I think I am so sad that I am actually annoyed

[garak]

Man, it is "one of those days." I fucking hate days like this, where I am just so miserable and pathetic that I can barely put up with myself. I drove around aimlessly with music blaring earlier and that helped, but you can only do so much aimless driving. I need a fucking social life or something. I need SOMETHING to occupy my time other than sitting at the computer with my brain constantly working and working and working and making me feel like shit.

<cue unbelievable amounts of lameness (this is rants and raves, damn it)>



incubus - "i miss you"

To see you when I wake up
Is a gift I didn't think could be real.
To know that you feel the same as I do
Is a three-fold, Utopian dream.
You do something to me that I can't explain.
So would I be out of line if I said,
"I miss you"?
I see your picture,
I smell your skin on
The empty pillow next to mine.
You have only been gone ten days,
But already I'm wasting away.
I know I'll see you again
Whether far or soon.
But I need you to know that I care,
And I miss you.

[Trolsk]

What are you going to do about it?

[garak]

Post a pathetic thread on a message board? :)

(if I knew what to do I'd probably be doing it)

[songbird36]

How about having a rant at me?

It'll make you feel better..

:lol:

[Warrior413]

Post a pathetic thread on a message board? :)

(if I knew what to do I'd probably be doing it)
That makes a lot of sense. Um, good luck then.

[garak]

How about having a rant at me?

It'll make you feel better..

:lol:
Actually that wouldn't make me feel better at all. :(

But uh.. thanks for your .. generosity? :confused:

[garak]

That makes a lot of sense. Um, good luck then.
Eh? I can't tell if you're being sarcastic here or what.

[Warrior413]

Eh? I can't tell if you're being sarcastic here or what.
I think it was genuine.

[songbird36]

Be good if we could all sit round in a chatty circle and have some drinks together..

lol

[garak]

Heh, then thanks, I think. :)

[Trolsk]

A good change of environment for a couple of weeks usually work wonders.

[Shai Gar]

snuffles... or something

[garak]

A good change of environment for a couple of weeks usually work wonders.
Would be nice, too. Can't really do so at the moment, but I'm guessing this will have passed by tomorrow (or the next day) anyways.

[MasterMerk]

I've been through a similar thing. There's that boredom, and accompanying disgust that tells you you should be out doing more. I hate that.

[garak]

And then add a heaping dose of love sickness on top. And school, work, money, and the general question of where the hell is my life going?

[Helios]

Man I feel for you, I been there too, but thankfully my friends bailed me out by calling out tonite, I can't go out solo. I know where you at, I really wish I could do more to help cause I know it sucks, and besides I am drunk now and all F and stuff

[Trolsk]

One of the better ways to deal with depression (in the long run) is to make sure that one's body is healthy, through nutrition, work-out and steady habits to which the body can adapt.

[Helios]

Hush, don't forget getting wasted and having crazy sex!

[Helios]

Hey maybe this is dumb, so forgive me, but we should all met sometime in like NYC or La or something and go out, a big ol bunch of INTPs, it would be a blast, we could all support each other ,get tanked and have a blast!

[garak]

How about Iowa :p

[file cabinet]

I asked some girl I rarely chat with if I could stay at her place when I needed to take a "break" or something.. I asked if I could sleep on her floor.. she said yes.. hopefully I can drive down there at some point.. maybe you have something like that you can ask? to get away from it all..

[DevNull]

FWIW, Mack, you are a rock for me here. I would not have faith in the whole INTP thing if it wasn't for people like you.

I guess the only advice I have (foregoing using you as yet another social experiment for my own INTP amusement and study) is to suggest that you survey your kingdom. It has been written that us INTP types have some sort of quirky storage thing going on, where we box up our interests for later use. This later use of stored things may not, and often does not, ever happen, but we are quite content knowing that we can go back to that stored nut any time we wish. I am comforted by surveying my many stored things. These things are not always tangible items, mind you. I have never seen it written anywhere, but I have extended my penchant for INTP storage to the social realm. I make contacts and plant seeds of friendship for later use if needed. It is a tricky skill for me, but I am getting quite good at it. But back to the surveying.....

You will not escape your rut by driving aimlessly with cool tunes playing. You may acquire some handy pieces in your travels to help later, but you will not find what you are looking for. Survey your kingdom and see what pleases you and build upon it. The answer to your rut is inside you, not out there somewhere. Going away is not going to clear your head. Observing your own realm is a much better way of piecing together the clues of what troubles you and what fires you up.

Fellow INTP's are a great help too, of course. So Helios is quite on the mark here in this thread. Since we are 1% of the population then that just adds to the fact that a random venture to the outside world is non-productive in a mathematical way :)

Survey that kingdom, Mack.

