Page 1 of 5 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 44

Thread: having a male or female for your psychologist/therapist

  1. #1
    Senior Member Array file cabinet's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Twin Cities
    Type
    INTP
    Posts
    3,797

    Default having a male or female for your psychologist/therapist

    I was considering the possibility of seeing a psychologist last night (there is no strong particular reason why). The main thought I was stuck on was the gender of the psychologist. At first I thought, well, a female one would be interesting because I may open up more to her(because she subconciously reminds me of my mother and that'd be comforting) but it would be more potentially awkward when discussing sexual matters. A male one would probably be fine and I couldn't think of any problems associated with that.
    what was your experience been like with a male or female psychologist/therapist?
    if you haven't seen one before, which one would you choose and why?

  2. #2
    Void Filled! Array nottaprettygal's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Baltimore
    Type
    INTJ
    Posts
    3,105

    Default

    I think it depends on what issues you want to discuss. Age and experience are probably equally as important.

    Personally, I've had both male and female therapists. I felt uncomfortable talking to the male therapist because our conversations were often about my womanhood, something that he could never understand. Eh. I felt uncomfortable around the female therapists too. Come to think of it, therapy is just not a comfortable experience in general.

  3. #3
    Ugh. Array abathur's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Norfolk, VA
    Type
    INTP
    Posts
    2,299

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nottaprettygal View Post
    Come to think of it, therapy is just not a comfortable experience in general.
    That's the thing to keep in mind. Though, I'll admit, I've come to enjoy it, in a way. I imagine it depends on you and what you're wanting to deal with more than your gender. Talking about sex issues with an opposite gender therapist is, of course, a little awkward.

    I had a male therapist handle my intake appointment, and I got a very good vibe off him. That was his last week, though. I ended up with another male therapist who thought he was understanding, but wasn't, and couldn't quit saying he was impressed I didn't have more problems, when I'd explained where I was coming from. Ugh?

    A big part of why I was in, in the first place, was to deal with invalidation/rejection issues. After the third appointment he said he didn't think he could do anything more for me, and dismissed me. I walked out and had a good laugh about getting rejected by my therapist.

    After a few weeks, I knew there was more I wanted out of that process that I didn't get, so I went back and asked for a new counselor, and for some evaluatory testing. Because of the testing, I was assigned to a (female) clinical psychology intern (so, someone with less experience than the previous counselor, but the guy who performed the intake appt. was also an intern.)

    It's gone well, overall. Some things are awkward to bring up, but I also feel more comfortable sharing feelings that aren't very stereotypically male with a female counselor.
    http://escarp.org (It's a text-message-based literary journal. So we publish super-brief poetry and prose.)

    Quote Originally Posted by Eye-In-TiPi View Post
    I've often wondered how many miles of dick I've given my wife. I'm not gonna throw any real numbers out there, but just say if I had an average 6" weiner, for example, it would take 10,560 thrusts to give her a mile of dick. If I average 1 thrust per second and go for 15 minutes, that works out to 450 ft of dick in a session- not even a tenth of a mile. I wonder what my odometer would say.

  4. #4
    Banned Array bergenski's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Charleston, SC
    Type
    ENTP
    Posts
    4,611

    Default

    I'd be inclined to go with a female, as they seem to be more empathetic, generally, but I'd probably try to get meetings with two males and two females to feel out a connection.

  5. #5
    Calmer than you are, dude Array ApeTheDog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Belgium
    Type
    INTP
    Posts
    11,123

    Default

    If I'm allowed to go off-topic here for a while (on topic: I'd personally go with a female one, because I feel more comfortable talking to females), I'm surprised to see that three level-headed individuals and berginiski have all visited a therapist.

    How prevalent is it actually in american culture to do this? And for what reasons do people visit these people? What kind of therapy do they tend to subscribe?

    In my culture, it is extremely unlikely for anybody to visit a psychiatrist. It is very much seen as a sign of madness, and exclusively seen as a kind of "you HAVE to visit a psychiatrist" thing rather than something you would choose to do out of your own free will.

    That is my current opinion on the matter. I would not visit one, disbelieving that they could help me much, and thinking instead that they would in fact make me feel as though I wasn't responsable for my own psychological health/mind anymore (absolving me of my responsability for a financial compensation - absolving people of responsabilities for financial compensation is something I tend to reject on principle). I'm looking to enrich my opinion by reading more perspectives out of the land of the therapist/self-help book.
    No animals were harmed during the writing of this post.

  6. #6
    Banned Array MacGuffin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Alexandria, VA
    Type
    INTP
    Posts
    27,155

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ApeTheDog View Post
    In my culture, it is extremely unlikely for anybody to visit a psychiatrist. It is very much seen as a sign of madness, and exclusively seen as a kind of "you HAVE to visit a psychiatrist" thing rather than something you would choose to do out of your own free will.
    That used to be a common mindset in the U.S. Still exists to some degree. In urban cities on the coast this has almost disappeared to the point where people think it might be strange you have never had therapy.

    Nice to hear Europeans are even more backwards than Americans in some areas!

  7. #7
    Calmer than you are, dude Array ApeTheDog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Belgium
    Type
    INTP
    Posts
    11,123

    Default

    Perhaps. I'm not convinced that a therapist is necesary, or can do me good. What kind of changes for the better do they bring out in their clients?
    No animals were harmed during the writing of this post.

  8. #8
    Banned Array
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    New Zealand
    Type
    INTJ
    Posts
    6,951

    Default

    Why do you need to pay a therapist hundreds of $$$ to tell you what you already know?

  9. #9
    Senior Member Array
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Type
    XXXX
    Posts
    559

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by file cabinet View Post
    what was your experience been like with a male or female psychologist/therapist?
    if you haven't seen one before, which one would you choose and why?
    I had a female during my teens and It worked out really well. This time around I couldn't find a female close to my area, I was looking specifically for a Jungian analyst (like the last one), so I went with a guy. Up to this point, it didn't make any difference. I had some reservations in the beginning though.

  10. #10
    Ubi sunt Array Ferrus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Sittingbourne, Kent, UK
    Type
    INTP
    Posts
    15,104

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ApeTheDog View Post
    In my culture, it is extremely unlikely for anybody to visit a psychiatrist. It is very much seen as a sign of madness, and exclusively seen as a kind of "you HAVE to visit a psychiatrist" thing rather than something you would choose to do out of your own free will.
    Only 5-10 years ago that attitude was prevalent here too - and still is in more working class areas - but among the middle class, and especially the urban middle class the situation is becoming ever more as it is in America.

    Although I shall say that the notion that middle class parents don't have time to look after their kids so just buy them Ritalin/therapy instead is quite common.

Similar Threads

  1. How Male/Female is Your Writing?
    By s0978 in forum Online Tests
    Replies: 75
    Last Post: 24 Feb 2010, 05:43 PM
  2. How male or female is your brain?
    By tragula in forum Online Tests
    Replies: 103
    Last Post: 1 Jun 2006, 02:30 PM
  3. Are Angels Male or Female?
    By Birdsnest in forum Philosophy & Spirituality
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 18 Feb 2006, 06:03 AM
  4. Male or female - how are we distributed?
    By Biff_Loman in forum The Local Pub
    Replies: 79
    Last Post: 12 Feb 2006, 05:23 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •