Mormon families and trampolines

[sandwich]

The Churched Childhood thread reminded me of a profound observation my cousin made a few years back. I'd like to see how accurate it is for the various ex-Mormons on the forum and what conclusions they might draw from it.

If you were brought up in a Mormon home, did your family own a trampoline?

If numbers are consistent with my own informal data (Only one subject has tested negative so far): why is this so? Can you draw any deeper meaning concerning the Golden Tablets or reformed Hieroglyphics?

[Oso Mocoso]

I'm not a Mormon, but I live very near Palmyra, NY (birthplace of the Mormon movement) and I can say that the area around Hill Cumorah (where the Golden Tablets were allegedly discovered) is not some hotbed of trampoline ownership.

--Oso

[Bradtv]

Raised Mormon, always been agnostic. No trampoline though my grandmother (small one) and only one of the five other related families in the church have one. My cousin broke his C2 vertebrae on his trampoline while his younger sister broke her leg on a friends (nonmember) trampoline.

I did serve a mission to Louisiana-Mississippi. I don't recall many members with trampolines down south. The local church unit only has one family with one.

[Flaming Monkey]

thus far the polling data is a bit skewed. :smooch:

[sandwich]

No trampolines yet? It must be a west coast trend.

[MacGuffin]

This is one of the stranger thread concepts I've seen in a while.

Carry on.

[djm]

This thread is bizarre in the extreme.

Th sum total of my knowledge of mormonism comes from scanning their bible in a US motel last year, and a rather anti-mormon novel (Riders of the Purple Sage by Zane Grey). I can't recall seeing anything about trampolines in either of them.

Here in England we have a political party that bounces on trampolines (the Natural Law Party). They are an adjunct to a religious cult that practices 'transcendental meditation'. Their HQ is in Skelmersdale, where they claim they have reduced crime by 20% through yogic flying (bouncing cross legged on a trampoline whilst in a trance). You couldn't make it up.


The UK Natural Law Party
The first Natural Law Party was launched in the UK, with Dr. Geoffrey Clements as Party Leader. The party fielded candidates in approximately 300 out of a total of some 600 constituencies. A significant number of constituencies were contested by nationals of countries outside the UK, including Canada, Australia, New Zealand, and India, as British electoral law allows any member of a Commonwealth country to stand for Parliament. Former Beatle George Harrison performed in a fund-raising concert during the campaign.
The UK manifesto, like all other NLP platforms in the subsequent decade, was founded on two assertions: (1) that the development of consciousness, in particular through the practice of the Transcendental Meditation and TM-Sidhi Program including Yogic Flying, can enhance individual capability to resolve societal problems, and (2) that the practice of these techniques by a critical mass of the population, or else their group practice, in particular the group practice of Yogic Flying, results in overall improvements in society, including reduced crime, accidents and hospital admissions and improvements in prosperity, security and quality of life. The party quoted peer-reviewed published scientific research for many of its assertions.
In the first UK campaign, as in most subsequent campaigns in other countries, Natural Law candidates gained an average of approximately 0.4% of votes.

Don't see what it has to do with Mormonism, but it can't make the thread any more wierd lets face it.

[epsilon72]

No trampoline. Us kids were too busy playing videogames to participate in any sort of physical activity.

[cjs55]

Mormon with a trampoline. WTF?

But everyone had one. There were a shitload of trampolines in our neighberhood. I guess alot were mormon, but many weren't as well.

[Oso Mocoso]

It's like I'm participating in a postmodern deconstructionist interpretation of the greater INTPc narrative, shoehorned into this small but infinitely absurd thread.

--Oso

[MadamI'madaM]

wow

I live in the 2nd most concentrated mormon city in America (not including flds compounds) and where I live this is dead on.

I'm not Mormon, but I couldn't avoid befriending a few and I think they almost all had trampolines at some point.

[sandwich]

Here in England we have a political party that bounces on trampolines (the Natural Law Party). They are an adjunct to a religious cult that practices 'transcendental meditation'. Their HQ is in Skelmersdale, where they claim they have reduced crime by 20% through yogic flying (bouncing cross legged on a trampoline whilst in a trance). You couldn't make it up.


This is good stuff. Have you ever seen it in practice? I'm just trying to visualize someone able to meditate while bouncing on their butt. Sounds very difficult.


Mormon with a trampoline. WTF?

But everyone had one. There were a shitload of trampolines in our neighberhood. I guess alot were mormon, but many weren't as well.

I never had one. I also never had one of those nifty Flinstone-style plastic cars and despised every child who did. Maybe this is why I sometimes have a resentment for mormons. It only occurs at times, and maybe it's because my inner child can sense that their inner child was a happy owner of a trampoline in their inner backyard.

But why would everyone in the neighborhood need a trampoline? You wave over the fence to each other?

[Wolf]

I'm not, but I lived in their capital for quite a few years...

Trampolines are everywhere there, especially owned by the most prominent and obvious ones. I have no clue why this is.

I'd say it's up there with the pliggy van, picture of the temple on the wall, and little bust of Jesus on a table in the living room for the top way to say you're a devout mormon.

[Chedner]

I'm Mormon, and I've never had a trampoline -- of course, it was only because my folks had 11 kids and my mum didn't work (so, we couldn't afford one); otherwise, we probably would have had one. Most of my nieces and nephews have or have had a trampoline.

Personally, I think it's because jumping up and down makes one more fertile (this is only a theory, mind you)... and fertility is pretty important in the Mormon culture.

[trapstar]

We had a mormon girl in our school who spoke with an american accent but sucked at english... interesting you think... so do I

[vulcan]

There should be an option for people who had Mormon friends who had trampolines. And I believe that every single one did in fact have one.

[owarinoTenshi]

I was Mormon and we never had a trampoline because my parents thought they were too dangerous, but about half of the other Mormon families I knew had one.

[sandwich]

I'm Mormon, and I've never had a trampoline -- of course, it was only because my folks had 11 kids and my mum didn't work (so, we couldn't afford one); otherwise, we probably would have had one. Most of my nieces and nephews have or have had a trampoline.

Personally, I think it's because jumping up and down makes one more fertile (this is only a theory, mind you)... and fertility is pretty important in the Mormon culture.

Interesting theory.


We had a mormon girl in our school who spoke with an american accent but sucked at english... interesting you think... so do I

There are a good many Americans with awful English. It's a sad thing.


I was Mormon and we never had a trampoline because my parents thought they were too dangerous, but about half of the other Mormon families I knew had one.

Half? How many months of the year were suitable trampoline weather?

[Helios]

If I convert (or atleast fake it briefly) will you send me one?

[Toonia]

This is a truly hilarious thread. :rofl: There may actually be a little logic behind it.

Mormon families =

1. Large numbers of children needing entertainment
2. Probably located in Utah which gets too cold and has a lot of bedrock which makes swimming pools less practical.
3. searching for fun to point the children heavenwards

= trampolines

[ryan_m_parr]

As long as the marketing doesn't change: ex. Tramp-o Lines

Then they will recieve complaints . . . and such

It would end a large sum of the market place

[Sokkorobo]

The trampoline thing more or less corresponds with my encounters with mormon's. Didn't a lot of people have above ground pools? How about jungle jim's? Does the data correlate?! Amazing.

[Lethal Sage]

Raised Mormon, always been agnostic. No trampoline though my grandmother (small one) and only one of the five other related families in the church have one. My cousin broke his C2 vertebrae on his trampoline while his younger sister broke her leg on a friends (nonmember) trampoline.

I did serve a mission to Louisiana-Mississippi. I don't recall many members with trampolines down south. The local church unit only has one family with one.

How could you possibly be an agnostic and serve a mission?

In answer to the question: I'm living with my crazy Mormon family and yes we own a trampoline. This is the third I believe.

[sandwich]

In recent developments, there is a facebook group titled "All My Mormon Friends Have Trampolines" (http://washington.facebook.com/group.php?gid=2383244032).

