The Collective Wisdom of INTP Central

[indie]

Some of the statements made on this board have been particularly hilarious, insightful, or just plain strange when taken out of context (at least to me). And, since I’ve been collecting these random quotes for awhile now (the list is getting a little long), I thought I’d share them with you.

Please feel free to add on, bury the thread, shoot me down with lasers, etc.


:cheers:


“The theory of everything: Zen.” ~Sackanaka

“Here at INTP Central, we believe in the value of efficiency. We are currently developing methods to hide bodies with maximum efficiency and are nearing a major breakthrough in our research. We will get back to you after we are done working on these 4 other projects simultaneously.” ~Zero Angel

“And I will once again say how can there be a tree in the first place if there is no atmosphere?” ~Dman

“Okay, now I'm REALLY convinced that genius and insanity go together. Just take a look at this forum. It's proof enough!” ~Creative Chaos

"Hamburgers! The cornerstone of every nutritious breakfast." ~Edmond Zedo

“In the Grand Scheme, it's just one personality hoping to find out exactly what the Grand Scheme is.” ~int

“Well, how do strawberry jams feel about it?” ~Lee

“Yeah, the problem is that some people prefer to fight without armor, while others would rather dress up like a medieval knight.” ~Boneca

“I Love Anything except cranberry sauce... Everything else is Tasty Tasty Tasty.” ~Yard Gnome

“One reply? Bastards. You'll all be sorry when the earth goes to hell!” ~Dman

“Yes, I think ‘Adopt a happy attitude’ is not always the most fruitful policy.” ~Clara

“I am really torn by the need for money versus my extreme distaste for all that it represents.” ~waxwing

“Gentlemen I refuse to allow this to be corrupted into a discussion of J-Lo's attributes (physical or otherwise).” ~ songbird34

“Not so much ‘what’, but ‘why’. Basically, the reason for collapse of the Soviet Union is a highly controversial and debated issue, and the ultimate reasons are not common knowledge. It was Santa. I am not sure how he did it, but, you know, it couldn't have been difficult for him.” ~melancholeric

“I really enjoy rearranging furniture, both literally and figuratively.” ~waxwing

“Like the theory of infinite universes which all exist frozen like a lattice where each universe is surrounded by those which are closest to it so that by this theory we only exist in instants but the universe is different than commonly thought as relativity has shown and in particular neither time nor space are absolute quantities in a way that every entity will agree about them and there are no x y z t coordinates which are something like an artists guidelines designed to fit into a mathematical framework for humans an opinion i am sure Descartes will forgive me for so a lattice of universes would likely not be populated by a temporal index” ~Network Alchemy

“Tourists would be a good protein source. But most probably contain a lot of unhealthy fat.” ~Boneca

“If you dont spell things correctly I will fucking kill you.” ~Arcael

“I have never even tried to make sense, such a futile attempt would be doomed to fail in my case.” ~melencholeric

“Ideas are great to think of, but sometimes you need to come back to earth to build a skyscraper.” ~Shai Gar

“I don't remember what my parents said to me... obviously nothing worth remembering”. ~fci

“It always amazes me how everyone really lives in their own little reality.” ~jetboots.

“I guess we'd have to ask, what has Jesus done for us lately. Sure hasn't broughten me any presents on his birthday. Lazy bastard.” ~mgbradsh

“I don’t know. Sometimes I feel like albino midgets have been around for so long, just thinking about them makes me feel all safe and warm and SJ-ish inside.” ~booyalab

“What?! I thought GOD wrote the bible!” ~Dman

“wisdom = understanding that much of life "makes no sense at all," and the shortest distance between to points doesn't make for travel/ broadening one's horizons” ~Clara

“I'd agree with you, but that's not legal here.” ~joft

“This all reminds me of the time the Mensa group tried to run Springfield. They failed.” ~mgbradsh

“The most brilliant people in the world can have stupid ideas.” ~MacGuffin.

