only is it wrong, but it's gross. If you go by letter and not function, you are basically spitting on everything Jung ever worked for. If you're analyzing me based on a few statements made online, then you are spitting on everything psychoanalysis is made for. So don't even try, okay? Myer and Briggs are douchebags that added the J/P dimension to Jung's theory which classifies types into "organized" and "unorganized" so that they could make it easier to test. The thing is, everyone is organized, it's all a matter of what you organize. Introverted Thinkers such as ourselves organize our own logical judgments, while passively allowing others to do their own thing. Extraverted Thinkers organize the logic of others, testing others, and willingly leading others when the situation calls for it.
Here's how it breaks down:
We think extensively about our own value judgements. Whether the initial statement is made by an Introverted Thinker or an Extraverted Thinker does not matter. The Extraverted Thinker will automatically question the Introverted Thinker's judgement regardless of whether or not they actually agree. They do this in order to test us to see if we know what we are talking about and to possibly learn something new. The Introverted Thinker defends their point well, turning down arguments of TeNi with Ne (which sounds something like "well, what if that, what about this?"). Whoever wins the argument doesn't matter either. The Extraverted Thinker is then impressed by the Introverted Thinker and the Introverted Thinker is stimulated when actually finding someone who can make logical points without being a dumbass. Then they fall in love, get married and make lots of babies. Sounds good to me.
And I don't really care if you disagree about the romantic type. I just don't like the fact that you slander ENTJs over one false, stupid generalization.
Jung isn't God and his words aren't written in stone.

I'm not seeing a lot of romance there. Somehow exchanging ideas leads to love? The entire forum should be fucking each other at this point.

The bolded portion should have every INTP run screaming into the night. They will try to control you at some point. You won't agree on everything, and then the ENTJ will try to impose their will.

[Grandiloquent!]

Jung isn't God and his words aren't written in stone.

I'm not seeing a lot of romance there. Somehow exchanging ideas leads to love? The entire forum should be fucking each other at this point.

The bolded portion should have every INTP run screaming into the night. They will try to control you at some point. You won't agree on everything, and then the ENTJ will try to impose their will.

Jung isn't God but his theories are made on simple observation. The observation of human nature. Human nature as in that thing God created. Jung is a human being but that doesn't make his theories automatically invalid. Myer and Briggs, however, are still douchebags because their method does not add up with reality. J and P are usless and if anything lead to more inaccurate testing. That's why they say to test more than once and if you can't get one type after taking the test many times, talk to a professional to find your type. They knew it was flawed. They basically stole Jung's ideas and fucked them up. If you don't agree with Jung and if he's so unrealible in his theories then why the hell are you here? Because he's the one that started all of this. Seriously, it's, like, 95% him.

How the hell do you think romance happens? Maybe what you're idea of romance is the touchy-feely, lovey-dovey cliche, but it certainly doesn't have to be. To me, what I described is romance. T romance. And that's all I need.
It's a matter of compatibility of personality. Do you think we should be paired up with an F because they're all "emotional" and "emotional" is what defines a relationship? How is that fair to an F type to have a dominant T partner? We work with ENTJs because we both have inferior F functions which means if we are emtionally retarded, we are emotionally retarded together. We won't get hurt as easily by each others dominant T tendencies.

OH MY GOD. ENTJs are human beings, okay? They might get frustrated and they might disagree but they are not slave drivers. ENTJs may be arrogant, they may be assertive, but above else they are all bark and no bite. Hell, they are sensitive, they're just too arrogant to show it. They still listen to reason and they are well aware of their boundaries. Yes, this is a generalization and I would say there are a few exceptions that may do what you describe, but I assure you this generalization is much closer to reality than any claims you make.

[MacGuffin]

How the hell do you think romance happens? Maybe what you're idea of romance is the touchy-feely, lovey-dovey cliche, but it certainly doesn't have to be. To me, what I described is romance. T romance. And that's all I need.
That's what you think... now. Don't assume that is all you will ever need. You are young (http://forums.intpcentral.com/showthread.php?t=16727).


It's a matter of compatibility of personality. Do you think we should be paired up with an F because they're all "emotional" and "emotional" is what defines a relationship? How is that fair to an F type to have a dominant T partner? We work with ENTJs because we both have inferior F functions which means if we are emtionally retarded, we are emotionally retarded together. We won't get hurt as easily by each others dominant T tendencies.
Expanding on the link above, just because one is emotionally retarded doesn't make that an end state, or something to strive for. There is a lot to learn from Fs, and Ts can teach them a lot too.


I assure you this generalization is much closer to reality than any claims you make.
Based on...?

P.S. you need to post more around here.

[ptGatsby]

Jung isn't God but his theories are made on simple observation. The observation of human nature. Human nature as in that thing God created. Jung is a human being but that doesn't make his theories automatically invalid. Myer and Briggs, however, are still douchebags because their method does not add up with reality.


If you want reality, go to the Big Five or some other factor-analysis system.

Just for the record, systems adapt. They can even get better! Jung's system was so full of holes that even he didn't consider it a theory of much note. He did create the J/P divide, and the MBTI crew adapted on it. Seems like the model closely reflected factor research, although it excluded one. Course, it has its own set of problems... but anyway.



