Any special effects sufferer ?

[5-reed]

It's been since 1996 that I've been suffering from light psychosis / possible light schizophrenia. "Light" because at the moment it's not too spectacular, but sufficient to prevent me from living normally : no job, no girlfriend, almost no friends. I think introvert in general and IN in particular are predisposed to this sort of trouble... So beware !

Basically the symptoms are simple : auditive hallucinations (people in the street calling me "dumb" or "not a man" or "at last, he's a man" followed by "yes, he's dumb" etc... very poor content most of the time, but always a sense of being the center of the world), and delirant theories to prove that those halluciantions may be true.
Curiously, when I am with people whose opinion of myself should count, I don't have those hallucinations.
A few years ago I experienced several accute deliriums (really taking off from reality, all the experience of reality being questionned, and a sensation of being some sort of god), and a few depersonnalisation episodes(not recognising myself and my personnality, no emotions at all, being very neutral and having a sort of fog between me and the world). The accute deliriums have been the fun part, and if it hadn't to be linked with all the day to day difficulties, I would recommend it as a very joyful experience. Sadly, the few hours of "top of the fun paradise" aren't worth the years of suffering...

So, why do I expose all that would you probably think ?
Well, probably it's a part of my identity now and I feel like I have to share this experience with people I think may understand. A little advice : if you're introvert or maybe social phobic, and you're in a situation where people aren't accepting you like you are, you'd better not force and try at all cost to adapt, because it's that that lost me.
Ahh it's good to empty my bag....

[spirilis]

Thank you for sharing this with us. While I don't think I've experienced any of these symptoms... sometimes I think it's worth knowing what they're like, knowing what to look for in case they ever start... considering they say 1 in 100 people experience schizophrenia in any varying form (mild to severe) some time in their lifetime.

[EternalCynic]

Thank you, this has been extremely helpful to me. I've had several of these symptons, mild in comparison I'm sure, but a little frightening nonetheless.
Thank you very much

[5-reed]

In fact, after a little web research, it seems that schizoid personnality could be related to INTP & INTJ types. I don't want to frighten anyone... Schizoidy isn't a mental disorder, just a word to describe the personnality of people who are predisposed to schizophrenia...
So, if something similar happens to you, the best advice I can give is find a good psychiatrist and DO WHAT HE/SHE SAYS. Especially when it comes to meds.
As for the symptoms, it's just my personnal experience, they can be very varied from case to case.
Ok, I turn the "old veteran mode" off...

[Laeskis]

My mother is a diagnosed 'paranoid schizophrenic'. That's been a monkey slapping me in the back of the head for awhile...
before I took a personality test, I thought I must have inherited some similar unbalanced situation..inherited a little bit (a lot?) of insanity--now I know better.
I still worry at odd times about the probability of taking after my mother ...

[5-reed]

Eheheh Made a fool of myself, I didn't check for the definition of schizoid personnality. I'll try not to just follow my preconception of things in the future... In France this word it's not used anymore.

Anyway, schizophrenia isn't such a big thing... Well I just speak for myself here, and anyway I autodiagnosed myself : when I ask my psy for a clear diagnostic, he just says that the most important is not to put a word on my problems, it's to solve them... And I think he's right... I should act accordingly I suppose.

[5-reed]

Well, when it comes to mental troubles, I think each case is unique, so categorising people is only useful to have a general approach. Shrink says those categories are only useful for psys to communicate between each other... And I don't think it's stupid. For the med part, I agree it's useful, but to solve troubles you have to follow a true therapy, and then each case is different.

By re-reading my first post in this thread, I see I've not been very clear : the symptoms I described are mine. In particular, the auditive hallucinations are only mines. People with this sort of trouble can have hallucinations far more frightening : visual, tactile, even odours and cold/heat.
So, I insist that I've only a mild form which isn't that incapacitating; so, EternalCynic, no need for beeing panicked if you experienced similar stuff, you just should seek competent psychological support, I think. By acting rapidly, you can avoid future problems.
For me the best therapy was "psychoanalysis inspired therapy". And Neuro-Linguistic Programmation helped a little too, but it's just basically little tricks you learn to calm down.

[EternalCynic]

Oh yes, I understand that. The truth is that I've been trying to seek help for some time now and have yet to find a method that works for me. Still, thank you for your post, and thank you for your concern

[commander blop]

"It is perhaps no accident that many great scientists, leaders, and religious prophets seem to walk the crater rim of the volcano of psychosis, and to have relatives with schizophrenia. James Joyce, Albert Einstein, Carl Gustav Jung, and Bertrand Russell all had close relatives with schizophrenia. Isaac Newton and Immanual Kant might both be described as 'schizotypal.' One absurdly precise study estimates that 28% prominent scientists, 60% composers, 73% painters, 77% novelists, and an astonishing 87% poets have shown some degree of mental disturbance."
-Matt Ridley(The Agile Gene: How Nature Turns on Nurture p.122)

This (the following) is probably inaccurate and if someone understands it better, please let me know, but I think of "schitzo-" in terms of whenever I am on the fence about something. I often view things from two adverse angles. My poetry is often about dichotomies and I have a tendancy to play devil's advocate and a reluctancy to settle on a specific view or paradigm. This, I believe is largely intp, though it may have nothing to do with being schitzotypal.

I do have some subtly errie occurances, but I don't think I have any legitimate symptoms of schitzoprenia. I do have a distant relative diagnosed with it though. Not knowing any intp's, with the exception of my dad who has even a harder time keeping things together than I do. It's interesting to see how often the topic comes up here.

[jyakulis]

heh well you know take care of yourself and stressful events in your life...it can get a lot worse...you on any antipsychotics?