Maturity

[Avengardh]

Are INTPs too mature for their age? Have you been told this in the past? Do you think you are too mature for your age?

I have been told that I am "wise", but I like to think that it's just logical thinking based on experiences and intuition. Although I often find myself giving advice to people who are much older than me (I am 20), who ask me for it, such as 40 or 50 yr olds, and they always tell me that I know so much, I give such good advice, etc etc.

I know this might also be because I am female, but I had always been the "serious but polite child who liked to talk to adults better than kids her own age", it's still the same, but sometimes I find adults not taking me seriously because I look younger (when I used to work people often thought I was from 14 to 16, I was really 18....) and people my own age think I am just so "wise". Anyone experience this? Any other thoughts or commments??

~*Aven*~

[CosmicDust]

I've also been told I'm wise or mature for my age. I think it comes for a natural disposition towards a detached outlook and thinking about "big things," a kind of perspective many people (Sensors especially) often don't pick up until they're much older. I was not an angsty teenager, and can only remember about two mild standoffs with my mother. I was socially and emotionally immature and not a natural at common sense, though. I'm still emotionally immature, crying about failure. I also haven't gone through major rites of passage like getting a car, a driver's license, or laid, but I haven't really needed those to fill my agenda.

[file cabinet]

maybe I am ? it really depends on your definition of maturity.. which you did not define for us...

[spirilis]

I was very mature for my age... up until age 18 or so. After that, either as a stride to become more mainstream or as a natural progression of mental abilities, I severely receeded into a crazy jerk.

I think the Ti does it, and eventually Ne, once it becomes well developed, softens up your behavior so you become more open and less structured.

[Johnny]

My experience has been that children who think about the big stuff get branded as mature, while adults who think about the big stuff get branded as children...they haven't made up their minds about life yet and keep asking the nagging questions... :lol:

[Hyperion]

You got that right Johnny. :D

[Sam172]

I'm seen as older than I really am and more mature. However I sometimes have a few minutes of complete insanity which reflects my stifled inner child....

I've been mistaken as a 35-40 year old man on the internet before :o

[libertarianjim]

I was very mature for my age right up until I got divorced, at which point I became very immature. I was probably more mature at 16 then I am now.

[BritainOphira]

It really just depends on the situation with me. I can either act completely responsible and rational, or I can be completely immature and childish.
Of course, now that I think of it, my "childish" is much more mature than most of my friend's "mature."

[Laeskis]

I'm not immature, but I'm not too mature.
Matter of fact, I'm just stuck....somewhere.

Sometimes my time bubble mystifies me.

[EternalCynic]

I get told that very often, too. When I first started using the 'net for communication means (I was 12) people thought I was in my 20's or 30's :huh:. Still today people say that I'm "too mature", but I guess that's a matter of opinion :).

[Avengardh]

maybe I am ? it really depends on your definition of maturity.. which you did not define for us...

Me == sorry.

I really think it depends on what you think, to me you might be mature, but to others you might not be. Or maybe you are, what do you think about it, and what have you been told?

I am only called "wise/mature" because I seem to be able to solve problems without getting too emotional and see every side and consequence to things that other people might not think about. Perhaps also because I am more sympathetic/empathetic, but in truth, I don't really know why peple call me that.

~*Aven*~

[s]

My experience has been that children who think about the big stuff get branded as mature, while adults who think about the big stuff get branded as children...they haven't made up their minds about life yet and keep asking the nagging questions... :lol:

Well put.

I have always been considered precocious partially due to my IQ, but whether or not I fit all defintions of maturity, I do not know. Some may think watching cartoons or playing in the rain makes me immature, while others would consider my having well managed mortgage and car payments as mature.

[Vagabond]

Hmm. I'm just here 'cause I enjoy clicking on polls... :P It depends on what one considers as maturity...

[Avengardh]

Hmm. I'm just here 'cause I enjoy clicking on polls... :P It depends on what one considers as maturity...

I knew you would say that happppy

~*Aven*~

[Vagabond]

But why... can't imagine... :cheers:

[Seraph]

Absolutely. As INTP's, we just know things that other types don't. We're wiser and able to fathom complex issues that others struggle with. At my age, it's especially noticeable. The extroverts are like toddlers!

[Vagabond]

Maturity is not just about knowledge. Actually, knowledge might have the least to do with it.

[flan2dave]

It's more like being comfortable with not knowing.

[Google Monster]

I feel I am mature. I still gamble with childishness often though. But my childish ways are all in fun and never done at the wrong times.

[shaytana]

I am old and wise and very immature.
I like it that way.

Although as a child I was always seen as far too mature for my age.

[cloakable]

There's no such thing as too mature. Or too sarcastic, cynical, or ironic either.