Jung isn't God but his theories are made on simple observation. The observation of human nature. Human nature as in that thing God created.


I'll be sure to ask God why he made me an INTP in this life. I'm sure he'll answer "Someone had to be there to suffer the fools".



We work with ENTJs because we both have inferior F functions which means if we are emtionally retarded, we are emotionally retarded together. We won't get hurt as easily by each others dominant T tendencies.


o_O I once heard balance was important on life. Clearly the best match for us would be be INTPs then, right? Cause that way we can get someone who won't be any different, thus cause the least conflict!



ENTJs may be arrogant, they may be assertive, but above else they are all bark and no bite.


Hmm, quite the opposite from my INTJ. Guess the E/I turns into no bark, but big bite.

[s0978]

If an ENTJ were to boss me around, then fuck them, cause I don't have to be around them. The point of INTPs in an ENTJ's perspective is that we are the ones that show them alternate ways to do things. We are basically the only ones that can convince them they're wrong. They're basically the only ones that can understand what we say and get our ideas into motion.
yup, kinda, pretty much.

macguff loses to grandy.



*hopes grandy is teen female*
*crosses fingers*

[cafe]

Is it possible there's somewhat of a gender divide on INTP ideal spouse preference, males leaning towards E/INFJs and females towards ENTJs? It would kinda make sense if there was . . .

[MacGuffin]

macguff loses to grandy.
:sadbanana:

Again??? Do I ever get to win?

[s0978]

:sadbanana:

Again??? Do I ever get to win?
you did OK in that immaturity thread.

*pat, pat*

[faith]

The point of INTPs in an ENTJ's perspective is that we are the ones that show them alternate ways to do things. We are basically the only ones that can convince them they're wrong.

Not the only ones. I've convinced my ENTJ friend he's wrong more than once. He admits that he's learned a lot from me.

[Grandiloquent!]

That's what you think... now. Don't assume that is all you will ever need. You are young (http://forums.intpcentral.com/showthread.php?t=16727).


Expanding on the link above, just because one is emotionally retarded doesn't make that an end state, or something to strive for. There is a lot to learn from Fs, and Ts can teach them a lot too.


Based on...?

P.S. you need to post more around here.

At the risk of sounding conceited, I would have to say I am not all that immature in my general personality development. I have never done the assimulation part, personally, and I don't plan to. I think that by using art since I was little, and by being surrounded by very colorful friends, my Ne has been developed much more than it would have otherwise. I am weak in certain areas, yes, but that comes naturally with any type. I am immature when it comes to F, but to spend time trying to develop this would take time away from perfecting my dominant functions.
I'm sorry if it came off as sounding like I didn't want to experience emotions. What I had in mind was ocassionally letting the emotional child out by yelling "YOU ASSHOLE I HATE YOUR STUPID FACE" and him yelling "YOU BITCH GO PLAY IN TRAFFIC" then we both run into different rooms and slam the doors behind us, then burst out crying like little children. Then afterwards we can both walk out equally embarrassed. An F type could be emotionally manipulating, which is partly why I prefer another T. A T may be manipulating, but at least it will be in an area I am well versed in and can at least detect. An ENTJ would want to start to explore the F part of their personality later in life, around the same time as me. So that would just be another experience to go through together, the way I sees it.
I am somewhat emotionally repressive, but if I want to know more about F I go to my friends. Specificly and rarely I ask my INFJ best friend, who doesn't think less of me for being emotionally immature. I seriously asked her what flirting was defined as in actions not too long ago. That's why I consider INFJs to be great friends, but not great partners. We have been best friends for 13 years so I don't mean any offense when I say that I would never date with her : P

I base this view of ENTJ off of an ENTJ topic in another board. They are pretty much adorable and complain about their stereotyped image. http://similarminds.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=57&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=45
Yah, it's a lot of pages. I didn't actually read all of it, I just skimmed most of it. I like reading Kyle's posts.
It's basically the reason why every ENTJ male is automatically my husband and every ENTJ girl automatically my hero (ENTJ girls don't get enough love, btw).

Oh, and I would post more, but I probably shouldn't. I should actually be doing college applications right now (which are already a week or so late), but no. Instead I am here on the internet talking about personality types. If that doesn't prove an INTP I don't know what will.


If you want reality, go to the Big Five or some other factor-analysis system.

Just for the record, systems adapt. They can even get better! Jung's system was so full of holes that even he didn't consider it a theory of much note. He did create the J/P divide, and the MBTI crew adapted on it. Seems like the model closely reflected factor research, although it excluded one. Course, it has its own set of problems... but anyway.



I'll be sure to ask God why he made me an INTP in this life. I'm sure he'll answer "Someone had to be there to suffer the fools".



o_O I once heard balance was important on life. Clearly the best match for us would be be INTPs then, right? Cause that way we can get someone who won't be any different, thus cause the least conflict!



Hmm, quite the opposite from my INTJ. Guess the E/I turns into no bark, but big bite.

I don't see the point in just going to another personality type method. They all basically measure the same things. They all just cover the same qualities, since they're all based on observations. I think these types could be the most accurate if only the tests were set up differently. Actually, my best friend and I are developing our own testing method... heh. We're going to try it out for a project later in the year :X
The reason why I got into Jung's ideas over others is because it's more intricate by describing the preference order with the rational and irrational axis. It works with a spectrum of personality traits instead of a one dimensioned one. Actually, I don't know that much about the other type methods, but I have tested with them and wasn't as impressed.

Bleh. I would never date another INTP. I kind of think it's conceited to want to date someone who thinks in the same process as me, even if our ideas are different. That's why I like ENTJs. Cause they're alike and yet different at the same time.

Yah. I know all about INTJs. My mom is an INTJ.
I would not want to date INTJs either XO
No Freudian thing going on here.



*hopes grandy is teen female*
*crosses fingers*

oh my. oh dear.


Not the only ones. I've convinced my ENTJ friend he's wrong more than once. He admits that he's learned a lot from me.

Yah. I probably shouldn't have said only :O
My bad.

[s0978]

What I had in mind was ocassionally letting the emotional child out by yelling "YOU ASSHOLE I HATE YOUR STUPID FACE" and him yelling "YOU BITCH GO PLAY IN TRAFFIC" then we both run into different rooms and slam the doors behind us, then burst out crying like little children. Then afterwards we can both walk out equally embarrassed.
lol. I don't think I've ever said anything quite like this, but it's true- absurd to think emotionality cannot be intense between NTs, in fact just making for more authentic conflict and resolution. And I'm also inclined to suspect the INTP-ENTJ dynamic is particularly productive in this respect, gender neutrally.


oh my. oh dear.:) I enjoyed your posts here more than you could know. Thank you very, very much.

[Hustler]

*hopes grandy is teen female*
*crosses fingers*

teen females +1 | macguff +0 ?

[s0978]

teen females +1 | macguff +0 ?
I'm thinkin she's up at least +2!

[MasterMerk]

The idiotic idealist in me wants to insist that for an NT female, the ideal is another NT, so that's what I voted.

The NTP -- NFJ pairing (currently #1 in the polls) trend is seeming to work best when the dudes are the ones getting the NFJ. We NTP females are entirely outnumbered; I think this is totally unfair and totally biased. I think NT dudes who aren't afraid of their "F" tendencies are v. sexy.

I agree.

I prefer an NT female who is first and foremost T, but is capable of pulling out the F and isn't turned off by it in their partner. Well rounded INTPs are definitely the best you can get - intelligent, multifaceted, fun, adventurous, non-demanding and respectful as to not bombard you with neediness.

NFs tend to express feeling in ways I cannot relate to. I'd probably say this was my T filtering out rational values from the irrational ones.

I vote INTP, with ENTP coming in second.

[MacGuffin]

:) I enjoyed your posts here more than you could know. Thank you very, very much.


teen females +1 | macguff +0 ?


I'm thinkin she's up at least +2!

<_<



I should Purgatorize this stupid thread!

[sbw]

I am somewhat emotionally repressive, but if I want to know more about F I go to my friends. Specificly and rarely I ask my INFJ best friend, who doesn't think less of me for being emotionally immature.

I have one of those too. you are very wise.

Scott

[brakedown]

i am most attracted to infjs, so naturally thats what i voted. although, i think an infp would also be a good match. -i am only slightly introverted so i would not mind another introvert.

[MacGuffin]

While the ENxJs are giving a good fight, once again the INFJ is coming out on top.

INTJ, ENFP, and Sensors are bringing up the rear.

Remember to actually vote!

[C.J.Woolf]

While the ENxJs are giving a good fight, once again the INFJ is coming out on top.

INTJ, ENFP, and Sensors are bringing up the rear.

Remember to actually vote!
INTP is running a solid fourth. If this were the New Hampshire primary I'd spin it as a "better than expected" result.

[Biff_Loman]

My ISFJ wife is a great partner for an INTP.

[MacGuffin]

My ISFJ wife is a great partner for an INTP.
Yay. You better not have voted that way.

This goes for all of you:

Theory, not personal experience. You and your partner are together because of who each of you are, MBTI types don't matter so much. We are trying to formulate a general theory for the INTP.

[Park]

I havn't been following this thread so closely but really to those who voted ENFJ - YOU ARE MAD!!!


Just had to say that again *MAD*.

[C.J.Woolf]

I havn't been following this thread so closely but really to those who voted ENFJ - YOU ARE MAD!!!


Just had to say that again *MAD*.
1. Why?

2. How did you vote?






/me's still pimpin' for INTP! :banana:

[Rhu]

I havn't been following this thread so closely but really to those who voted ENFJ - YOU ARE MAD!!!


Just had to say that again *MAD*.

I'm MAD, but only because my parents weren't paying attention when they named me. And I didn't vote! Your theory is wrong!

[Park]

1. Why?

I know a few ENFJs (http://www.teamtechnology.co.uk/mb-types/enfj.htm), the very thought of trying to satisfy any of their excessive needs or demands exhausts me. I raise the white flag, throw the towl in the ring...I think I need a nap.