“I hate to gush, but this is the most inspiring shit I've ever read.” ~s0523

“Does anyone else think it's a bit easier to have an existential crisis when you're an INTP?” ~joft

“I think anyone who doesn't educate themselves is pretty much a loost case to begin with.” ~ApetheDog

“The opposite of love is not hate, but indifference. For that reason measuring the relationship should be done by the degree of emotional feelings shown.” ~INTrPosr

“Stuff like that makes me proud to be grown up, and schizoid.” ~deepsky

“No I don't find it particularly amazing. The cows are part of businesses and the farmers have good reasons to keep track of them.” ~garak

“Those anal retentives. Too tight a grip.” ~Geoff

“Geniuses destroy previous structure and replace it with their own.” ~cjs55

“I ate ground bison/buffalo last month. They had it at my (upscale) grocery store. I raped it with ketchup.” ~Div

“You're all nuts.” ~Dman

[melancholeric]

The last quote seemed particularly fitting in that context.

[Star]

Oh! I was thinking about a thread like this last night, so I already have a few in mind.



MacGuffin: I am too old to fuck 17 year olds.
[followed by]
CreativeChaos: Haaa!!! Everytime I see that Avatar, it's like
*Darth Vadar points with his finger and says in deep mechanic voice"
"I'm to old to fuck 17 year olds"

Miss Anthropic: Ah, welcome one and all to the chapter meeting of The He-Man Woman-Haters Club!

Thermo: I logically proved my points, you gave me opinions with little substance.

booyalab: *ironygasms*

Niflheimian - every time s/he manages to correct someone's spelling or grammar without seeming curmudgeonly or even making anyone mad. (How, how?)



And this is just one of my favorite posts ever:

No, Virginia, Democracy does not exist and cannot exist (http://forums.intpcentral.com/showpost.php?p=76583&postcount=32) by Claverhouse.

edit: I'll add more later... that's a great list, indiejade. =)

[2hype]

Nice collection.

[Lee]

I was thinking about something like this just yesterday....very good choices :)

[Crazy]

That is a great list, and the additions are awesome, however (comma, pause for effect) calling it wisdom is probably a bit of a stretch, or I could be way off here.

[songbird36]

There seems to be a common theme here - obsession with the existential qualities of food..

[Shai Gar]

only got quoted once. :(

spose i should up the quality of my posts, yeah, or hit indiejade around the head with his own arm.

[melancholeric]

No, the quality of your posts is juuust fine.

It's the quantity that bothers me. We need more of these fascinating threads like
"fuck 17 year old girls", "FUCK WOMEN ALTOGETHER", "FUCK THIS WEEKEND AND FUCK ME, I AM A FUCKING CHICKEN SHIT." that you always come up with.

[Sir Isaac Lime]

Deepsky, are you really schizoid?

[songbird36]

only got quoted once. :(

spose i should up the quality of my posts, yeah, or hit indiejade around the head with his own arm.

"Fuck women" is just so deep and Zen it's not funny...

[Crazy]

There seems to be a common theme here - obsession with the existential qualities of food..

Admit it, it's difficult to resist the allure of strawberry jam.

[songbird36]

Yeah it's a great sex aid.

Nutella is pretty good too...

[Star]

Deepsky, are you really schizoid?

Like, with a doctor's note? No.

I think I fit the description.

[indie]

Thanks. There were a lot of other funny/insightful/strange ones I wanted to add along the way, but got distracted before I was able to . . . you know how distraction goes.

My *very* favorite quote is waxwing's "I really enjoy rearranging furniture, both literally and figuratively" :rofl: I don't know why that is so funny to me, but it is. (out of context, I mean)


only got quoted once. :(

spose i should up the quality of my posts, yeah, or hit indiejade around the head with his own arm.

"His" own arm? After all our friendly bonding and such, you really still think I'm a guy? ;)

[songbird36]

I think that means he respects you Indie (calling you a guy)..

[Shai Gar]

i respect women too, i resent the connotation that i dont.

but now that i know i shall remember it.

[Star]

Why am I the only other one posting a quote list.

[songbird36]

i respect women too, i resent the connotation that i dont.

but now that i know i shall remember it.

