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!diom
16 Sep 2008, 11:42 PM
This is about how communication is carried out both in real life and on forums.

Schopenhauer once said that humans are like porcupines out in the cold - We can either huddle up and prick each other, or avoid each other and freeze. Neither is a good option, so we're in a constant struggle to find equilibrium. However, we're all different - Some of us are much more uncomfortable in the cold, and some of us are much more annoyed when pricked.

Linguists say that language is perhaps the strongest measure of where people are most comfortable. Those who choose to keep their distance are much more straightforward and matter-of-fact when they communicate, and they're quick to "get down to business" rather than engaging in small-talk. Those who prefer warmth are the opposite. Even when doing business, debating, or anything else of a serious matter, they never forget they're dealing with human beings. They always keep in mind the characters of the people involved, as well as how they relate to them, and how to maintain or change those relations.

This isn't a distinction between introversion and extroversion. Neither is it a distinction between feelers and thinkers. In fact, it's not at all related to MBTI - though there may be correlations. Rather, it's involvement versus independence, and the participation of members on this forum is a perfect example of how there's a robust, balanced spectrum between both within the INTP type. Where do you fall?

With this robustness comes confusion, since people on different sides of the spectrum often miscommunicate. This confusion will occasionally lead to animosity from both sides. The more independent are often seen (from the involved) as too dry, rude, inconsiderate, out of touch, or even immature*. The more involved are often branded (by the independent) as cliquish, chatty, frequently off topic, or incapable of having a serious discussion. Annoyance abounds.

Can you see any of this behavior in yourself? If yes, do you think you can do anything about it, or is it too much of an effort for something as trivial as INTPcentral?

*Likely based on the notion that INTPs develop Fe as they mature.

!diom
19 Sep 2008, 12:06 AM
Wusses.

Corbin
19 Sep 2008, 01:52 AM
i could see myself as falling on either side; i would like to think that i am more independent, but if i were completely independent i wouldn't be here.

Ferrus
20 Sep 2008, 07:38 PM
Somewhat simplified: some porcupines have different bristles than others and irritate me less than others. I can spend hours feeling energised with intellectual introverts, despite being normally anti-social.

disTant_eCHo
22 Sep 2008, 10:20 PM
Nice comparison, and it definately makes sense. I'm more the type to keep my distance, and when I say something it is very to-the-point and get-it-out-of-the-way.

Znaniya
12 Oct 2008, 12:57 PM
Linguists say that language is perhaps the strongest measure of where people are most comfortable. Those who choose to keep their distance are much more straightforward and matter-of-fact when they communicate, and they're quick to "get down to business" rather than engaging in small-talk.

I often find myself noticing I've been terribly abrupt to people, I've been wandering around in my own world and these minutae are interruptions to my train of action/thought.

For example, I'll go and see the secretary of my department for some particular purpose, and all I'll give is "hi *****, how are you? Fine? Me too. Now, can I have xxxxx?" I'm always surprised when she starts asking me about myself, and I come across as somewhat impatient. I am, though!

The small talk gets in the bloody way of my personal mission, damn it. I'm trying to improve.