2. How did you vote?

Nothing, I did mention INTP, INTJ and ENTP as possible options.


/me's still pimpin' for INTP! :banana:

Yeah, I hear you.

[Park]

I'm MAD, but only because my parents weren't paying attention when they named me. And I didn't vote! Your theory is wrong!

How can it be wrong if you didn't vote? I subjectively concluded that voting for ENFJs as ideal romantic partners for INTPs was an action derived from madness. If your madness isn't derived from that, how can my *theory* (as you call it) be wrong?

[C.J.Woolf]

I'm MAD, but only because my parents weren't paying attention when they named me. And I didn't vote! Your theory is wrong!
Not necessarily. Voting for ENFJ may or may not be one way to be MAD, but it's not the only way -- as you demonstrated by being born MAD.

[Rhu]

Not necessarily. Voting for ENFJ may or may not be one way to be MAD, but it's not the only way -- as you demonstrated by being born MAD.

I'm... I'm not unique anymore?

:sorry:

[Toonia]

The INFJ-INTP pairing does fascinate me because it is my experience, but seems to happen with some frequency. I'm not an expert on MBTI, but there are aspects of this pairing that work quite well, and others that don't. My Martoon was always drawn to introverted-feeling women even before we met. He doesn't process emotion much and has low tolerance for such, but the kindness and gentleness that can be associated with feeling types is a big draw for him. As a feeler, i pay attention to emotional signals and so don't have to pry and make him talk about feelings much for communication to take place. His laid back, free perspective is a relief for me because most people send out all sorts of signals and get really offended when people don't read them. It wears me down because i prefer it when people aren't offended. Sometimes i tire him if i feel too much pain for too long. It's not neediness, because i can handle a great deal of pain on my own, but its hard for him to have to know about.

INTP's do need people to share intellectual pursuits with, and believe it or not people who are feelers are not all as stoopid as stumps. hee hee. Actually, finding an NF who is intelligent and interested in analysis helps. Really pure, hard, abstract logic, and technical pursuits don't hold my focus as much, but many aspects of science, math, philosophy, arts, have elements of beautiful design and human interest that provide enough intellectuall/emotional draw for me as an NF.

Whoever said that the INTP doesn't really need a romantic partner has some truth in their statement. I think half of an INFJ would be perfect for an INTP. As far as ENFJ's go, that would work as long as the ratios were 1ENFJ:3+INTPs, or 1INFJ:1+INTPs

Seriously, their space needs to be respected and provided for. There are aspects of traditional marriage arrangements that i could see cramping their style (for some anyway). Living together or just having a lifetime relationship might make more sense - having their own place and such perhaps? I think Martoon ends up keeping me around because he can get me to respond to him with expressive faces which he laughs at all the time.

[aether]

I don't think I've ever met INFJ's in real life. And if I have, I probably thought that they were too good to be true.

[Toonia]

I don't think I've ever met INFJ's in real life. And if I have, I probably thought that they were too good to be true.Next time you meet one, just tell them that and chances are they will bend over backwards to try to live up to your expectation. I mean that in a good way (and a fun way). :happpy:

[cafe]

Toonia's here! :hug:

[firch]

Dear Santa,
An idealistic low maintenance somewhat moody slightly slovenly type person who isn't bothered that she is the one to initiate conversation nearly all the time that likes her own quiet time too and maybe needs just one hour of interaction a day. A person in touch with her feelings so she can remind me of my weaknesses but has a brain and isn't totally irrational. Oh yeah and she mustn't run up a huge phone bill.
Yours Sincerely,
Firch.

P.S. I chose INFJ at the top of the page, but couldn't find the add to cart button.

[Ivy]

Dear Santa,
An idealistic low maintenance somewhat moody slightly slovenly type person who isn't bothered that she is the one to initiate conversation nearly all the time that likes her own quiet time too and maybe needs just one hour of interaction a day. A person in touch with her feelings so she can remind me of my weaknesses but has a brain and isn't totally irrational. Oh yeah and she mustn't run up a huge phone bill.
Yours Sincerely,
Firch.

P.S. I chose INFJ at the top of the page but couldn't find the add to cart button.

I'm so sorry, Firch. I'm already married.

[MacGuffin]

I'm so sorry, Firch. I'm already married.
And I'm back ordered for three clones.

[firch]

I'm so sorry, Firch. I'm already married.
Plenty more about. :P

[Toonia]

Toonia's here! :hug:I couldn't stay away from you and some other happy people. :hug:

[C.J.Woolf]

P.S. I chose INFJ at the top of the page, but couldn't find the add to cart button.

I'm so sorry, Firch. I'm already married.

And I'm back ordered for three clones.
Mac hid the "add to cart" button after he ordered his three copies. Selfish bastard, eh?

[zenbrat]

I like NF's but I tend to bruise their sensibilities. It never works out.

I like NT's but I consistently run into NTJ's. It never works out.

I like SP's but it's a lot like trying to nail jello to a tree. It never works out.