[NGene]

My experience has been that children who think about the big stuff get branded as mature, while adults who think about the big stuff get branded as children...they haven't made up their minds about life yet and keep asking the nagging questions... :lol:
My thoughts exactly. Many intelligent people are considered "mature" as children, but when they grow up, they're considered "immature" because they haven't lost their childlike curiosity, creativity and... the nagging questions.

[file cabinet]

so what this thread has determined... as we get older we get wiser, not necessarily more mature.

[NGene]

Maturity is not just about knowledge. Actually, knowledge might have the least to do with it.
I've noticed that kids, who know more than kids of their age usually do, are sometimes really annoying. Especially when they're not more mature than any other kids of their age. They just become snobbish and arrogant because of their knowledge.

The same sometimes seems to happen to kids with straight A's or high IQ's if they're not otherwise mature enough.

[ohnoaninfp]

I am mature, I guess. A couple of my friends are jumping into things they are not ready for. Why in the hell is everyone trying to get pregnant? I know that I am not ready for a baby. I will be ready when I have a place to live, the financial and mental ability to raise a child. No onew thinks things through. They act like having a baby is like going to get a puppy. A baby needs constant care, unlike a puppy that you just feed him and play with him a little. Your child should be the priority. You have to give up many things, get up a 3 am to change or feed him, and be there for him always. My friends just don't seem to get this.

[shee]

I've always considered myself pretty mature for my age. I'm the middle child in the family, but my older brother is autistic, so from a pretty young age I've had to watch over both of them. I had my "teenage rebellion" when I was 10, and have gotten along great with my parents ever since (and I'm now 22).

I've had hard times from early on, I was mercilessly picked on and bullied by the bigger and snobbier kids in my private gradeschool (I'm young for my grade, and my transition through puberty was a rough one), and I found my escape in books, which fortunately included subjects of psychology, which helped me develop good coping mechanisms and anger management and stuff.

I was able to pick myself up and start anew in public high school though, and made many lifelong friends. Since I've started college, I've turned back into an introvert, but I still continue to observe and examine people and their behaviors (hence one of my majors: psychology). It's just something I've always been interested in, I guess. :) I always feel control over my emotions, and I believe I am a pretty stable, and considerate person (though I wasn't always one). I have unconditional values and direction, so I would consider myself pretty mature :)

But that doesn't mean that if you put a big spider or centipede in front of me I won't scream like a baby and run away ;)

[Avengardh]

ohnoaninfp: I won't ever be ready :]

shee: I used to be a brat when I was a kid, more like, I wasn't nice. But I think I really matured once I hit 12 or so, now I am 20 and I don't see the difference from when I was 15-16, so I sometimes feel like I should just have a staying age, cause I still feel the same and have the same values :]

~*Aven*~

[Laeskis]

When I was a kid, I was really quiet and read a lot of books. When I did interact with the other kids I tended to 'play' with the bad kids....even had teachers pull me to the side and tell me that I should go play with the other 'good' kids.
I don't think I was considered any more mature than anyone else...especially because when I was young I would get angry every now and again and throw a baseball bat or something at another kid.
I also used to get suspended on a regular basis; 3-4 times a year.
Yep, I'd definitely say I wasn't mature.

[s]

Maturity is not just about knowledge. Actually, knowledge might have the least to do with it.
I've noticed that kids, who know more than kids of their age usually do, are sometimes really annoying. Especially when they're not more mature than any other kids of their age. They just become snobbish and arrogant because of their knowledge.

The same sometimes seems to happen to kids with straight A's or high IQ's if they're not otherwise mature enough.

Hey, now... :angry:

Wait... yea, I was annoying as a kid.

Precocious little terd,

[Arioch]

I've been thought of as very mature and at other times immature.. often by the same people.

That said I don't think I'm too mature or immature. I am as I want to be and with this I am satisfied.

[EternalCynic]

Hmm, just came upstairs from dinner with my parents and their guests.. thought I would share a little tidbit:

I was asked to be the designated driver on a trip to TP their friends houses.

Keep in mind that they are all 40 years old or over.

Maturity is relative :), but in this case, just ridiculous :huh:

[INTrPosr]

I do consider myself somewhat mature, but I was more mature when growing up. Very responsible and was always played surrogate parent to my my older and younger brother. As I became older, my family and friends continued to expect me to do the right thing. I guess at some point it violated my principles of being me. Lost my self in the whole mess.

Interesting enough, I never dated girls my own age. As I entered college, I began to look for older women. I was not sure why, until I realized that it was their maturity that I was seeking, but some perception that maturity=independent. That flew out the window when I dated a very clingy older woman.

[Boozer]

I was always been cosidered very mature as a kid, but as I get older everyone else seems to be catching up, so it's becoming less and less noticable. Also, my fascination with anime (which most consider to be just japaneese cartoons, ie: just for kids) and video games has helped to mitigate this.

I think Johnny said it best. We just dream about the big thing a lot. as a kid this makes you mature, as an adult it makes you an impractical.

ah well screw 'em, time to solve the world's problems during my lunch break.