[Helios]

I'll call your bluff! Lets met in Iowa, hell we can have a barn raising or something! If someone else will commit to going there I'll do it! Ummm how about 2 more people that would be good, two more and I am game!

[garak]

HeliosIsDrunk < (ecnetuser@ecnet-6BFA02CB.tmp1-4.28.188.38.tmp1.dsl-verizon.net) has quit [Quit: HeliosIsDrunk]

Heh, I'm game.

[Crazy]

Cheer up Mac, it could be worse.

I wish I had more to say, but my "give a damn" is busted.

[garak]

Maybe you could say I'm having an INFJ moment. I feel like I am "addicted to love" as Robert Palmer put it, and I have been deprived and withdrawal is kicking in. I gotta get my fix!


(04:14:38) jackie: i love you, nick
(04:14:50) jackie: and it's not going to change.

/me stops trudging through aim logs :(

[Crazy]

I hate being in that kinda place. Read the thread "The Good Life" in "Rants and Raves" and then you may have a glimps into why my Fe isn't working right now.

[indie]

Not to laugh at you, garak, (I'm not) but it's kind of funny that you titled this thread "I *think* I'm so sad . . ." like you are afraid to admit you are sad, so you're blaming it upon some likely defective part of your brain? We INTPs understand about that: I THINK I feel, I THINK I feel. . .

Personally, I've felt quite similar lately and am so looking forward to my departure from the humdrum in a couple weeks. I'm going to be flying to Vegas and then taking a leisurely drive to Utah to visit my brother. There will definitly be some "lame" music blasting. And, possibly singing. :)

[PonderBee]

Park the car and go for a walk. Fill your lungs and clear your head.
Get out of your head & use your body, go out & do something physical .. rock climbing, snowboarding, manual labor, whatever works for you.

[Heather Harrison]

I have also felt this way at times (albeit minus the love-sick part; that part of me is dead). For some reason, the aimless driving thing helps me a lot. Near where I live, there are endless expanses of deserts to explore and driving or hiking through them is very relaxing. (But desert hiking doesn't work in the summer when it is too hot; then, I go to the nearby mountains.) Even a one- or two-day camping trip can help. Being out in nature clears my head and gives me the motivation to go on, and I often come back from the trip with numerous ideas for projects which I can start and not finish.

A few weeks ago, I felt this way. I got together with a friend and we drove out to the desert, intending to explore part of the Pony Express Road area. Turning south from the Pony Express Road, and going about 10-15 miles, we found a lovely canyon, called "Death Canyon". We got out and walked around there a little, but then we got back in the car and kept driving. Before the day was out, we had driven about 450 miles round-trip and we went through the towns of Iosepa, Delta, Flowell, Meadow, Kanosh, Richfield, Salina and Scipio before heading back to Salt Lake. I felt great after returning.

This works for me, but I guess it doesn't necessarily work for everyone. I think the secret for me is to get out into a natural environment, and not play any music - the silence is relaxing. And getting out of the car and walking around is very helpful.

Heather Harrison

[Star]

I'd say post something like this on a forum or irc, or send lovesick notes to all your ex's. In a few days you'll be so embarrassed at how pathetic you were that you're sure to shape up and get on with your life. Until the next time..

It works for me! :blush:

[Warrior413]

Listen up mack! Get your head out of your ass you sorry maggot! Drop down and give me twenty-five!

[/R. Lee Ermey]

[songbird36]

Ah can we make the meet up in Hawaii?

It's a bit closer to me, and MUCH warmer..

:lol:

[2hype]

lol. I'd meet in Iowa.

[Star]

Meetup? :blink:

"What? you mean people actually talk to each other using mouths and ears instead of keyboards?"

[Warrior413]

I wouldn't go to a meetup. This is good/bad enough...

Well, maybe eventually.

[garak]

I'd probably go to one, although I am somewhat apathetic about it.

The worst possible thing happened last night -- she finally popped on aim and I started blabbing about how I felt like shit, until, what do you know, her internet connection flaked out and I had no response. Awesome.

Long distances suck ass. :rant:

(well it wasn't the worst thing possible, at least I still got to talk to her)

[prometheusdestroyed]

at least I still got to talk to her

I don't have a 'her'. Oh, where is my angel <pine,pine>

[garak]

whew. Finally got to really talk to her, and I feel about a million times better.

[Clara]

Things seem to be brighter than garak thought they were, at the start of this thread :) & *whooo hoooo !*

So, I'm easier in my mind, about developing this side-track ( connected, but ) :
DevNull, I agree totally with what you posted :) but, a little mystified... Did you think that what you were saying differed from what Hush suggested, in his two posts prevoius to yours ? Because, going through a "reorganization," myself, currently... it really strikes me that you're saying very similar things.

