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Thread: what to say to someone who's having a bad day?

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    Member Array thenightwasglory's Avatar
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    Default what to say to someone who's having a bad day?

    i never know what to say. when i need to help someone emotional, it's easier for me to do it in action. help them do things, take care of them if they don't feel good, etc. but i've a friend online who's had a terrible day and i'm just not sure what to say. she's an enfp.

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    Senior Member Array Ivy's Avatar
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    "I'm sorry you're having a bad day"...?

    The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
    -graffiti on the wall of the basilica in Pompeii

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    Member Array thenightwasglory's Avatar
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    i want to help, not just acknowledge that her day was bad...

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    I conduct vanity searches Array Rajah's Avatar
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    Cheer up, kiddo. Tomorrow might be worse.



    Okay, okay, I wouldn't recommend that. If she's ENFP, just say something like you get that today's rough, you wish it weren't, and you're there for her.

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    Senior Member Array Ivy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thenightwasglory View Post
    i want to help, not just acknowledge that her day was bad...
    Sometimes the acknowledgement is the best way to help.

    The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
    -graffiti on the wall of the basilica in Pompeii

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    I conduct vanity searches Array Rajah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thenightwasglory View Post
    i want to help, not just acknowledge that her day was bad...
    I'm sure she's not looking for an action plan, just a friend.

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    Member Array thenightwasglory's Avatar
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    hm. i guess that's true. i suppose i just prefer action to speech, on this head.

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    I conduct vanity searches Array Rajah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thenightwasglory View Post
    hm. i guess that's true. i suppose i just prefer action to speech, on this head.
    It's a T/F thing. Value in talking about feelings for its own sake.

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    Member Array thenightwasglory's Avatar
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    expound on that?

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    While this isn't an immediate help, I'd recommend Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.

    I don't necessarily believe the gender division of behavior is particularly accurate the book does an exceptional job at explaining the behavior and expectations of Fs and Ts, extraverts and intraverts. It has a great deal to say about this in particular.

    It's best if she is in fact an ENFP to acknowledge her feelings and lend a sympathetic ear. Since you can't act anyways, it's even moreso the best option. Not being an F I can't expound upon why this is the preferred behavior on your part, but it most likely is.

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