I can handle SJ's. They seem to be able to handle me better than anyone. The only people with whom I've ever been able to stay in relationships with were ISFJ and ESFJ. They didn't get as offended as the NFP's, as freaked out as the STP's or as irritated as the NTJ's.

[darlets]

Plenty more about. :P

There's less INFJs than INTPs

[Tayshaun]

I like NF's but I tend to bruise their sensibilities. It never works out.

I like NT's but I consistently run into NTJ's. It never works out.

I like SP's but it's a lot like trying to nail jello to a tree. It never works out.

I can handle SJ's. They seem to be able to handle me better than anyone. The only people with whom I've ever been able to stay in relationships with were ISFJ and ESFJ. They didn't get as offended as the NFP's, as freaked out as the STP's or as irritated as the NTJ's.

That's wise. INTPs should not rule out SJs despite their common value rigidness.

However, apart from the ISFJ, I have a hard time seeing any of them as "ideal" romantic partners. Their main asset, especially ESXJs, is that they can keep a INTP grounded and take care of dealing with the external demands for them. Whether it can stunt the INTP's personal growth is another problem.

Despite this, I am amazed that you could have a relationship with an ESFJ. They are so often stuck to their rigid irrational value system and usually do get offended, though mostly by people of the same gender. Their universe seems somewhat irreconcilable with the INTP's.

[zenbrat]

That's wise. INTPs should not rule out SJs despite their common value rigidness.

However, apart from the ISFJ, I have a hard time seeing any of them as "ideal" romantic partners. Their main asset, especially ESXJs, is that they can keep a INTP grounded and take care of dealing with the external demands for them. Whether it can stunt the INTP's personal growth is another problem.

Despite this, I am amazed that you could have a relationship with an ESFJ. They are so often stuck to their rigid irrational value system and usually do get offended, though mostly by people of the same gender. Their universe seems somewhat irreconcilable with the INTP's.

We do clash on their tendency to try and 'parent' my NTP into a suitable SJ form. But, eventually, they realize where my true compentency lies and they sort of 'work around' me. They come to appreciate my NT way of looking at things and my P randomness to bring in new experiences (in small doses and at the right times, of course). It becomes a comfortable symbiosis after a while - the roles just click into place.

[charred_heart]

I havn't been following this thread so closely but really to those who voted ENFJ - YOU ARE MAD!!!


Just had to say that again *MAD*.ENFJ's Rock The Casba!!! :p

I voted INFJ, typical.

[ZHASH]

Come to think of it, yes, an INTP with an ENFJ.

[ZHASH]

I worry about the "I" and "I". I think that both would end up in their cave.

It's interesting but all my life, I've been more of an extraverted INTJ but as I've aged, I've become far more introverted. I guess you just get sick of people when you've overdosed on welcoming people in your life during the earlier years. I think that when I was married to an INTP, he liked me when I was more extraverted. I seemed to bring him out of his cage. I think INTP's just love debate whether it is postive or negative. An INTP might want relief from an extravert and retaliate, you know, "shut the "f*cK up" but sheepishly, they know that extraverts make them come alive.

[geniusndisguise]

An INTP might want relief from an extravert and retaliate, you know, "shut the "f*cK up" but sheepishly, they know that extraverts make them come alive.

Yes they do. You see that Mac?!

[Toonia]

There's less INFJs than INTPsHow many less? Like i mentioned in my earlier post, i think 1/2 of one INFJ seems a perfect match for one INTP. :smooch: What if we put two INTPs with each INFJ? Problem solved? :whistle:

[Dirty-American-Devil]

I worry about the "I" and "I". I think that both would end up in their cave.

It's interesting but all my life, I've been more of an extraverted INTJ but as I've aged, I've become far more introverted. I guess you just get sick of people when you've overdosed on welcoming people in your life during the earlier years. I think that when I was married to an INTP, he liked me when I was more extraverted. I seemed to bring him out of his cage. I think INTP's just love debate whether it is postive or negative. An INTP might want relief from an extravert and retaliate, you know, "shut the "f*cK up" but sheepishly, they know that extraverts make them come alive.

I'm not too sure about that statement, as least with me. When I am with an extravert, I usually tend to be more introverted. The whole "look at me" aura they give is a turn off. When I'm with another introvert though, my curiosity gets the best of me, and I'll start prying them open. Its like a game, its a mystery to find out what they are thinking, feeling, etc. Because of this, I find if I'm with another true introvert, I become an extravert, and they feed off my 'energy'. The best thing about this, is when I tire of talking, or just wish to sit and say nothing, they are more then happy to do the same.

I am all about the INFP's. I love them. The I and N is pratically a must, as well as the P. I just want someone with an open mind, a bit eccentric, and someone who doesn't feel they need to talk all the time to feel committed or happy. The F, I love, because I recieve attention. INFP will eventually become my caretaker. Watches over me kinda. I honestly enjoy that, but only with a lover. In return, I believe I give them a very logical and pratical ways to deal with things, because often there feelings get in the way.

The only problem I have had with INFP though, is having a deep discussion. This is where the F and T collide. It gets frustrating because we use two different ways to place our values and beliefs on. Eventually, you agree to disagree, but thats what makes it so neat, the difference in the way things or decided.