To specify : if one "goes away" for a while ( preferably, geographically :) ) ... when one gets "home" again, one's perspective has changed. ( And, inevitably, one started thinking about such thing, while away. ) Don't ya'll think so too ?

[Miss Anthropic]

Hey maybe this is dumb, so forgive me, but we should all met sometime in like NYC or La or something and go out, a big ol bunch of INTPs, it would be a blast, we could all support each other ,get tanked and have a blast!
LOL! That would be funny. We would all have to have nametags with our avatars on them....I vote for LA. Sorry Mac, Iowa doesn't sound very exciting.

[Vagabond]

I vote for Athens :p

Stop thinking about country limits people.

[Clara]

I second "Athens" ;P

[DevNull]

Did you think that what you were saying differed from what Hush suggested, in his two posts prevoius to yours ?

I am on the older tip here in INTPland, being 35. Been there, done it all, settled, satisfied, and now waiting to die while content to simply observe this awesome thing called life without those nagging hormones ruling my life exclusively :)

That said, it is quite the excellent point you brought up and worthy of a whole thread. (Even though I may screw up your aim).

I did not pause to think about Hush's posts and in fact did not even really notice them until you prompted me to. If I did, they must have registered as typical teenage-style fluff. This is not to say that Hush is wrong or I am right, but from my personal POV I see no reason to go complicate one's life with yet another outside distraction when the answers often lie inside in plain view. The clues are so there and we INTPs are neurally equipped to get to the bottom of such things without drama... much to the consternation of those who need Dr. Phil to give them guidance. I mean, how many times have you wanted to smack someone upside the head and say "Dude, take a good look at things in your life. Use your head.".

I am all for going out there and "finding yourself" whether it be a quick drive or a move, but from experience, it must be done on the upswing lest it becomes a distraction.

(I am often known for missing the point in discussion BTW, so do let me know if that is the case)

The brother of the guy who owns Amazon.com once gave me a great bit of advice. He told me that if you cannot sell your idea in four seconds then your idea is doomed to fail. In that light, my "elevator pitch" on this topic is: Make sure your life is in good shape before you go running from it for any reason.

And as for perspective on one's own life..... the internet will do. You could drive for days without seeing what one can see here.

[garak]

Well like I mentioned, I talked to Jackie earlier and let her know how I feel. Her response was exactly what I needed. Lately she has been around less, and it seemed like I had not spoken to the "F" her in a while, and I missed it a lot. It was really bothering me.

I have also been a bit bummed about what exactly to DO with myself right now. I want to expand my E, S, and J (so to speak), but it just seems like I can't figure out HOW. She had the perfect suggestion -- martial arts. It is something I have thought about before, and when she mentioned it, I could feel my internal fears of action and change (which I want so badly to change) popping up, but I resisted from shooting down the idea, and looked into it. Now I definitely want to do it (although I still am a little afraid). I am going to email this local kung fu guy sometime before I go to bed, and try to get myself in there next week.

I guess it's a lesson that you can only self-sufficient to a certain extent. Other people can really make a huge difference. (and a good one, at that :))

(BTW, the fact that this is something I had considered previously and "stored for later" kind of ties in with what you said, DevNull (which I really took to heart despite not replying to it))

[Helios]

I vote for Athens :p

Stop thinking about country limits people.


Well Athens it is, but you have to co-ordinate now! ;P

[Architectonic]

I am on the older tip here in INTPland, being 35. Been there, done it all, settled, satisfied, and now waiting to die while content to simply observe this awesome thing called life without those nagging hormones ruling my life exclusively :)

Really? To be perfectly honest, that sounds rather "J".

I (personally) don't ever believe you (not you personally) can ever have been there and done it all.

[DevNull]

Really? To be perfectly honest, that sounds rather "J".

I (personally) don't ever believe you (not you personally) can ever have been there and done it all.

I refer you to my thread where I explain that my father is an INTJ and the nut does not fall far from the tree.

I do, however, modify my "been there, done it all" to "been there, done that".

Touche.

Now can I point out how INTJ *you* sound? :)

[songbird36]

I refer you to my thread where I explain that my father is an INTJ and the nut does not fall far from the tree.

I do, however, modify my "been there, done it all" to "been there, done that".

Touche.

Now can I point out how INTJ *you* sound? :)

Yeah he's so quick to judge...

I reckon you're INTJ Architec :lol:

[Architectonic]

Thanks for the compliment, I've been working hard at it.

I'm also working on my "E", its part of my transitionary plan to become ENTJ.

[songbird36]

Thanks for the compliment, I've been working hard at it.

I'm also working on my "E", its part of my transitionary plan to become ENTJ.

At which point you will be hounded off the forum with arrows protruding from your back...

[Architectonic]

Not if I don't tell them. :devil:

Remember, with all of my experience, I should be able to do a great pseudo-INTP.