Networking/Reciprocity

[INTrPosr]

I hate having to network, specifically when trying to obtain a job or gain access to the powers that be for an interview. I am sure that it is based on my independent nature + need for autonomy and skepticism about having to be socially indebted to others. I was trying to locate the INTP description which claimed that INTPs hate social indebtedness. Rhetorical question, but do any of you find social networking easy?

[Sam172]

No, I hate it

[int]

Can't stand it. Pessimism mostly, but the need to put on a temporary facade is a joke as well.

[SensEye]

Hate it.

[Google Monster]

Anything that requires "social" isn't a like. unless we are speaking of anti-social, well not we but if I am speaking of anti-social to myself, I would be crazy.

[Avengardh]

It depends...I loathe it at first but then get used to it. I can take so much of it though.

~*Aven*~

[Johnny]

Networking is hard work for me too.

[MacGuffin]

Networking is very hard for me. I just don't do it well at all. I want friends, not social contacts.

[Laeskis]

I dislike networking a great deal.
Seems to much like a "Who you know, not what you know" situation.
I despise those.

[Crazy]

i don't like networking. It is interesting that INTP's don't like it in general. Networking is one of the most useful forms of social interaction. It is a system that serves a purpose. I suppose it is the bullshit facade and mandatory social pleasantries that cause us to dislike it so. At least with an actual friendship you can throw the social pleasantries out the window, or shorten them and get down to business.

[Google Monster]

If networking involved computers that would be a different story, :)

[s]

I despise the concept, but I am learning to have to just deal with it after years of swimming against the tide. I grew up in an environment where who you know is everything. Teachers treated students diferently based on who their parents were, kids got into the GT program, because of their mother's cousin, and everyone asks "who" you are, not what is your name. I used to fight it, but now I use it to my advantage. I still hate it.

[Jkrs]

The whole 'social' thing depends on the people involved; I might actually find an intelligent conversation to participate in. Asking someone to do something like Functianalyst mentioned, though, seems.. unclean.

[Horger]

I hate talking to new people. I hate everything about setting up a "network" of people.

I like to let the chips fall where they may, and actually connect to people on a personal basis.

[INTrPosr]

Okay from reading the responses you confirm my thoughts that Networking is clearly hard. Here is a hypothetical. You are not clear what you want to do career wise, however, are definite it's not what you currently do.

While surfing the net, you come across a job that fits your present knowledge, skills and ability to a tee. You get that tingling feeling and obesess on the "what if's", began visualize yourself in the job, etc..... You make attempts to find out as much as possible about the job, and even become impetuous in contacting HR. In your mind, you are the person for the job, and may strongly believe that it's yours for the taking. You go as far as to contact the HR Dept, but find they can only answer questions that you have already found information on. You then recall that someone that you are somewhat acquainted with has contacts with this company. I say somewhat acquainted because the two of you are not friends by any means, and maybe your entire contacts with this person has never been in person. Are you desparate to make the call for a favor? If so, how do you go about asking, and what will you ask the person to do for you? Do you feel socially indebted, afterwards? Do you make attempts to relieve yourself of what you consider a social debt?

The only reason that I am asking these questions is because clearly INTPs are not immune to a need for support, although a thought of being interdependent is...... :angry: I have no problem providing favors, but hate asking for them. However, lately I appear to be more opportunistic than I have been in a while, and am realizing that the need for contacts is the only way to get ahead. This sounds sooooooo ENTP!

[Boozer]

Yeah networking and social climbing has never been my strong suit. But I have found that once you get your foot in the door, your other strengths help mitigate the need for ass-kissing to get ahead. But I've found that to get your foot into that door, it's not what you know, but who. :(

As for your own dillema, it's a tough one, but just think of it as a mental challenge. I wouldn't worry too much about the "social debt". But how to talk to the person out of the blue and ask for this favor can be tricky. Although I find that people are understanding when it comes to looking for work. I don't think you'll need to beat around the bush too much.

[Ckyzxr]

Social networking is a chore but not as hideous as "shmoozing". I despise having to play to this phenomenon at Company or Social/Family functions. I would rather ingest tropical poisons, however this is a very important part of business relationships. How can something so shallow and superficial be so important in business? I get a sickly feeling just imagining the sheer number of large business deals sealed over a round of golf or martini lunches. Blech! :sick:

[Claverhouse]

I get a sickly feeling just imagining the sheer number of large business deals sealed over a round of golf or martini lunches. Blech! :sick:

Yup. There's something rotten when business/government types* have to have all this semi-corrupt socialising, particularly golf, to do their 'work'. Why not just separate 'business', do it efficiently and honestly; then socialise for fun ?


Claverhouse :ph34r:


* In mine own country, local councillors, particularly those with contracts, are very prone to all this.

[last_caress]

Networking, to me always held the implication that one was interacting with others not out of the sheer joy of their company, but for their utility.

[PsiKik]

Networking, to me always held the implication that one was interacting with others not out of the sheer joy of their company, but for their utility.

Yes exactly, but part of knowing about MBTI type means being aware of what you must change about yourself. Networking is very usefull for any type, though very difficult for INTP.