[ZHASH]

I am all about the INFP's. I love them. The I and N is pratically a must, as well as the P. I just want someone with an open mind, a bit eccentric, and someone who doesn't feel they need to talk all the time to feel committed or happy.



But who is going to pay the bills and who will make sure you're at the airport with enough time to check in? I knew of a "P" couple and they were always in collection agencies and they never made their plane when traveling.

[Dirty-American-Devil]

O, thats the bliss of online banking and direct deposit. I would be lost without it.
Money goes in all by itself, money goes out all by itself.
I even have 200 a month put into another checking account/credit card deal, for food and gas.

I don't have to worry about that stuff.

[cafe]

But who is going to pay the bills and who will make sure you're at the airport with enough time to check in? I knew of a "P" couple and they were always in collection agencies and they never made their plane when traveling.
Oh, heck. That's me and I'm a J. :lol: It's taking us a long time to get our feet under us, but what a ride! I wouldn't have missed all this for any amount of money or punctuality, and as for the collection agencies, we're getting them slowly paid down. In the meantime, we have caller ID. We talk to them when we feel like it. It sucks, but the world doesn't leave it's orbit over it. Life's too short to fuss much about that stuff.

[ZHASH]

I guess I need to loosen up. I'm learning a lot on this forum.

[littlelostnf]

I suppose if I were an "I" I might constantly tout myself as superior to an E. However I need it to be explained to me why is it necessary to constantly put E's down. We're loud we're pushy, we have no depth (so on an so forth).

First of all you don't see E's puting I's down. I think the balance is important and I don't see the need to put down I's although there is plenty that could be said in a negative way about them. I'd also like to point out that I know more INFJs and INFPs, INTPs and INTJs then I know ENFJ's and ENTJ's (I have to admit I know LOTS of ENFP's) I've heard everyones reasons about why you don't see ENFJ's (we're to busy "extroverting") to spend the time being "deep" online. Sorry but I personaly feel that ENFJ's are prob the most misunderstood and rare of the NF's. How many do you know? If you know more than 3 please...I'd like to know. I'd like to see if we share a history of being totally misunderstood (especially by I's)

I live alone, I spend as much time alone with myself and my thoughts as possible simply because so many feel the need to "take" from me. If you think it's easy to be blessed with the type of outward personality that people are simply drawn to think again. ENFJ's are one of the most private of all types and rarely do people truly listen to them. It's a lonely place to be. No one wants to take the time it takes for an ENFJ to open up. They take the first layer as the only layer.

Only those I's have anything beneath the surface...the E's please it's all out for you to see. WRONG. I feel sorry for all the people here who look at an outgoing bubbly E (especially an NF) and figure..well that's all folks. You might want to try to get over your I selves and give an E a try.

[Mr Pink]

A vote for ENTJ is a vote for

http://static.blogo.it/tvblog/veronica_mars_5.jpg

[airjaw]

No one is theoretically or actually better in real life than another person, we all have our own unique strengths and flaws.

I think INTP's are just so traditionally misunderstood by society that they might take out their bitterness here on other types. You're right, its bs ...

[littlelostnf]

I suppose if I were an "I" I might constantly tout myself as superior to an E. However I need it to be explained to me why is it necessary to constantly put E's down. We're loud we're pushy, we have no depth (so on an so forth).

First of all you don't see E's puting I's down. I think the balance is important and I don't see the need to put down I's although there is plenty that could be said in a negative way about them. I'd also like to point out that I know more INFJs and INFPs, INTPs and INTJs then I know ENFJ's and ENTJ's (I have to admit I know LOTS of ENFP's) I've heard everyones reasons about why you don't see ENFJ's (we're to busy "extroverting") to spend the time being "deep" online. Sorry but I personaly feel that ENFJ's are prob the most misunderstood and rare of the NF's. How many do you know? If you know more than 3 please...I'd like to know. I'd like to see if we share a history of being totally misunderstood (especially by I's)

I live alone, I spend as much time alone with myself and my thoughts as possible simply because so many feel the need to "take" from me. If you think it's easy to be blessed with the type of outward personality that people are simply drawn to think again. ENFJ's are one of the most private of all types and rarely do people truly listen to them. It's a lonely place to be. No one wants to take the time it takes for an ENFJ to open up. They take the first layer as the only layer.

Only those I's have anything beneath the surface...the E's please it's all out for you to see. WRONG. I feel sorry for all the people here who look at an outgoing bubbly E (especially an NF) and figure..well that's all folks. You might want to try to get over your I selves and give an E a try.


Hahaha forgot to say...any INTP would be LUCKY to have an ENFJ be his/her partner in life. We're kind, laid back, need our own fair share of alone time and since we really can do without a romantic partner in life (because our lives are pretty darn full without a romantic interest to deal with also) if we choose to be with you...you'll know just how important you are to us that we are giving you our time. :-p

[mmortal03]

The INFJ was a walking contradiction. The outward appearance and life she'd lived seemed diametrically opposed to the woman I got to know. Fascinating really.

That sounds a lot like an INFJ friend of mine. He seems to go to parties, drink, and do all the standard crazy liberal carefree college student things, but then when we are hanging out, h tends to be quiet, conservative, a good listener and seems to be genuinely interested in my intellectual topics of discussion.

I think it seems as if he fulfills his FJ side in two completely different ways. One, partying like everybody else does, but two, hanging out and having quiet interesting conversation with an INTP. Maybe he is simply just a quiet and calm Extravert instead of an Introvert, or maybe just a borderline Introvert/Extravert. What do you think?

[airjaw]

Hahaha forgot to say...any INTP would be LUCKY to have an ENFJ be his/her partner in life. We're kind, laid back, need our own fair share of alone time and since we really can do without a romantic partner in life (because our lives are pretty darn full without a romantic interest to deal with also) if we choose to be with you...you'll know just how important you are to us that we are giving you our time. :-p

I've never seen anyone quote themselves before. Is this an ENFJ display of narcissism?

Just kidding. I agree with you. Although I don't know any ENFJ's IRL.

[Melody]

hey, i quote myself. :) but then again i'm incredibly arrogant, so it's not exactly a counterexample :\


Hahaha forgot to say...any INTP would be LUCKY to have an ENFJ be his/her partner in life. We're kind, laid back, need our own fair share of alone time and since we really can do without a romantic partner in life (because our lives are pretty darn full without a romantic interest to deal with also) if we choose to be with you...you'll know just how important you are to us that we are giving you our time. :-pit's obvious an ENFJ is the best match for an INTP, but out of curiousity, what do you think is the best match for an ENFJ?

[littlelostnf]

I've never seen anyone quote themselves before. Is this an ENFJ display of narcissism?

Just kidding. I agree with you. Although I don't know any ENFJ's IRL.


Oh yeah I forgot to say..we also think we're amazingly witty and generally right all the time so we actually do go around quoting ourselves ;)

hmmm not knowing any other ENFJ's you sound like lots of people I know. I only know one IRL besides myself and she is quite similar to me despite 10+ years difference in age...being another "race" and growing up in a different type of family situation. We both comment on how private we really are (we work together as special education teachers) and how most people generally only think to look at our top layer and so we're generally not willing to show them what's deeper down and more real. She's married, I'm not and she is married to an INTJ. She claims she's P enough for the both of them in many ways. Organized about people and relationships in her head...but can be just as scattered and flacky as your favorite P (especially NFPs) Order does not always have to do with things. My order also comes in people and relationships not my physical life (altho I like nothing more than a wonderfully clean house and knowing that all bills are paid and things are taken care of. I love it but it doesn't happen with the regularity that I'd like. :)

[littlelostnf]

hey, i quote myself. :) but then again i'm incredibly arrogant, so it's not exactly a counterexample :\

it's obvious an ENFJ is the best match for an INTP, but out of curiousity, what do you think is the best match for an ENFJ?


I suppose I tend to agree. An INTP seems rather "ideal" but what does that really mean anyway. I think it would depend on the individual altho I tend to be drawn to the INTP personality type. I like their calm that doesn't seem to require being removed from people (I can sometimes only achieve my calm when I'm not around others) I like their thoughts and where they take them...I'm out there too. I enjoy their enthusiam for their interests and I absolutely LOVE having conversations with them because in the end no matter if we agree right then or not I can usually look back at some point and realize that we were saying basically the same thing in diff ways and being an E and F I don't mind going to them and saying...sorry dude I realize we were just talking about either side of the same coin...you're right (and even if he doesn't tell me I'm right back)...I know I am ;) ha!

[airjaw]

lol. I can't wait to meet an ENFJ!

[littlelostnf]

lol. I can't wait to meet an ENFJ!

I wish you the best in your quest...we seem to be more rare than most...and believe me I want to meet more with a similar lean as me. I just met another INFJ (I heart her) last month...girlfriend of an ISFP friend of mine. She's lovely...I have an INFJ cousin and I have another INFJ friend in my life my NF score is as follows

INFJ - 4
ENFJ - 1
INFP - 3
ENFP - 7 (and three of these could appear ESFP if you didn't know them well but they are def enfps)

so...if you find another...again, let me know...I'd love to meet him or her.

[MySavior]

Hahaha forgot to say...any INTP would be LUCKY to have an ENFJ be his/her partner in life. We're kind, laid back, need our own fair share of alone time and since we really can do without a romantic partner in life (because our lives are pretty darn full without a romantic interest to deal with also) if we choose to be with you...you'll know just how important you are to us that we are giving you our time. :-p
false. What I think about ENFJ's, when they try to say something about me: Ni my ASS. What I think about ENFJ's when they channel their conviction about me into an action: KISS my ASS.

Sorry.

Nice people. A bit invasive, though. Nowhere near as bad as an ENFP that's convinced of their correctness. My relations with ENFJs are best when they don't have ANY power over me, leaving me free to ignore them, without their being able to conjure up a consequence. Can't imagine dating one. I don't need that stress.

[Rhu]

false. What I think about ENFJ's, when they try to say something about me: Ni my ASS. What I think about ENFJ's when they channel their conviction about me into an action: KISS my ASS.