Ah so the "Fuck women" mentality is your drunk/psychotic evil twin?

lol

[C.J.Woolf]

Why am I the only other one posting a quote list.
Because the rest of us are too lazy to compile one?

Anyway, I laugh at and admire a lot of posts but I haven't captured any. I'm glad you do.

[songbird36]

Hey - so who's for a big INTP Central meet-up in Hawaii (maybe end of this year)?

I think we all need to eyeball each other...

[Miss Anthropic]

only got quoted once. :(

spose i should up the quality of my posts, yeah, or hit indiejade around the head with his own arm.
Quality over quantity.....substance over numbers on your way to another nickname....

[Miss Anthropic]

Why am I the only other one posting a quote list.
Because the rest of us are too lazy, and just appreciative of you two who are so motivated!

[Solo]

This is a good idea. I don't have any to add but I'll be on the look out for good ones.

[Crazy]

Hey - so who's for a big INTP Central meet-up in Hawaii (maybe end of this year)?

I think we all need to eyeball each other...

Make that southern California and I'm in. Woohooo!! I love eyeballs!

[Architectonic]

For INTP Central to have collective wisdom, would require us to have wisdom (at least some of us), and I'm not entirely sure if thats the case.

[Crazy]

For INTP Central to have collective wisdom, would require us to have wisdom (at least some of us), and I'm not entirely sure if thats the case.

And one of us would have to be wise enough to discern what is wisdom, then go and collect it.

[songbird36]

Seriously I'd like to meet some of you.

Especially the ones who hate me, so we can throw things at each other..

:lol:

[Crazy]

Well, I don't hate you songbird, but I will still throw things at you.

[songbird36]

Ooooh goody - just make sure it's jars of Nutella..

:lol:

[Biff_Loman]

Songbird, I know you want to do me, but I'm taken.

I should probably cut back on the impulse posts.

[indie]

For INTP Central to have collective wisdom, would require us to have wisdom (at least some of us), and I'm not entirely sure if thats the case.


That is a great list, and the additions are awesome, however (comma, pause for effect) calling it wisdom is probably a bit of a stretch, or I could be way off here.

OR. . . just maybe, titling the thread "The Collective Wisdom of INTP Central" was my way of enhancing the irony. ;)

[sbw]

Ooooh goody - just make sure it's jars of Nutella..

:lol:

It might hurt less if you take it out of the jars first.

Scott

[Architectonic]

OR. . . just maybe, titling the thread "The Collective Wisdom of INTP Central" was my way of enhancing the irony. ;)

Very clever.






Cleverness, as differentiated from wisdom.......

[indie]

“It would be so incredibly hot if there was a smiley whose head exploded.” ~Eileen the INFJ

“I can't drive. I don't know why the DMV gave me a license... I feel sorry for the people that are on the roads with me.” ~”InsertNameHere”

“Oh I'm terrified of death, even more so than dogs....” Sam172

“And I just tooki Ambien and won't remember any of this tomorrow. . .” ~jread

“To face life is to face death...it's just something I have no choice in and apparently it's natural, so I have to accept it - since I can't do anything else about it.” ~int

“No, there was no one around to ‘know’ that there was ‘one’ less dinosaur. Not just the number ‘1’ but the very concept of ‘1’ hadn't existed yet. You need a human around to think up the very idea of ‘1’ whether they call it ‘3’ or ‘mzhwx.’ Ask the saber tooth tigers and wooly mammoths.” ~s0523

“It that an Oxisidised Moron!” ~Aryan

“Oh yeah... self-confidence is the most over-rated thing on earth. As are self-confident people's erroneous estimations of themselves. ~Claverhouse

“Language bootstraps ideas into collectively usable constructs. It can be decieving in a cultural sense, but I can't really say that it's entirely inhibiting.” ~Sir Isaac Lime

“I feel like a failure for not also establishing an evil empire based on stupid movies and Wal-mart clothing.” jimkopelli

“Just remember... There is a universal human aversion to blue food.” ~Heather Harrison

“Yawning someone to death is not a crime, right”? ~Vagabond

“But u know, if it walks like a duck, if it talks like a duck, it still may be Roseanne” ~n0mad