Here are some group observations:

-Recent Census: Utah has an average of 14.2 trampolines per square mile

-Once in heaven, Mormons now get square trampolines to maximize bounce! Course it doesn't matter because they probably get wings also

-There is about 1 trampoline death every year, the last non-mormon trampoline death was by a circus performer in 1995

-In the book of mormon, if one turns it upside down and flips the pages in reverse order, an image of a human bouncing up and down is clearly apparent

-Joseph Smith, creator, first mormon, what have you, was said to have shown remorse because he new "something is missing" in mormonism. If only Joe could have lived to see that fateful day when trampolines were invented in 1936

[Chunes]

I grew up mormon, and my family did not own a trampoline but a lot of my mormon friends did.

[bonsai]

My family isn't Mormon, but I spent a number of years in Utah when I was young, and there were a lot of trampolines. :)

[V Profane]

Why didn't South Park (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_About_Mormons) educate me about this particular Mormon quirk?

[Dunearhp]

What this tells me is that Mormons are especially susceptible to viral marketing of backyard playground equipment.

[sandman7474]

Raised mormon. Had a Trampoline, or "the tramp" as we would refer to it. Another informal observation over my life in mormonism is that they are suckers for multi level, get rich quick scams. And they never seem to learn from the last one.

:banghead:

[Lethal Sage]

Raised mormon. Had a Trampoline, or "the tramp" as we would refer to it. Another informal observation over my life in mormonism is that they are suckers for multi level, get rich quick scams. And they never seem to learn from the last one.

:banghead:

I can attest to that. It annoys me to no end.

[Works]

Raised mormon. Had a Trampoline, or "the tramp" as we would refer to it. Another informal observation over my life in mormonism is that they are suckers for multi level, get rich quick scams. And they never seem to learn from the last one.

:banghead:

I imagine it has something to do with playing to their sense of hierarchy which the LDS church and theology has in spades. Of course, so do the Catholics.

[sandwich]

Raised mormon. Had a Trampoline, or "the tramp" as we would refer to it. Another informal observation over my life in mormonism is that they are suckers for multi level, get rich quick scams. And they never seem to learn from the last one.

:banghead:

Did you vote? There must be more than two!

[joft]

holy shit, how are there so many mormons on the forum?

also, the man show should have had an episode dedicated to mormon girls jumping on trampolines

[Works]

holy shit, how are there so many mormons on the forum?

also, the man show should have had an episode dedicated to mormon girls jumping on trampolines

May I just add that after dating a Mormon girl in high school I realized just how wild some of them actually were.

She later went to BYU for college and was engaged in a year and a half.

[ho hum]

If you had a housefull of kids and they were running around driving you crazy, you'd get a trampoline too. Then you send them out there and make them jump their energy off so that they could come in the house and down a healthy casserole with the secret Mormon ingredient (mayonaise). Then the ones that were driving you crazy in the evening you'd send out with sleeping bags and let them spend the night on it. Geeezzz, don't you guys know anything about raising a celestial family?

[HappyNoodleBoy]

If you had a housefull of kids and they were running around driving you crazy, you'd get a trampoline too. Then you send them out there and make them jump their energy off so that they could come in the house and down a healthy casserole with the secret Mormon ingredient (mayonaise). Then the ones that were driving you crazy in the evening you'd send out with sleeping bags and let them spend the night on it. Geeezzz, don't you guys know anything about raising a celestial family?

Mexicans dont have trampolines, and they have buttloads of kids. It has to be something other than the kids that attract Mormons to trampolines.

[ho hum]

Mexicans dont have trampolines, and they have buttloads of kids. It has to be something other than the kids that attract Mormons to trampolines.

Well I don't know about you, but the Mexicans that I grew up with didn't have the cash that we did. They did have a cool game calle huachas that involved throwing washers at buried soup cans and man, could their moms cook. Fresh tortillas off of the stove. Mmmmmm.....

[Chunes]

holy shit, how are there so many mormons on the forum?

also, the man show should have had an episode dedicated to mormon girls jumping on trampolines

I said I was RAISED Mormon.

I dumped that shitty religion years ago.

[Lethal Sage]

I said I was RAISED Mormon.

I dumped that shitty religion years ago.

Seconded.

[AubreyInTheWired]

I was raised mormon and I remember talk of getting a trampoline, which always excited me as a child, but never did our family get a trampoline. It must have been my parents' sadistic form of psychological torture. "Oh yeah, we'll get a trampoline someday..." WHERE IS MY FUCKING TRAMPOLINE?!?! It scarred me for life.
My mormon cousins in Utah, however, did indeed have a trampoline. But they lived on a farm.

[Oso Mocoso]

Ha! Someone necromanced this thread. This was one of the best uses of a poll evar. Five stars.

[sandwich]

I agree.

[A Schnitzel]

After reading through this thread, I have to say that I will never doubt sandwich's awesomeness again. This is how five star threads are made.

As for the question. I am not Mormon, nor have I ever owned a trampoline. That being said I think trampolines are a way for parents to keep their children at home and out of the "dangers" of the outside world. While still allowing the children to get their "exercise" and "fun".

[joft]

http://www.thelunchjournals.com/custom/Pics/Other/New/Humerus.jpg

[msg_v2]

if everyone in the world had a trampoline instead of a gun, the world would be one big human popcorn machine.

[Limey]

Mormon's knocked on my door once. I was pretty fucking nonplussed with their stupid brainwashed faces from the get-go and I've invited Jehova's witnesses into my parents home as a teenager for debates on their alleged garden of babylon and the assertion that I was going to hell for not joining them.

Those Mormons had old style bicycles and INTJ looking shirts and ties, but no signs of excessive trampoline use.

[RedFox]

Funny because I grew up mormon and I remember all my mormon friends having trampolines, I wanted one too but our backyard was too hilly. If I had to guess the relationship between mormons and trampolines I would say it has to do with the closely-knit mormon communities. Mormons spend a lot of time outside church socializing with other familes in the church (There are many many different youth groups and organizations for adults) so people brings they're kids over and stuff, pretty soon all the kids want trampolines.

Near the end of high scool I pretty much lost all my faith and opted to enter the Marine Corps Infantry instead of going on a "Mission". One of the many reasons for this was to send a big "FU" to all the people (parents included) forcing me to observe the religon. I remember one instance where I got caught with marijuana and my parents forced me into a sort of "confession" with the branch bishop. I ended up getting more than I bargained for but my parents came around and gave me a lot of support while I was in. Now that I am out I actually usually still go to Church, but only with them and only if I'm in their area. My dad actually apologized and related him forcing my unwilling observance of LDS laws to the same religous extremists I almost died fighting. I never really like their dogmatic principles, and I still get harrassed by my parent's church leaders when I go, we never seem to see eye-to-eye. In my childhood we we're always told never to research or read anything critical of the Church, I could never stand by or defend and organization that tells me NOT to attempt to understand the other side, even if we were right that's just countering ignorance with ignorance.

[Oso Mocoso]

http://www.askgramps.org/why-do-so-many-mormons-have-trampolines/

Finally. A conclusive answer to this question which has persistently dogged the forum.

[Hueffenhardt]

I know this thread is old, but I am a former Mormon and we never had a trampoline when I was growing up, but my best friend, who was Mormon, did.

[A Schnitzel]

I know this thread is old, but I am a former Mormon and we never had a trampoline when I was growing up, but my best friend, who was Mormon, did.

So you think the rate is around 50%?

[Hueffenhardt]

So you think the rate is around 50%?

I have nothing more than anecdotal evidence, but I would guess that less than 20% of Mormon families have trampolines.

[Neville]

Raised Mormon, no trampoline. Everyone had pools though.

[PlasticFish]

I live in a suburban area with a lot of Mormon families. I've never seen a trampoline. Or a pool. For the most part there isn't room in the yards. I bet some places could squeeze trampolines in. I do have to make sure I don't trip over plastic vehicles on the way to my apartment, though!

[Awn]

This topic has come up in two different conversations I've had in the last month. Weird.

I asked a couple of my Mormon friends about it, and they said that about 90% of the Mormon families they knew had trampolines. They are both from pretty prevalent Mormon communities (Utah and Idaho).

I'm convinced.

[C.J.Woolf]

As for the question. I am not Mormon, nor have I ever owned a trampoline. That being said I think trampolines are a way for parents to keep their children at home and out of the "dangers" of the outside world. While still allowing the children to get their "exercise" and "fun".
And sexual sublimation.


I asked a couple of my Mormon friends about it, and they said that about 90% of the Mormon families they knew had trampolines. They are both from pretty prevalent Mormon communities (Utah and Idaho).

I'm convinced.
I'm thinking of another culturally homogeneous group, the Japanese. When something becomes a fad in Japan, it's a really big fad. Perhaps the Mountain West Mormons are the same when it comes to fads.

[Awn]

I'm thinking of another culturally homogeneous group, the Japanese. When something becomes a fad in Japan, it's a really big fad. Perhaps the Mountain West Mormons are the same when it comes to fads.

That's a good point.

Also, they may just indulge their kids. I remember wanting a trampoline really badly when I was young, but my parents cleverly realized that I can barely walk without hurting myself. It likely would have killed me.

[ciphersort]

If you were brought up in a Mormon home, did your family own a trampoline?


I was not brought Mormon, but the two Mormon families I know in Jacksonville, Florida do in fact own trampolines.

[ryan_m_parr]

My first babysitter had about 7-8 kids, and a trampoline. They were Mormon

[avolkiteshvara]

That being said I think trampolines are a way for parents to keep their children at home and out of the "dangers" of the outside world. While still allowing the children to get their "exercise" and "fun".

Sounds reasonable.

They have to keep the kids away from the evils of caffinated colas and darned curse words.

[sandwich]

Three option polls are only appropriate in cases of binary questions. Despite the reminder of my early failings, it warms my heart every time this thread is revived.

[decades]

I've never correlated it with being Mormon. However, I have lived most my life in the suburbs of Seattle, and have noticed that there are trampolines everywhere in the recently built, upper-middle class, conservative neighborhoods(Mormon havens.)

[Oso Mocoso]

Three option polls are only appropriate in cases of binary questions. Despite the reminder of my early failings, it warms my heart every time this thread is revived.

This thread really is a timeless classic.

[djm]

I have a trampoline, and am not knowingly Mormon.

[avolkiteshvara]

I have a trampoline, and am not knowingly Mormon.


There is a temple or two in the UK:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/61/LDS_Temples_World_Map_200711.png


Link (http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/61/LDS_Temples_World_Map_200711.png&imgrefurl=http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:LDS_Temples_World_Map_200711.png&usg=__R5X5RLHlVTmYf4jy3rufp1wQnls=&h=628&w=1427&sz=44&hl=en&start=2&um=1&tbnid=65UJ14RaUdM2yM:&tbnh=66&tbnw=150&prev=/images%3Fq%3DLDS%2Bmap%26hl%3Den%26um%3D1)

[djm]

Yes there is one in Chorley, it cost a small fortune. They are also one the largest landowners in the EU these days, which I find slightly sinister.

I do not understand how they manage to recruit anyone over here, perhaps they don't and it's a big empty white elephant.

[Limey]

Yes there is one in Chorley, it cost a small fortune. They are also one the largest landowners in the EU these days, which I find slightly sinister.

I do not understand how they manage to recruit anyone over here, perhaps they don't and it's a big empty white elephant.

I dunno, If I were still in the UK I might join just to be different.

....ok, I'd be doing it for the magic underpants - who doesn't want magic underpants? - I'd be thrusting and dry humping in them all the time, it wouldn't get old.

[MadamI'madaM]

I have a friend who got drunk and split his head open on our Mormon friend's trampoline.

[Limey]

I have a friend who got drunk and split his head open on our Mormon friend's trampoline.

Did he bounce right back from his injuries?

[MadamI'madaM]

Did he bounce right back from his injuries?

No, but the hostess freaked the fuck out and practically spilled IPA all over his face to mask the somewhat less topical alcohol stench. Her parents thought he was sooo fucked from the fall since he was drunk, they were about ready to settle out of court.

It was some time in highschool.

[BAJ]

BAJ finds this link: http://www.askgramps.org/why-do-so-many-mormons-have-trampolines/

This was the number one hit on google. This thread is number two on google. Congrats!

From the above link:

Now back to the trampoline. It is obvious that with an average household density not that much higher than the national average, trampolines are not used by Mormon families as an energy outlet because of an inordinate number of children in the family. However, there may be a reason for a higher number of trampolines in Mormon families that is related to their culture. Sports activities are part of the youth programs for both the young men and young women in the Mormon Church. Basketball leagues are sponsored for young men between the ages of 16 and 18, and also for young adults. Volley ball leagues are sponsored for the young women. So the youth of the Mormon Church are rather sports oriented, and trampolines are nothing more than an additional recreational activity that would appeal to any sports oriented youth.




