Writing Poetry

[bmw318tiChic]

There is a poetry contest in my school. I consider myself a somewhat good writer, but I am not much of a poet. I have written a few poems and you may read them here- http://ttr.blindeyed.com/poetry Please feel free to criticize these or offer advice. In my opinion, they aren't spectacular compared to other things I've read.

Sometimes it is hard to find inspiration to write a poem. If you know of any words that could initiate inspiration, or that could have a deep meaning, or situations that a poem could be written about, feel free to share them. I really don't know what to write about for this contest.

Basically, I am looking for:
1. critique on my current poems / advice for future poems
2. words / situations to inspire poetry writing

Thanks :)

[songbird36]

Get hold of some Mark Doty books and read them from cover to cover.

That's my best advice to any budding poet..

[waxwing]

Hi.

A few thoughts...

In short, can you show rather than tell? The instances in which you show the reader something are much more powerful, in my opinion. While you do a fine job of explaining, I think that your poems would be strengthened by an attempt to evoke/suggest images and emotions rather than present them in narrative form . Make sense?

You got my attention with the lines, "Her toes dug into the loose, moist dirt." ("Her Escape") Why? Because I was forced to slow down, enunciate those words, and in effect, think about the meaning.

In "Struggling Dancer," I appreciate the line "You must weight one oh one." The word "oh" seems to communicate some pain and/or stifling, restrictive experience on the part of the speaker. Good job.

Throughout, I think you may be able to replace some of the more pedantic words with poetic language that fleshes out the meaning in cliched words such as "stupid" (The Last Few Days of School). I'd much rather hear what that stupid busywork was like in something only left to the imagination....

I think your poetry has real potential. If you concentrate on being more imagistic/figurative and less narrative/explanatory, I think your poems would be more powerful. Only a suggestion, though.

There's this really good poet I like a lot. His name is Billy Collins. He wrote a few poetry collections ("The Art of Drowning," "Questions about Angels") and I think that you may like them, given the sentiment expressed in some of your poetry. "On Turning Ten"...a beautiful poem by him. If you can't find it, let me know and I'll post it for you.

Other than that, I'd like to encourage you to keep writing. I can tell that your writing is about expressing some really deep ideas and emotions.

Revise ---> re-see (This has kind of been the theme of both my writing and my life).

Hope that helps at least a little bit.

Edit -- I was thinking about rhythm and timing in poetry. For me, it helps to read a poem aloud either to myself or someone else (preferably both, a few times). After reading it, sometimes a phrase or word sticks out and sounds awkward. I like to think of poetry as being sung or spoken rather than simply read.

[Edmond Zedo]

If you make it rigidly metered, I might be able to read it all the way through, and the judges might be so shocked they'll give you first prize.

[tragula]

They sound like lyrics to me. Which is a compliment because I like lyrics more than poetry... Call me crazy but I like it when stuff rhymes! You might want to check out "the Cure" lyrics or "velvet underground" lyrics, as the tone/style reminded me of them.
I liked "transparent blue eyes" and "let me be" best, as they had good emotional resonance.
I would skip the little explanations at the bottom if I were you and just let the poems speak for themselves!

[bmw318tiChic]

Thanks for your advice everyone :)

Yeah, I was thinking about the explanations at the bottom.. and a good poem shouldn't really need to be explained.

[songbird36]

No serious poets in New Zealand use rhyme anymore.