“But I hoard money... and would rearrange furniture if I had any.” ~coffeezombie

“I think I am so sad that I am actually annoyed.” ~garak

“i cant believe how much interesting and useful information there is avaliable on the net, sometimes i search for a random phrase such as "i hate bees" and i will get results and read them.” ~hamro

“Objectification is all right because it is fun.” ~Hush

“It's strange that the insecurity that breeds wisdom is socially/sexually unattractive.” Sir Isaac Lime

“SJ's are like excel spreadsheets, poorly designed but with excellent input.” ~Lee

“I used to take some things seriously, but then I grew up.” ~melancholeric

“Some of the absolute smartest people I've known have been maids...” ~tragula

“For those whom english is not their native language, we tend to be very accepting of their spelling and grammar errors. Oh, don't get me wrong, we will constantly correct you but we will not be mean about it” ~Shai Gar

“How many nurses does it take to restrain a sedated techno-weenie?” ~Edmond Zedo

“My bad one was: "The vaccuum cleaner" kiss.” ~sb34

“Yawning someone to death is not a crime, right”? ~Vagabond

“Ahh, welcome to the intP speciality, the 'let us start the project' after we should have finished it syndrome.” ~Geoff

“Didn't stop me from thinking I might be an alien, though.” ~s0523

“The worst kiss is one not returned, when you honestly, honestly thought it would be.” ~biff loman

“I feel your ennui.” ~deepsky


:cheers:

[Lee]

Wonderful :)

I don't see any indiejade quotes?

[s0978]

Aw, now I wish I'd been collecting them too. But if there was one post which prompted me to register as a member, it would have been:


Has anyone called the Spazz Police yet? *beep boop beep bop beep bop boop.....bbbrinngggg...* -Zedo

Kind of mean, and I have to say that I did feel badly for the recipient of this comment, but I laughed until I had tears in my eyes, and have even gone back to laugh some more.

[songbird36]

Songbird, I know you want to do me, but I'm taken.

I should probably cut back on the impulse posts.

me too..hehe

[indie]

me too..hehe

Careful, sb. One of the "quotes" I cut from the list was something about you talking about being all done with breeding. Not because it (the quote) wasn't funny, merely because the list was getting too long.

;)

[Dman]

/me snuggles songbird

(in reference to above post) *vomits involuntarily* *still feels nauseous* *induces further vomiting*





Ahem. Back on topic RE: "How Gay is That?" I really don't think the word "that" is gay at all.
…

Isn't that a fascinating word, "point"? So . . . what *is* the point?
Ah, yes. Here we go . . .
…

(From ‘Abortion’ thread) I'd respond with an alogical statement, but this thread is still in its "fetus" stage.
.

[Sackanaka]

:D

[Dman]

I’ve been meaning to post this one here for quite a while but kept forgetting. It’s one of my all time favorites – makes me laugh every time I read it:

(from the “Edmond Zedo’s Naming” thread)



Don’t hurt me it’s my first post
Marigold Mushroom Lemon Grove



*stab stab stab stab stab*

Poor bastard, I don’t think he ever posted again!

[Ascending]

The trick is standing out as a creative problem solver rather than a disorganised liability, to be honest.
-Geoff

[Ascending]

ROFL Dman, thanks.

*edit* 9th or so time I've read the above, still laughing.

[Ascending]

I was diagnosed with ADD some years ago but never really payed attention to it.
Thanks to athman for pointing that out. http://forums.intpcentral.com/images/smilies/tongue10.gif

[Star]

I found it. :D

http://fizzyassgravy.com:82/pub/thehunt.png

[Ascending]

know quite a few INTPs who dream of living the life of a homeless wanderer. Sad though...because it upsets those around them. Sadder of course, to hear of a successful lawful disenchanted with work and family turning homeless then losing his life to an alligator while bathing in a canal, a true story. I fall in the middle. Plenty of INTPs have passed me by, while I escape the poverty of the unfortunate few. It's a cruel culling of the INTP population.