Is this generalization drawn from multiple ENFJs, or just one?

I mean, I had a bad experience with an INFJ once, but my problem was more with her as an indvidual than INFJs as a group. I think. I haven't met another since, as far as I know.

In any event, this poll and ensuing thread has left me convinced: a general formula for matching an INTP is giving too much credit to MBTI and not enough credit to the needs of people as individuals. So I refuse to vote.

[Lee]

No one is theoretically or actually better in real life than another person, we all have our own unique strengths and flaws. Some more than others.

[littlelostnf]

Is this generalization drawn from multiple ENFJs, or just one?

I mean, I had a bad experience with an INFJ once, but my problem was more with her as an indvidual than INFJs as a group. I think. I haven't met another since, as far as I know.

In any event, this poll and ensuing thread has left me convinced: a general formula for matching an INTP is giving too much credit to MBTI and not enough credit to the needs of people as individuals. So I refuse to vote.

good for you and I agree with that. I think that for the most part if you're at all interested in the mbti you sort of type people as a matter of course...but if you can then let that go a bit and deal with the person as an individual and not a set of letters and generalizations. Not that I don't believe we fall into our types to some degree but life experience shapes us into variations of our types.

[MacGuffin]

An INTP might want relief from an extravert and retaliate, you know, "shut the "f*cK up" but sheepishly, they know that extraverts make them come alive.

Yes they do. You see that Mac?!
If you go searching for another person to complete yourself, you will always be incomplete. Make yourself come alive.

Ever been in a room with someone you love and not have to say a word? Just being together. Good luck ever getting that from an extravert.


In any event, this poll and ensuing thread has left me convinced: a general formula for matching an INTP is giving too much credit to MBTI and not enough credit to the needs of people as individuals. So I refuse to vote.
Excellent response.

[MySavior]

Is this generalization drawn from multiple ENFJs, or just one?

I mean, I had a bad experience with an INFJ once, but my problem was more with her as an indvidual than INFJs as a group. I think. I haven't met another since, as far as I know.

In any event, this poll and ensuing thread has left me convinced: a general formula for matching an INTP is giving too much credit to MBTI and not enough credit to the needs of people as individuals. So I refuse to vote.
Most of my generalizations (and yes, that is what they are) have been drawn from many moons of experience. There is always knowledge to be had, even in generalizations.. as long as you are prepared to look at what is being said, and not the who, where, or when.

I'm obviously convinced that I'm right about my experiences with ENFJ. And this may or may not be obvious, but I AM open to the possibility of their being ENFJ's unlike those I've had experience with.. But then again, I'm not going to hold my breath.

An aside: Like.. good looking, ethical, innovative, engaging, people-friendly INTP's exist.. but they are a definite exception, not a rule. You may die, if your life depended on finding one. My problem: taking on the perception that an INTP is then ugly, unethical, narrow-minded, and cold, based on my view. Implications are all around, but you can only stretch them so far.. sometimes you should just say: I need more information.

Sorry.

[Toonia]

good for you and I agree with that. I think that for the most part if you're at all interested in the mbti you sort of type people as a matter of course...but if you can then let that go a bit and deal with the person as an individual and not a set of letters and generalizations. Not that I don't believe we fall into our types to some degree but life experience shapes us into variations of our types.I so agree. It can turn into fanatical horoscope reading if people lose objectivity and don't keep it at a distance. MBTI is not about ethics or morality of people or individual nuance. I would never date/not date, befriend/reject anyone based on type. Good grief.

I even have a special soft, little spot in my heart for INTJ's even though some are rumored to eat people. :huh:

[geniusndisguise]

If you go searching for another person to complete yourself, you will always be incomplete. Make yourself come alive.

Ever been in a room with someone you love and not have to say a word? Just being together. Good luck ever getting that from an extravert.


First, "complete"? Ick. No way. Enhance? Sure.

Also, who are these extroverts you're running into who seriously never shut up? I have been in a room with someone I love and not have to say a word, my ex, and he's an extrovert. Not only that but go to long without a word being uttered and I begin to worry what the problem is. It's worse, in my opinion, to be in a room with someone when neither can bring themselves to say a thing - which is what happens with me and another as introverted as me.

Anyway, I think the point is that there are variations among all types and traits. Matching them together is more than just picking one or more of an MBTI type.

[Ivy]

If you go searching for another person to complete yourself, you will always be incomplete. Make yourself come alive.

Ever been in a room with someone you love and not have to say a word? Just being together. Good luck ever getting that from an extravert.

Amen, brotha. I would no sooner date/mate with an extravert than I would shave my head and paint it Carolina blue.

(Although, that sounds kind of cool. Maybe I'll do that.)

That sounded harsh, and I ordinarily avoid sweeping generalizations, but I just don't know if I could maintain a relationship with an extravert. It would be exhausting for me to be engaged with anyone constantly, and extraverts seem to expect that. I hang out with my sister and we're constantly riffing off of each other, which is great fun, but I couldn't do it in my primary relationship. If I get quiet, she thinks something is wrong. That doesn't happen with intraverts.