Another link, this one is sort of funny:
http://ganchoverseas.blogspot.com/2006/12/and-god-said-bounce.html

[Pantycrickets]

I have a theory.
Lots of kids = has trampoline for entertainment
Mormon = Lots of kids
Therefore
Mormon= has trampoline for entertainment

[Oso Mocoso]

I have a theory.
Lots of kids = has trampoline for entertainment
Mormon = Lots of kids
Therefore
Mormon= has trampoline for entertainment

Your theory sounds pretty sound. Good work, Pantycrickets.

[djm]

No, but the hostess freaked the fuck out and practically spilled IPA all over his face to mask the somewhat less topical alcohol stench. Her parents thought he was sooo fucked from the fall since he was drunk, they were about ready to settle out of court.

It was some time in highschool.

Why would pouring beer over the wound help? They should have just let mim drink a pint of it, well so long as was a decent brew like Green King. Good beer is hard to find in the US, one would have thought that it should be considered sinful to waste it by bouncing followers of mormonism.

[sandwich]

From my experience, IPA is not good beer.

In my first scan, I thought Adam was referring to the International Phonetic Alphabet.

[Awn]

In my first scan, I thought Adam was referring to the International Phonetic Alphabet.

That's all I could think of! I've never heard of IPA the beer.

[Limey]

I once poured a can of Skol lager down the back of a 16 yr old, corpulent sikh as we celebrated leaving school. He had laid down in the park in some dog shit and we were trying to wash it off (yeah, with beer). We succeeded in making him smell like beer and shit, it was a double scrabble bonus kinda day.

[MadamI'madaM]

Ha, I meant isopropyl alcohol.

EDIT: I knew I'd heard the abbreviation before, but I forgot about India pale ales since I've never actually had one.

[avolkiteshvara]

EDIT: I knew I'd heard the abbreviation before, but I forgot about India pale ales since I've never actually had one.

And yet Foxy Methoxy somehow made it into your vocab?

[MadamI'madaM]

And yet Foxy Methoxy somehow made it into your vocab?

Ethanol is old hat, it's all about aromaticity these days.

[djm]

From my experience, IPA is not good beer.

In my first scan, I thought Adam was referring to the International Phonetic Alphabet.

Heretic

Most beer over there is pretty awful though in fairness. If you ever get over to the UK we have some great beers. Actually the whole of Europe has great beers, it's one big beerfest in our continent. And no dorms either, thank goodness I am from the old world.

[Tuuli]

I think trampolines are dangerous. If you have many kids, you can get one, so if one of the kids gets killed in a trampoline accident, you still have enough left. If you only have one or two kids, you shouldn't get a trampoline. Or at least make sure you and your family has health insurance.

[djm]

I think trampolines are dangerous. If you have many kids, you can get one, so if one of the kids gets killed in a trampoline accident, you still have enough left. If you only have one or two kids, you shouldn't get a trampoline. Or at least make sure you and your family has health insurance.

I have three - kids not trampolines (just one of them) so on that basis I am ok then. They are only dangerous if you are a moron (as opposed to a mormon, sometimes but not always).

[Tanner]

I am not mormon, but I got a trampoline for my 17th birthday recently. On nice days I might spend and hour or two on it. I philosophize on it whilst cross training for skiing.

[shmrie]

hmm, I've never had a trampoline, but a lot of my grown up siblings(and being from a mormon family, there are a lot of them) have or have had trampolines, but it seems like they always fall into disrepair and our quickly gotten rid of.

[gardnerj]

the thread title made me laugh

[Limey]

I wonder if Mormon Families on trampolines would be niche. The mother would have had to have had the kids early, at their late teens minimum of course and then if the father has a pre existing medical condition, such as a hernia.....ahh fuck it, what about Mormons on the job, mormons gone wild (which my include just smoking and drinking) and Mormon haberdashery.

[qualia]

One of my exes, one I'm still friendly with, was raised Mormon, but abandoned it. He was still close to his parents and younger siblings.

They owned a trampoline.

[Limey]

One of my exes, one I'm still friendly with, was raised Mormon, but abandoned it. He was still close to his parents and younger siblings.

They owned a trampoline.

Could he only become aroused with you while on it?

[qualia]

Could he only become aroused with you while on it?Oh, what the fuck? :thelook:

[Limey]

Oh, what the fuck? :thelook:

I'm just trying to gauge how much he loved that little old trampoline...

[Neville]

Mormon checking in. Trampoline sex is awesome.

[qualia]

I'm just trying to gauge how much he loved that little old trampoline...What is this, e-frotteurism?

[Limey]

What is this, e-frotteurism?

no no! - I was just looking for my lens cap.
I'm keeping score as to whether your vote is one for predeistned trampoline ownsership based on a pre disposed love of bouncing.

FWIW, I have a Trampoline.

[qualia]

I don't think I've ever not wanted to know someone has a trampoline before. Thanks, this has been special.

[HoneyCyclical]

Mormon checking in. Trampoline sex is awesome.

So you are still a Mormon?

[sandwich]

ahh fuck it, what about Mormons on the job, mormons gone wild (which my include just smoking and drinking) and Mormon haberdashery.

Drinking.... caffeine? The scandal! For the love of all that's sacred, keep your trespasses away from the trampoline.

[Limey]

Mormon checking in. Trampoline sex is awesome.

huh...
I wonder if that moon I saw earlier was waxing or waning.

[Neville]

So you are still a Mormon?

I don't know. Technically, I guess.

[HoneyCyclical]

I don't know. Technically, I guess.


Do you believe that Joseph Smith received golden plates from an angel and that those golden plates are the Book of Mormon....from which you practice?
If so, you're mormon. If not, you're not mormon.

[Limey]

...and don't waste our time if you're not mormon. Only hard and fast Mormons need apply.

[Neville]

Do you believe that Joseph Smith received golden plates from an angel and that those golden plates are the Book of Mormon....from which you practice?
If so, you're mormon. If not, you're not mormon.

Technically, as in I've yet to be excommunicated.

[HoneyCyclical]

...and don't waste our time if you're not mormon. Only hard and fast Mormons need apply.

That's right. No halfies muddying up the results!


Technically, as in I've yet to be excommunicated.
I see.

[Limey]

Technically, as in I've yet to be excommunicated.

What inanimate objects are they still communicating to you through?

[Neville]

What inanimate objects are they still communicating to you through?

I'm not at liberty to divulge our means of communication.

[HoneyCyclical]

Undies....hello.

[Limey]

I'm not at liberty to divulge our means of communication.


I once saw Mary in the Marmite on some toast, I smelled and tasted her yeasty goodness, it was great.


Undies....hello.

If my underwear could talk, it would say "hurmf furff derf buff!"

[HoneyCyclical]

So, Neville...were you raised Latter Day Saint? And if so, were you raised a vegetarian?

[Neville]

So, Neville...were you raised Latter Day Saint? And if so, were you raised a vegetarian?

Yes. No.

[HoneyCyclical]

Hmmm. I once stayed at a Latter Day Saint hospital as a teenager. It was quite handy for me since I was a vegetarian.

[Neville]

Hmmm. I once stayed at a Latter Day Saint hospital as a teenager. It was quite handy for me since I was a vegetarian.

Can't say I know a single mormon vegetarian. Sure it wasn't a Seventh Day Adventist hospital?

[HoneyCyclical]

Can't say I know a single mormon vegetarian. Sure it wasn't a Seventh Day Adventist hospital?

Yep. It was Seventh Day Adventist. Probably mixed them in my mind because of the "Day".

[sandwich]

Speaking of underwear..... Neville, do you wear (check all that apply):
[ ] boxers
[ ] briefs
[ ] purity suit

[HoneyCyclical]

[ ] wrestling tights
[ ] underoos

[Neville]

Speaking of underwear..... Neville, do you wear (check all that apply):
[X ] boxers
[X] briefs
[ ] purity suit


[x] wrestling tights
[ ] underoos

Boxer briefs. I assume the purity suit means temple garments. If so, no, I've not done the crazy endowment thingy. Thus no planet for me.