What irks me is the feeling that I somehow ride on the reputation of other, more successful INTPs. I'm aggregated within that group and expections follow the stereotype. And so I disappoint...quite often. Sorry, but I'm not "that" kind of INTP. I have my brilliant moments, but they are few. And so I make humbling corrections...ironically when others seem to humble themselves before my supposed intelligence. Yes, I'm sometimes scholarly, but never studious. Smart, but never clever. Perceptive, but never ingenious. Patient, but never wise. Calm, but never sure. Considerate, but never kind. I'm not much of anything, only a little pinch of everything. I'm happy just knowing who I am, but happier when not thinking about happiness. I have only myself and at the end of day, it's one of the few things I can hold onto, the last thing life will take from me.
.

[Claverhouse]

PLACE-HOLDER FOR CLASSIC STATUS

[Sackanaka]

This thread should be updated or at least reincarnated.


chameleons aren't weird enough. I'm an octopus. not only do I blend in, but if discovered, I shoot ink and zip away.

and I have tentacles

[Jasz]

i love joft's “I'd agree with you, but that's not legal here.” though i wouldn't commit to that publicly

[kendoiwan]

I didn't make the list?!?:rant: :dieemo: :whyi: :sadbanana: :threat: :censor: :2up: :wtf: :puppy: ;P :whistle:

[Conan]

I liked this one by kendoiwan.


I didn't make the list?!?:rant: :dieemo: :whyi: :sadbanana: :threat: :censor: :2up: :wtf: :puppy: ;P :whistle:

[Shimpei]

quotes by Al Capwn:

"fuck, we're getting closer"

"The curse of life is that you'll get it, when you don't want it anymore."

"Comeon boys! Destroy this thread!"

"No hidden camera, but definitely a hidden agenda."

"Ella, be my bella!"

"Yea i'm a virgin. Pure and simple."

"My mistake, i made the poll without thinking."

"Oh you mean a republicunt?"

"CC you are destructive! Whats in your DNA, wine?"



And a really relevant quote for this thread:

"I don't want this quote to die!!! Boys!! Keep this quote alive at all costs!" ...

[waxwing]

Does every thread have to deteriorate at the hands of the masses?

(those are lame)

[Claverhouse]

We're dying, Ægypt, dying.

[ seriously ]


Claverhouse :ph34r:

[Shimpei]

Does every thread have to deteriorate at the hands of the masses?

(those are lame)

some more Al Cpwn quotes by popular request:

"waxwing, cause she seems unsatisfied with everything."

"I'll hate to be around someone who takes death so seriously."

"who says you are a person? you are just a little script posting random crap all over the internet using primitive AI."

[Lee]

Al Cpwn is like a crossbreed of headfonez and Hustler, but not as funny as either.

[waxwing]

some more Al Cpwn quotes by popular request:

"waxwing, cause she seems unsatisfied with everything."
Yes, I abhor complacency. Would rather die than be satisfied with the status quo.

[Prozac]

Yes, I abhor complacency. Would rather die than be satisfied with the status quo.


i despise everything just about

would rather die than be satisfied with deteriorating over my lifespan closeout sale

[domokun]

i despise everything just about

would rather die than be satisfied with deteriorating over my lifespan closeout sale
or would rather sell her life at 7 dollars an hour than bitch about being satisfied.

[CosmicOrphan]

See, now Garry Larson would do well in this collection:

[At the 22nd international madscientist convention]

"And now I'd like you to give a nice, warm welcome to the man who first coinded the phrase 'Fools! I'll destroy you all!', Dr. Howard Bekenhiemer..."

[Blue]

you are J, I am P,
what you say
no apply to me



It's always so cute the way you INTPs think you're not emotional and your detritus doesn't stink.On this forum, it doesn't. That's the fucking point.


10 months since the last post. Nothing worth remembering?

[Blue]

Pass the revolver, I am done.
Foreshadowing.

Unto you, I recite God's plan: ""

Born. Lived. Died. That was it.
Wallowing in the existential.


It broke, and Rhu was born.

Because when I am all alone, and look at myself in the mirror - during a disaster - I can usually smile, and say - you have done it again, you loveable idiot.

[indie]

10 months since the last post. Nothing worth remembering?


These were good times. Good times indeed.

I think there's a line that was crossed, a certain number of animated smileys perhaps, that when added to the directory of smileys, began the downward spiral . . .

[Blue]

You can't climb out of the pit if nihilism, you have to quantum tunnel..

[booyalab]

the collective wisdom of INTPc can be found on IRC.

[Blue]

the collective wisdom of INTPc can be found on IRC.No, I don't think so.

[Ponderous]

Not so much "what", but "why". Basically, the reason for collapse of the Soviet Union is a highly controversial and debated issue, and the ultimate reasons are not common knowledge. It was Santa. I am not sure how he did it, but, you know, it couldn't have been difficult for him. ~melancholeric

You're right, because in that part of the world, he did have the help of the Snow Maiden (http://www.russiansantas.com/father-frost.html).

[Harion]

post here the best repartees or banters you've ever read here in INTPc posted by other members (not yours)
posts which you'd consider siggy material

[MacGuffin]

Merged.

[Scarecrow]

NilesEdge's signature, for all those who haven't seen it yet, gets me every time.

Also: (http://forums.intpcentral.com/showthread.php?p=1030048#post1030048)
Idiom: There are a lot of right-wing weirdos on this site.

nonperson: Bless! Thanks. Your complimentary NRA membership is in the post.

MacGuffin: In the MAIL. In the mail, you commie!

---------------------
In a different thread: after a lengthy discussion of whether to legalize marijuana or not (and an infraction for me that will never expire, thank you MacG), the discussion somewhat digresses...


Sometimes, explicitness is a virtue because it discourages leaving things out (i.e. confusing people).


to each their own isn't always possible when explicitness is applied.
edit: the confused are already confused.


See, that's your problem. You can't always blame other people.


I'm not blaming anyone, you are imposing the blame yourself.


You just blamed your audience for the confusion in your posts, to which I say: nay, thou!


You wish your intentions on me when you should be wishing your intentions on yourself.


See, that doesn't exactly mean anything to most people in that context.


See, you wish I would mean something to most people.


Yes, and so do most people.


I suppose that's why I'm glad to be me.


Shut the fuck up you two. Talk about drugs or gtfo.

[MacGuffin]

(and an infraction for me that will never expire, thank you MacG)
I actually had a plan for removing that...

[Scarecrow]

I actually had a plan for removing that...

:ph34r: Did you? :wub:

[MacGuffin]

:ph34r: Did you? :wub:
Yeah, a clemency program.

[Scarecrow]

Yeah, a clemency program.

Not sure whether I am deserving. (Even though I was new and I still think the situation was in a humorous context.)

[MacGuffin]

Not sure whether I am deserving. (Even though I was new and I still think the situation was in a humorous context.)
One offense would qualify.

[Bking]

What pop's in your head when you read "Collective wisdom of intp central"?:thelook:

I think of this big blue ball, bouncing around inside of an empty white room.

[avolkiteshvara]

What pop's in your head when you read "Collective wisdom of intp central"?:thelook:

I think of this big blue ball, bouncing around inside of an empty white room.

I think about computer chip circuits.

[md5fungi]

I misread this thread's title as "The Collective Semen of INTP Central."

A gargantuan glass jar popped into my head.

[carbon cold]

What pop's in your head when you read "Collective wisdom of intp central"?:thelook:

I think of this big blue ball, bouncing around inside of an empty white room.

I think of a bunch of virgins standing in a circle acting like they understand the nature of the universe while secretly trying to figure out which one of the group smells the worst.

Leave the Akashic records to another community.

[Madrigal]

(and an infraction for me that will never expire, thank you MacG)

Pfft I wish I had one of those. :D

[md5fungi]

Pfft I wish I had one of those. :D

You really do. The Infractors are the only cool people on INTPc.

[Imhotep]

I think of a bunch of virgins standing in a circle acting like they understand the nature of the universe while secretly trying to figure out which one of the group smells the worst.

Leave the Akashic records to another community.

:theclap: